SOFLDAN

Hi to all the wonderful men and ladies on this board. I appreciate the forum because it is a place for us men to learn, cope, and work out the struggles that come along with having a wife with PCOS.

A little about myself and my life's journey so far. Born and raised in Key West Florida. Joined the Army, married once and divorced once before meeting the sweetheart I am married to today. Initially when I went to college I was studying to be a psychology major, but that eventually turned into business management.

At 32 years of age I am a husband, father (of 2 girls I adopted during my first marriage), and a grandfather. No kids of my own. Several months ago while going through one of those phases in life where the road is full of pot holes and axle breaking bumps, I found out my wife had PCOS. I had no idea what PCOS was and because of issues that were going on in our lives we probably werent communicating on the best of levels. So I researched the issue using the wonderful search tool called google.

The results from the search were staggering in numbers so site by site I started to investigate what this PCOS was. The more I learned the worse I felt for my wife. I at the time really could have cared less about having kids. Kinda been there done that so it was not on the top of my "To Do" list. But as I read more and more I came to the point where I could understand her pain in this situation.

And as we came through the issues we were having our bonds grew stronger and I felt more and more like I was really wanting to have children. And my wife was being bit on a daily basis by the baby bug.

So after we talked about the baby issue we decided first we needed to try and get her regular. At this point her cycles were way out of wack and only God knows when the last time she actually ovulated is. So she went to her Female Doc and was given a drug (forgot the name) which would bring on her period and then we would try regulating with birth control for a couple months then try for a baby.

Well the drug she was given brought on a 25 day or so period. Which really had me worried after the second week. But the doctor said it was pretty normal. Then she went on the BC and her hormones went wacky, mood swings, temper tantrums, crying every time the wind blows, etc. So after 2 months of that we talked and said no more BC, lets go a month see what happens and see the Doc.

Well now that time has passed and no baby. So today we went and saw the Doc and we will be starting on clomid (sp?), with the next monthly cycle. Throughout all of this I have tried to learn about what she is going through and I feel for each and every husband, wife, and domestic partner who is going through this. Not only the physical aspects of the condition but the mental aspects can drain you and make you feel so blue.

We have discussed all options thus far besides adoption. I am not entirely sure how I feel about that right now. I know how much it means to my wife to have a family and I know we will have to talk about it in detail at some point if the meds and treatments don't work.

But through this all I very much love my wife and hope that we can have our family together. God willing and it will be. To all the husbands, partners, etc out there remember your support is fundamental with your wife dealing with this issue. Learn what you can about it. Understand that she needs your support. It's more than physical this problem, guys think about the emotional strain you would have if the Doc told you your swimmers were broken. Kinda demoralizing isn't it.

Again thanks for the forum I am looking forward to getting to know as many of you as I can. And to my wife.


I love you.