Well here is mine:
Never been pregnant-well a chemical in November-but that was fishy-had bleeding and then week later + beta of 10-so the Re suspected a chemical.....
I am 36-about to be 37. DH has low sperm motility and morphology, so we get very little sperm after washing for IUI's, so we have been told a million times we need IVF-but not going to happen for us
And Dh smokes, which now pisses me off even more because we need him to quit to improve his numbers and that is gonna take months.
I had lap/hys on jan. 9th-started provera and got Af 1/24. Did Follistim and then an IUI on 2/7. Took Hpt's on 10,11,12dpo=all BFN. Went into HUGE depression. Next day took a FRER just in case-BFP! 4 more over the next few days-PREGNANT! I thought that surgery was my miracle worker because the Re did remove a HUGE polyp that was filling my uterus!
Betas were perfect, 129, 395, and then 3000! RE said everything was textbook. On crinone since the IUi and the p4 was 10, then 18, so he was happy with that and upped the crinone to 3x a day-never even spotted or anything.
First u/s-everything was fine-got a picture, felt good, but nervous because we only had a flutter heartbeat! However the RE said everything was ok-no need to worry and I will admit his machine is GARBAGE-and since I had a ton more u/s last week at other places I really cant believe I will ever trust his u/s machine again.
So we made the next u/s for a week later. I had the day off of work to do paperwork and so I made the appt. for early am so I could do work all day at home.
He started the dildo cam and I immediately knew something was wrong. I saw how big the sac was-I kept saying where's the baby? OMG, where??? he wouldnt answer. Then he saw the baby-and so did I. I was flipping out-I couldnt see a HB. The RE wasnt talking. I knew it, I know what a 7.5 week u/s should look like. The RE turned the screen so he could see better and took my HB and then said he was getting the other RE. She came in and I was sahaking hysterically. he showed her and she said "I wouldnt say miscarriage, however I would call this indeterminate". I SAID send me to a better machine!!!!
I was crying uncontrollably. The Re scheduled me to the radiology lab and was sooo kind. We had 2 hours to wait and i was told to drink water so we went to the store and i drank water and cried.
Went to the radiology and she did a regular u/s then vaginal. There was no HB-and she even listened for one. She said the baby died sometime within the week before the appt. the baby was CRL of only 6.5 weeks.
I went home and was told I could stop crinone and call in a week if nothing happened or he would schedule a D and C.
I talked to a friend and decided to call him back and ask for a D and C. he had me cal my OBGYN. They brought me in the next morning and the OB suggested the D and C for safety. he also said I could have another u/s or as many as I wanted.
We scheduled the D and C for the next morning with an u/s at the office first. This u/s was comforting because I had definitive proff the baby has passed so I had comfort knowing the D and C I was about to have was NOT an abortion
.
Let's just say I am NO LONGER PRO CHOICE! The baby I saw, even at 6w4d was a BABY! I couldnt imagine going through a D and C for a baby who has a heart beating! OMFG!
Why did this happen? Why did it take me 8 years to even get one positive and then end like this? Why do crack heads deliever their baies...I mean I know they are sick-but how do they survive in a hostile drug filled womb and mine didnt when I was taking such good care of it?
UGHHHHHHHHHH I am pissed off today