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my2babies9806 · 07-07-2008, 10:20 AM

I'd like to chime in here about a few things. I do not consider myself to be Bi. I am straight. I have been with a few women, and I discovered it wasnt for me. I WAS confused bc i thought that if I thought another woman was sexy or attractive I must want to be with women. Well, after being with 4 or 5 women, always thinking the uncomfortable feeling and general unhappiness was just from not finding the right one, it occured to me that I do not want a relationship with women. Not romantic, not sexual, nothing like that. It took a while, but I came to see that you can look at a woman and say "wow, she really is beautiful. I love her hair and eyes." and it doesnt mean you want to "do" her. It can mean just what you said...that she's very pretty. I consider myself to have been bi curious, and that curiosity led me to the realization that I was straight and totally prefer men. ON THE OTHER HAND, my dh is bisexual. I did not know that when we first got together. He thought I would think less of him or leave him. I actually only found out about a year and a half ago. I found out bc he was cheating and I caught him. Our marriage almost ended, but not bc of him being bi. Because he lied and cheated. So we went to marriage counseling for 6 months, and he was shocked that I could be so ok with that side of him. We have what you would consider an "open" marriage. By that I mean that I DO allow him to be with men sexually. But he doesnt just sneak around. He tells me when he's talking to someone, I meet them, he tells me where and when he plans to "hook up" with them, and when it's done he comes straight home to me. We agreed that if I am ever upset or jealous or uncomfortable that he will not go and he will stay with me. He explained to me that I have 100% of his heart and soul. That he loves me and our kids UNCONDITIONALLY and FOREVER, but that this is just a sexual desire that he has. He is still very, very attracted to me and shows it everyday. Our sex life has actually improved TREMENDOUSLY bc now he doesnt always have the stress of hiding all of who he is. We have a deep, AMAZING connection now. He is equally sexually attracted to men and women. That does not make him experimenting or confused. He has been this way since he was a kid. And he's 33 now. I explained everything bc I wanted to show a person who WAS confused and experimenting (me) and a person who KNOWS what they like and it happens to be both men AND women (my dh).