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kok1922 · 04-05-2008, 10:00 PM

Hi

I think that you need to do what is best for your long term future right now. If you think they would pull you out of college and pull financial support, then don't tell them now and get through college. Is that selfish? Yes, it is but you're parents are being incredibly selfish by refusing to love their daughter for the amazing person that she is right now and will be in the future.

Get through college. After college, remind them that you are bi (as you said you told them before) and be prepared for the worst (emotionally) but at least you'll have a college degree to support yourself financially.

As someone 15yrs older than you and partnered for 13yrs with two kids, I can tell you that while parental relationships are very important to us, they only define who we are if we let them. There is so much more to life than worrying about what your parents think and feel.

And, in the 15yrs since I've been out, I've seen tremendous changes in the acceptance level of different family members on my side and my partner's side. We just lived our lives with confidence, love, and respect and after a few years, they realized we were not going to apologize for being lesbians. We were not going to beg for their forgiveness. And, you know what? Each and every one of them celebrated/sent presents when our daughters arrived and all of them invite us to holidays etc. It's not perfect, but good enough.

Good luck.