What a sad story. It rang all too familiar to me, too.
The hospital where I had Rivi did allow me to stay a little longer - I think that was because I had an infection, though.
They didn't know where to put me, either. On the L&D ward, babies were everywhere. They put me in antenatal, but there, I could hear the other babies' heartbeats on monitors, and it hurt so much knowing that Rivi's had stopped.
They were also very good about letting us see him when we wanted to. They put us in the smaller chapel, which is conveniently right across from the NICU. We were able to spend as long as we wanted the day he died, and we went back to see him the next morning, before we left.
I agree about the social workers - the hospital only had one, and she was very understanding, but we needed her immediately after he died - she didn't come for several hours. After I had Dominici, though, she came to see me and gave me PPD literature and a number to call if my grief over Rivi started to interfere with mothering Dominici. She even offered to have my doc start me on antidepressants right away - wish I'd listened, 'cause that PPD kicked my ass.
Every family should have as much time as they need to say goodbye, and I love the project this couple's working on. |