I had the same problem when I was trying to adopt a baby. They approved me as a single adoption, told me my significant other and I both had to attend all classes, meetings, physicals, fingerprinting everything so we said ok. My signifcant other was fine with it being a single parent adoption until the baby came and he knew his name would not be listed as the father. Fortunately for him (I guess) when we went to finalize our adoption the judge refused to finalize, he said "I can't understand why you too have been together for so many years and our still not married? To me that noes not show stability in the relationship!" I also was not working at the time so he then said "I want to make sure you have the financial resources because there is no guarantee you 2 will stay together so either you 2 get married or you have to find a job showing a long time record that you can keep a job, the money you have in the bank is not going to last long with a baby!" So needless to say my significant other asks "what are we going to do?" and I say GET A JOB!" I saw the disappointment in his face (he's always said he will not get married) and needless to say we got back to our city and was married the next week. The judge originally said we had to wait 1 year to come back to finalize but changed his mind and finalized in 4 months! WE finalized the day before Valentines day
Maybe you guys should just get married if you are both happy together and maybe it will make things easier. Is there a reason you don't want to get married? I know calches asked that already but I too am curious.