Here's the story to go with the pictures.
As a child, I was normal weight and basically healthy. At the age of 11, I got my first AF. My mom couldn't believe it...it seemed awfully young to be hitting puberty. It seemed like from that point on, the weight gain train was pulling out of the station already.
As the years went by, I was gaining about 8-10 pounds a year, and it wasn't stopping. I was an active kid and teen, playing sports and eating some junk food, (like all kids do), but not enough of it to justify what was happening to me. The weight was still piling on. During the time I still lived at home, I endured the worst bullying from my own family about my weight. "Look at you...you're the fattest one in the family." "I'm embarrassed to go anywhere with you." "No one will want to go out with you or marry you looking like that." I couldn't even watch TV in peace. If a pig or an elephant came on, they'd say, "oh, look there's Tracey", and everyone would giggle (except me). I was eating the same food my family was, and even eating less than my sedentary parents, and I was heavier than all of them. All of my relatives are thin. By the time I was 15, I weighed 185 pounds. I went to Nutri-System to lose the weight. In the beginning, I lost 25 pounds very quickly, and I was looking really good, but then I hit a plateau that lasted for 2 months, even though I was following the diet religiously. This lead to even more nagging from my family..."oh, you're lying...you must be eating something on the side." After those two months, I got discouraged and gave up. The weight was all back on in 4 months, and was still coming. I felt so helpless as I watched my "skinny" jeans get tighter and tighter, and I couldn't stop it. In college, I brought new meaning to the "freshman 15"....I was still gaining, even though I had radically changed my eating habits. Over those years, I tried WW, Overeaters Anonymous, Nutri-System(again), and every crazy diet and diet pill known to man, in a desperate attempt to lose the weight. I starved myself, and took things that gave me palpitations, etc. I went to many doctors over the years, trying to find an answer to what was happening to me. I heard the same thing over and over. "you're just not trying", "be honest with yourself, buckle down and lose the weight." Some weren't even that kind, and some were frankly downright rude. Every one of them assumed I had diabetes, and I probably hold the world record for glucose and FBS testing with a negative result. I once went an entire month drinking nothing but water. I would exercise 5 days a week to a 1 hour workout video. I would follow diets religiously for months at a time and only lose 5 or 6 pounds. During all this time, my cycles were never regular. They were really heavy and the cramps were crippling. I went to a gyno about it, and was prescribed birth control pills. They didn't work, and they only added more weight.
Fast forward a few years.....I began to notice some other strange things...I was in my 30s, and still breaking out like a teenager. My hair on my head was falling out, and growing in places it shouldn't on a woman, and I could tell my BP was way too high. I felt slow and sluggish, like I was half asleep all the time. About 9 years ago, I just got so mad at myself, I figured, well, if I don't put it in my mouth, I won't gain it. So, for 9 years, I ate no breakfast, no lunch, no snacks, only a small dinner, and plenty of water. Even at this rate, I was still gaining about 3-5 pounds a year. I couldn't even maintain my weight doing this!!!!! Finally, I began to do some research on the net, and looked at a list of hypothyroid symptoms. Hmmmm...they sound a lot like me, and my mom and grandmom had thyroid problems. Could be....
I went to an idiot of a doctor in February of 2002. My weight was now at a staggering 298 pounds, and my blood pressure was 185/85, the highest it had ever been. I nearly cried....I was 36, I was too fat to get pregnant. I was running out of options and I was running out of time. I told Dr. Idiot my list of symptoms, and he says "oh, you're much too fat to have a thyroid problem." I told him how I was only eating one meal a day, and I get that well known "OH, SURE...." look.
Two sentences later in the same conversation, he says, "well, when I gain a few pounds, I just skip a meal or two." Okay, now I'm furious. I don't need anyone to lecture me about will power. I don't need pamphlets on eating healthy, and I don't need the condescending attitude. I NEED HELP! It was all I could do not to burst into tears waiting for the nurse to come take blood. I went home, in a major depression, and I didn't eat for three weeks. The tests, as always, came back normal. There was nothing wrong with me.
Over those three weeks, my friends goaded me into seeing an endo. I thought "What the hell for? So she can tell me I'm fat and lazy too?" Finally, I made the appointment, and I figured this...she'd tell me I just need to lose the weight. So, I'll just completely starve myself, and I'll either be thin, or I'll be dead. At the time, either option was okay with me.
I saw the endo, and my life was totally changed. I reluctantly told her my story, and for the first time, someone actually listened. She examined me, asked me a bunch of questions about AF and my fertility, did some tests, and said you have PCOS with insulin resistance, and there is something we can do about it. What???? I never heard of this. She said I probably had it since puberty. She handed me a scrip for metformin, and said if I followed a healthy diet and exercised, the weight would come off. "yeah, right, I saw that last night on an infomercial." I decided to humor her and take the pills. Once I knew that I was insulin resistant, I decided to go back on a diet that I had tried a year ago....the IR diet (I lost about 5 pounds in 4 months on that one). I waited a month to weigh myself, and found I had lost 10 pounds!!! By the end of December of 2002, I had lost a total of 105 pounds. That is one rule I have kept...I only weigh once a month, and I do not keep a scale in the house. I go to the local hospital waiting room and do it there. Well, here we are almost a year and a half later, and I have lost 134 pounds, I have 24 more to go, and I feel 100% better. My cycles are like clockwork, my BP is down, my hair is growing back, and my hirsutism is better. I still burst into tears, thinking about what an incredible miracle this is. For the first time in my life, I have been able to lose weight on my own. I have gone form a size 3x to an 8. I have not seen my family back in PA since August of last year, and that was about 90 pounds ago. So, I guess they will be surprised! After 24 years, I found hope, I found this site, and at long last, I found my health. This site has been invaluable to me for encouragement, support, and information. Well, that's my story, and I'm sticking to it!
There is hope, and I wish all of my cysters the best of health!!!
Here's my pics, just download the attachment in the post:
http://www.soulcysters.net/showthrea...threadid=43004