First of all, I just want to say that I am very sorry for your loss. What you are feeling is natural, and even if you hadn't had sexual feelings for her, the loss of a dear friend is something that still cuts us to the quick and causes us to rethink things in life.
Secondly, have you ever heard of polyamory? Polyamory is a term that is used to describe the ability to love more than one person at a time. It is possible to love your husband and to have loved/love your friend at the same time.
I think that you need to be completely honest with yourself and your husband. Tell him what you are feeling, and how much you are missing your friend. Go to counseling to help with the grieving process if you need to. If you really still feel the need to be with a woman, tell your husband that you are going to look for a girlfriend/female sexual partner. He doesn't need to be involved, but you need to be completely honest. If I were you, I wouldn't do anything rash, like divorce, just yet. It is possible that you are so hurt by the loss of your friend that you are not thinking clearly. Either way, I wish you luck.
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DBF (35)
TTC
My daily meds:
2000mg Metformin, 150 mcg Synthroid
1000 mg Fish Oils, Nature Made Multi for Her (with Iron and Calcium), Calcet triple calcium with vit d, 250 mg Magnesium, Bayer Aspirin, 500 mcg sublingual B-12
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