It was 2 years ago today.... (living children mentioned)
Sept 1st, 2005 is a day I'll never forget. I was 12 weeks pregnant with our first miracle baby. My mom was in town visiting and DH was stationed in Kuwait. My brother had been in town for the night and we had lunch with him before heading to my OB appointment. Life was good. The doctor tried to hear the heartbeat with the doppler but was not able to. No big deal. We had not been able to hear it yet by doppler. As soon as he put the wand on my belly though for the ultrasound I saw that there was not heartbeat or no movement. My world came crashing down. It's been 2 years but I still remember it like it was yesterday. I was bawling and all I could think about was telling DH who was so far away. Not the kind of thing you want to tell your spouse over the phone. I knew I had to though.
I can't believe it's been 2 years. As fresh as the pain is I'm very thankful for my 2 children (one that we're in the process of adopting and one by birth). It's rather ironic because Mady, DD, is 4 months older than our angel baby would have been. And of course whenever I get sad thinking about our angel baby I remind myself that if he'd lived then we wouldn't have Christian. Baby Dominique (the name we gave our angel - it means belonging to the Lord) is Mady and Christians' guardian angel.
My heart breaks for all of you that have had multiple losses and no living children. I just can't imagine the pain you live with. I pray that you all are blessed with children soon, whether it be by adoption or birth.
__________________ Adopted DD Maddy born 11/15/05 with us since 5/12/06 DS Christian born 10 wks early weighing 2 lbs 13 ozs 6/26/06 Angel baby 9/2005 @ 12 wks
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Going Crazy, were you due in February or March? I think I remember you. I was due with Eric at the same time.
Its just so sad that we all have lost a baby that we wanted so badly.
Yes, we were on the March due date thread together. I agree that it is very sad that we have all lost babies we wanted so badly.
__________________ Adopted DD Maddy born 11/15/05 with us since 5/12/06 DS Christian born 10 wks early weighing 2 lbs 13 ozs 6/26/06 Angel baby 9/2005 @ 12 wks
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I'm so sorry. Your story sounds so familiar. I was fortunate that DH was with me when we lost Jenna, but I reember that feeling of the world just caving in.
Everything went from being so happy (we were so excited about hearing the HB for the first time) to so tragically wrong.
It makes me so happy to hear that 2 years later, you have 2 beautiful children. It gives me hope.
Bekki - Thanks. Noone can imagine the pain we experience until they go through it themselves. As many people have said we've lost that innocence of pregnancy. I'm glad that my 2 kiddos have given you hope though! 2 years ago I never would have imagined my life would be like it is today. Things can change so quickly! Goodluck!
P.S. I notice you're on myspace. I sent you a friend request.
__________________ Adopted DD Maddy born 11/15/05 with us since 5/12/06 DS Christian born 10 wks early weighing 2 lbs 13 ozs 6/26/06 Angel baby 9/2005 @ 12 wks
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Bekki - Thanks. Noone can imagine the pain we experience until they go through it themselves. As many people have said we've lost that innocence of pregnancy. I'm glad that my 2 kiddos have given you hope though! 2 years ago I never would have imagined my life would be like it is today. Things can change so quickly! Goodluck!
P.S. I notice you're on myspace. I sent you a friend request.
I agree, you do lose the innocence. With my first pregnancy i was invincable...no doubt in my mind that the pregnancy would go on to a healthy baby. With pregnancy #2 i was nervous from day one...something just caused me to doubt. Now that I have had a M/C my future pregnancy (and there WILL be one, im determined!) will be constant worry.
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I'm with Sazzi... nothing could happen with baby #1 (Cole).. and then we got pregnant with Piselli and m/cd so when the next cycle we got pregnant again (with Hunter) it was nerve racking... then we got pregnant with Auggie and m/cd then when this baby came around, I was SUPER nervous about everything... I know I had early losses which are losses just the same but yet totally different then later losses but my heart does ache for everyone who has lost a child. it's terrible to think of even though I have 2 living children and a 3rd on the way... knowing I have 2 in heaven is just bit much to me.
goingcrazy-i know its wierd, but your 2 kids look alike in the pics you have in your siggy. do they look alike in person? they could definately pass for biological siblings!
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goingcrazy-i know its wierd, but your 2 kids look alike in the pics you have in your siggy. do they look alike in person? they could definately pass for biological siblings!
Everyone says that she could definately be our biological daughter! She really looks alot like one of my brothers. She fits in quite well. Here's a pic of her and my brother taken last year.
__________________ Adopted DD Maddy born 11/15/05 with us since 5/12/06 DS Christian born 10 wks early weighing 2 lbs 13 ozs 6/26/06 Angel baby 9/2005 @ 12 wks
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Yeah Steph, I remember it too. I found out about your mc the day after my d&c. It is crazy how fresh it is and how the memories just come flooding back. It was such a painful time and I questioned so much, especially my faith. Two years later and I have Brinley and a surprise baby on the way. You are busy with your two little ones, and life is good. I will always remember my angel and can't wait to meet him one day. Thinking about you girl!
wow, your dd does look like your brother!! where was he the night she was conceived?! j/k
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It was 2 years ago today.... (living children mentioned) 
It's been 2 years but I still remember it like it was yesterday. I was bawling and all I could think about was telling DH who was so far away. Not the kind of thing you want to tell your spouse over the phone. I knew I had to though. 
I just can't imagine the pain you live with. I pray that you all are blessed with children soon, whether it be by adoption or birth.
