Hi all, it is I, the 42 year old mom who is shockingly pg and who is considering adopting to a cyster. DH and I were talking about finances, and we are not rich. Can anyone tell me what is customary for the birth mother to pay for during an adoption process? I do NOT want to profit from this, and I do NOT want the adoptive family to have to pay more than they need to, but I have NO clue how much I need to start saving. Thank heavens, in Quebec, I have free health care.
Hi, I've been following your story and I think what you're doing is so amazing. I really admire you. The cost will vary depending on what kind of adoption you have. If you go through an agency then the adoptive parents will pay an application fee, a homestudy fee, pay for your medical costs, travel, and legal fees. Or if you pick the family you want you could just go through an attorney for all the paperwork. In that case I believe the state would perform the homestudy and the adoptive parents would pay your medical expenses and travel costs. I think you mentioned on one of your posts that you wanted your baby to go to a family in the US and you're in Canada?
Have you thought about how you want to find a family?
__________________ Amy
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Actually, we are open to any family in Canada or the US, but we dont know if it is possible through the US without my actually moving there. I have a couple of prospective families, one right here on the message boards, and I am optimistic that my baby will find a terrific home and grow up happy and faithful! Thanks for your info!
I know that when my parents adopted my little brother the birth mother found us. There was no agency involved. And, I know that they paid V's (the birth mother) medical expenses... and she actually lived with us for a few months before he was born. I think, generally, the adoptive family pays for the medical expenses, at least - that's how I've always seen it done.
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Never forget the little things:
sunrises, sunsets, baby calves, and wild flowers.
Always have faith in God, yourself and the Cowboys. - Eddie Sutton
Well, the nice thing about living in Canada, my med is paid. That is a load off the mind of the host family, I am sure. Moving in with the family, well, that would be an option too, for a family in the US. Although waddling around the living room might be disruptive for the family!!
As far as I know, the birth mother from whom we are adopting has paid nothing. Our agency doesn't charge birth mothers anything for the services, and she is on public assistance that covers her prenatal visits and such. But of course it varies case by case!
__________________ Me (31), DH (38)
Proud parents of two Chihuahuas
Dx October 2005, TTC October 2005 to April 2008, O'd on Clomid but no BFP's.
Adopting domestically, homestudy and profile done October 2008!
Matched with a birth mother January 2009, she changed her mind the day the baby was born, March 10, 2009. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Chalking it up to a learning experience and waiting for another match!
Amberlyn - whoa... reading your sig is like deja vu, you're situation is basically identical to a girl I talk to on another website ... but her BM's EDD is March 1th.... friggin weird!! lol
Jael - Canada is so much different from the US, and every province being different, I'd say go on a few different adoption websites, join groups (i know yahoo has a few) and see if anyone has been in the same situation, in QB as you... that may be the easiest way to find the info you're looking for..
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Heather (27) To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Steve (29)
On a TTC Break after 3.5 years
Hubby has hyperthyroidism, with T4 at 85 (normal 22) and T3 at 35 (normal 6.5)
July 2009 - Radio Active Iodine - Failed. Did not kill off enough thyroid.
I found a list of support groups for all provinces, there are quite a few in Quebec. Due to my limited french I'm unable to understand which one may be best suited
Thanks Safyre! To tell the truth, I think it might be difficult to find a famly here in Quebec, because of the faith issues. Here, you are either French Catholic, or , um, well, that is it. And since the *quiet revolution* almost no one is serious about their faith. It is very important to me that my baby is raised in a home with a strong faith ethic.
No, not really. For the most part, I am open to a afamily, rather than a region. I am from Alaska, my husband from Florida, heaven only knows what kind of climate this baby will prefer!
Jael - I think you mis-read Amy's question. She was asking if there was a specific RELIGION that you wanted the baby raised in, not 'region'.
Are you looking for catholic? protestant? christian?
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Heather (27) To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Steve (29)
On a TTC Break after 3.5 years
Hubby has hyperthyroidism, with T4 at 85 (normal 22) and T3 at 35 (normal 6.5)
July 2009 - Radio Active Iodine - Failed. Did not kill off enough thyroid.
hun we went through an open adoption and I don't know if it is a BC law or all over canada but you have to go threw an agency no matter what. Our BM was a friend of the family so we did all the work. But the family that is receiving the child still needs to have a homestudy done and jump threw the hoops of the agency's.
Your best bet would be to phone a lawyer and ask what the laws are. We both us and the birth family had to sign papers saying that we were NOT paying the BM for the baby in any way shape or form.
So call a lawyer find out the laws. You could find your self a new adoptive family but they will still have to pay for it, but maybe not to you. Since we canadians do not pay for health care it is different then in the states.
__________________ Jodi
me 30 dh 36
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Had Emmarie due to an Incompetant cervix at 16w4days
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Whoopsie, you are right, I must have been tired (since I have not been drinking coffee!). Well, it more depends on the devotion of the family, but I would prefer protestant. I am Baptist, and those tenets are very dear to me.
Wow .. you are an amazing person !
I know you will find the perfect family for your child.
Are you considering an open adoption ? I am curious as both my children have very slim chances of finding their birth parents and I wonder what it would be like to raise a child with birth mom involvement. I would actually welcome it ! LOL
Thanks and take care
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Amy (34) To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. DH (36)
DS (7) To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. DD (3)
Oct 09 - Femara 5mgs Days 3-7 BFN
Nov 09 - Femara 5mgs Days 3-7
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Adoption Finances 
