singularlydifferent

Hello Ladies well here I am again and having now seen 2 regular GYN's and now 2 GYN/Oncologists I have no good news to report. This last one agreed with the other 3 that if I am not going to have another baby then the hysterectomy is the method of choice over the medical option. I have refused and will keep refusing for as far as I can see. I guess what bothers me the most is the oh so very casual way they have all just decided that since I seem to be done with that particular body parts function it is now disposable. You know what, my reproductive system is not disposable! At least not to me. Besides they still can't prove I have or will develop endometrial cancer it's all a big what if and I seem to set thier teeth on edge because I don't want to be a good sheep and go along with the program. In fact this doctor got upset when I told him I wouldn't be gutted like a fish, he informed me that's not what is done to people but only to animals. I asked him how else should I describe it then. He changed the subject. I don't know ladies I am scared of getting cancer but I am also scared of never feeling like I am a woman again. My hubby just doesn't get it, I mean he is being supportive but he really wants me to have this surgery he says that he just wants to make sure I grow old with him. I know sweet right. I just can't get my head around why they (the docs) won't help me try another way, it's there they have all told me it was but I guess they just don't want the hassel of actually having to try and help someone. I don't know. What I do know is that I am taking sometime off of doctor's for awhile and am just going to be. Maybe in a few weeks or so I'll pick up the fight again (or at least try and get in with that specialist on PCOS) but I need sometime off. I have been dealing with this mess since DEC/JAN and I am so tired. I will try and keep you all updated though.

Now CrunchyMama what I would do if I were in your shoes and I have been is go ahead have the D&C get all the old stuff you can cleaned out of there and let them make sure that you are good to go and exactly what form of Hyperplasia you have. There are 4 types as far I have been able to find. There is simple hyperplasia and simple hyperplasia w/ atypia then there is complex hyperplasia and complex hyperplasia w/atypia (this is the most severe and the one I have) so have the D&C get your diagnoses and then have your doc make the best plan for you hopefully it will be the medical treatment but if not then make sure you fight for what is right for you. What I feel you should know is this, all of my paps were normal too that doesn't really seem to mean alot so don't use that as your guide. Also Endometrial Hyperplasia is a pre-pre cancerous condition or depending on how the condition is typed (see the above) a pre-cancerous condition. Any web sight you find will describe it as such. I have used ask.com and type in endometrial hyperplasia to find more sights and info. SO don't let anyone tell you that this is something to ignore it isn't. Also if you are heavy (again like me) try to lose wieght I know it's hard believe me I know, but this condition is triggered by excess estrogen and the docs aren't telling you (if they were like mine) that fat stores the estrogen that your body makes so that just makes it all worse. Good Luck Cruncy Mama my thoughts and prayers are with you and all the other ladies here as well.

BEEKERBUTT I can't forget you I SO APPRECIATE your kind words and feel like I just want to give you a big hug for understanding my feelings and lending me your support it means more than you will ever know and I am so grateful. I can only imagine that I would feel the same way if I had to have had a c- section. I was very lucky I didn't but what I do know is that while I would be feeling the same about not getting to participate and feeling like he was ripped from me I know that in your heart you are just glad that he is here and alive and healthy. I believe that if I were in your position then every time I started to feel angry about how he was born I would go and hold him (skin to skin if you can manage it) and try to let the love that he is here and doing well overcome the anger. Maybe that would work to help you come to grips. It's the best advice I have and I so admire you for being brave enough to share those feelings here in the thread I started. You are very brave.

Thank you also for telling me about your Mom. I have found that most of the women I have talked to that are happy with thier hysterectomys are older women or women that thier problems have negativly affected thier lives. I am not in either catagory so I can't feel like this is what has to happen to me not now. I have no severe issues and there is no real negative impact on my day to day life and I am only just turned 40 so not nearly old enough to want anything yanked out of me. So off on the great doctor hunt I go...well after a little rest I think.

Anyway thank you all for listening and putting up with my ranting. I will keep you all as up to date as I possible can.