Hi Guys,
I'm new to this forum. I have been lurking for awhile trying to get a feel for this place. I enjoy reading what you've all written. And, I have to say, I've learned a few things too.
I was just wondering about something. I was reading the TTC threads (Okay, I admit, I had no idea what TTC meant, but I soon figured it out!)
For all those couples who want children so badly, is adoption completely out of the question?
My partner and I have been together 19 years. About 6 years ago, we started to talk about kids. Since I have PCOS, I knew it wasn't likely going to be me who carried a baby. My partner, had no real desire to be pregnant. We never really considered adoption, thinking that CFS would never even consider a gay couple. But, I called CFS and they said that they have several gay adoptive parents.
We started the endless amount of paperwork. We went to the necessary 3 month training courses, had our lives examined by social workers, and were in the middle of our home study when we got a call about a little boy. We had requested a boy, beacuse both me and my partner are not girly girls, so I knew we'd relate better to a boy. (How could I teach a daughter how to be a girl???) We also requested a toddler, because neither of us felt we could deal with sleepless nights, and diapers.
The result: Within about 6 months of applying, we got a beautiful 5 year old boy! He has my dark hair, and my partners blue eyes. He had been in an abusive home, and was taken away from his birth family at 2 1/2. Because he wasn't a "BABY" no one was breaking down doors to adopt him. Everyone wants the perfect baby. What's wrong with a toddler?
Now, fast forward 5 years, and our son is 10 1/2, healthy & strong! He has been brought up to be accepting of others differences, and is a great little kid. He plays basketball, baseball, has a yellow belt in Tae Kwon Do, and does Ukrainian Dancing. He is my best friend at times, we go fishing and camping together, shoot baskets together, play video games together and yet, I am his parent when I need to be.
I'm rambling. What I guess I want to say is: I understand the need some feel to be pregnant, and give birth. But I also see the heartache you guys experience when conception fails. Reading some of it, my heart ached for some of you. But please don't underestimate the happiness you can get by considering adoption. It's a decision I'm glad we considered.
IMHO.
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I would love to consider adoption and think it is a wonderful thing. It is just something on our income we can't afford.
Yes, adoption is very expensive, My sister was told she'd never be able to have kids, she looked into adoption but couldn't afford it... Sucks there are so many kids out there needing homes, but yet the people that want to give them a good one, can't due to their income.
Now, fast forward 5 years, and our son is 10 1/2, healthy & strong! He has been brought up to be accepting of others differences, and is a great little kid. He plays basketball, baseball, has a yellow belt in Tae Kwon Do, and does Ukrainian Dancing. He is my best friend at times, we go fishing and camping together, shoot baskets together, play video games together and yet, I am his parent when I need to be.
That's great! I hope whenever i have a kid (Or adopt) that i can have that kind of parent/friend relationship with them!
Wow - I guess it must cost alot in the Staes. It didn't really cost us anything, except blood, sweat, tears and time. Unless you count the paint needed to turn our office into a kid's bedroom. I'm feeling pretty lucky!
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Adoption...is it an option? 
