although i agree with most of what everyone else said im going to come at you from a different angle. I am a woman with pcos. what you are describing to me sounds like depression. im wondering if maybe your fiance' is more concerned about this than you think but doesn't know what to do about it. I was in the same situation and still am most of the time. i was 108 lbs. when my husband and i got together. i am now 198 and am only 5'2 talk about depressing!! i am just starting a new dose of met and am trying to low carb and exercise. however to get to my point.... when i first started the plucking i was so embarassed. i would push away my husband any time he got close but i would make sure the hair was gone so he wouldnt know for fear he would not understand. i had no sex drive because my own body made me ill. it had nothing to do with him but i couldnt explain it to him so he would understand so he thought i had lost interest in him. most days i didnt feel like getting fixed up because my clothes didnt fit right, my skin looked a mess, etc, etc. i just didnt feel feminine and couldnt deal with this all. luckily my husband has hung in there with me . he has never made a mean remark or said a word about my weight. we still have some problems because of my ability to deal with this not his. im not telling you it is easy because it is not . just know that most of what your fiance' is going through is normal for this disorder. after i talked to my husband and finally broke down in tears and explained why i didnt want him to touch my face things got better. she will do this when she feels she can,,,,, i mean explain what she is feeling. this is an emotional rollercoaster!!! and im sure when you said she is overweight and unpleasant to be around you are probly right. i am also. but this is not something she can wave a wand and have disappear. talk with her, make her feel she is still sexy, and dont pressure when she doesnt seem to want to talk. all i can tell you is that you eventually get used to the skin you are living in. i hate being overweight but i have finally got to the point where i know if i want to change i am the only one who can change it. if you love her stick with her. she needs your support even when she shoves you away. i wish i could explain it better but im not that great at this stuff. just know it doesnt have to do with you but it does have everything to do with her. i love my husband even when i dont want him to touch me and i dont fix my hair or dress up.
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Angie , married 8 yrs. 2 kids. daughter who is 7 and son who is 2 . diagnosed in feb. 2002 pcos and IR. |