I did not at all think that you were slamming birthmothers, and I wasn't trying to defend her. I really just wanted to give you some insight into how I felt that might perhaps help you in the future. Thank you for sharing your story. I'm sorry that the birthmother was not upfront with you and the agency. It sounds like she could have definitely done a lot of things differently. I am glad that you are not bitter towards future birthmoms, and I pray that you will have a little one in your arms soon.
Best wishes,
Stacy
__________________ Stacy, Daisy Lover To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. and Crossfit Addict Age 31 DH Age 39
Mom to Stormy Age 6 Stepmom to Brian Age 7 Birthmom to Madeline Age 8
TTC as soon as I start ovulating!
My first two pregnancies were a "fluke" according to my doctor because I had lost a ton of weight right before both times. I never knew that I didn't ovulate until diagnosis in February of 2008.
I just wanted to say a quick hello to all those who are joining us!
Amber-I cannot believe that this has happened to you. I am very sorry. It is exciting to see what is up next for you though.
__________________ Erin(25) To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. DH(25) Homestudy finalized 2-9-09! We have been matched and are waiting on the arrival of our little boy in January!!! To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
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Welcome Jilly and Carolina Girl! I think it is so cool for us to have a thread for expecting adoptive moms. I still communicate with friends on the TTCing threads but it's nice to hang out with others who are going through a different but equally exciting (and sometimes heartbreaking and frustrating!) experiences.
Amberlyn-- What an incredibly painful story... I´m amazed by your positive attitude. Still, give yourself time to grieve because you have suffered a loss... I hope you and DH will take some time out together to do special activities that you enjoy and renew the hope. Your story is a reminder of how difficult it is for those birth moms to give up their babies, and how unpredictable the process of adoption can be. Sending you positive vibes +++++ for a positive outcome on the next round.
Stacy-- Thanks so much for sharing your perspective!!! It is so important for us to remember the special people that birth moms are and how hard it is for them to hand over their precious baby... Hugs!!!
Sam--I know that May can't come soon enough for you! We started the process in August and weren't approved until March. I pretty much distracted myself with work during that time... but boy oh boy, did it drag on. Worth it though... keeping my fingers and toes crossed for you!
AFM--Well, those of us waiting don't seem to have the constant need to post like the ladies TTCing... ha, ha... we don't have to analyze every cramp and how sore our boobs are or if we think AF is arriving or not. Still, I love the fact that Stacy posted and we got a conversation going there about what birthmoms go through! Important food for thought...
Thanks for the support, ladies. I hope I can reciprocate. I love this forum and am so thankful to have found it!!
__________________ Me (31), DH (38)
Proud parents of two Chihuahuas
Dx October 2005, TTC October 2005 to April 2008, O'd on Clomid but no BFP's.
Adopting domestically, homestudy and profile done October 2008!
Matched with a birth mother January 2009, she changed her mind the day the baby was born, March 10, 2009. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Chalking it up to a learning experience and waiting for another match!
kimmy-ki - I have to agree as heart breaking as it is to now know I will never be pregnant and get to experience that......man ttc is not fun!!!! I hated the analyzing every little twinge!
And so many things that we put off as we were always mid cycle, or spending our money on fert meds.
To signify the end of a hard journey and celebrate the beginning of a new and exciting one my husband and I and a couple we are very close with and have been there for us along the way are all going on a trip to Cuba next month! I am so excited! We haven't been away before and always put it off due to ttc.......Coudln't be a better time to go away and let loose! As I'm sure you know, you really need it after 4 years of ttc heart break.
Then when we return we will start our adoption journey, I am confident that this journey will have a happy ending, I'm sure there will be bumps along the road.....but I see a light at the end of this tunnel, I hope all you ladies do too!!!!
Glad to have you to share with while we wait to be Mommies!!!
__________________ ttc 3.5 years Me-PCOS Hubby-Male Factor IVF#1 BFP, misc To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
FET#1 BFN FET#2 BFN IUI#1 (with donor) Clomid, cycle canc. IUI#2 Gonal F-BFN IUI#3 Gonal F-BFN HSG - All Clear! IUI#4 Gonal F - BFN No Longer TTC
Hoping to start our Home Study soon - Going the Private Domestic route. 3 Fur Babies, that I couldn't live without To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
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Kimmy-I am so happy to not be ttc any longer. It is funny thinking back at everything that we went through each month. Even now I find myself checking when I go to the bathroom and say why did I just do that?!
Sam-Your trip sounds exciting and well deserved! You should have a wonderful time in Cuba. I know what you mean about putting off trips and different thing because of what was going on with my cycle. It makes things hard.
AFM-I just called my adoption agency and they said they finally have some action on the baby front. She said birthmothers come in waves. She will be showing our profile for the first time on Monday! I am going to call on Wednesday to get some info on the girl. Even though she will not know who she is going to choose by then and she might not even like us. I would just like to know if we are a possibility. I think!
__________________ Erin(25) To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. DH(25) Homestudy finalized 2-9-09! We have been matched and are waiting on the arrival of our little boy in January!!! To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
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__________________ ttc 3.5 years Me-PCOS Hubby-Male Factor IVF#1 BFP, misc To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
FET#1 BFN FET#2 BFN IUI#1 (with donor) Clomid, cycle canc. IUI#2 Gonal F-BFN IUI#3 Gonal F-BFN HSG - All Clear! IUI#4 Gonal F - BFN No Longer TTC
Hoping to start our Home Study soon - Going the Private Domestic route. 3 Fur Babies, that I couldn't live without To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
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Yea, Erin. That is exciting. I am very glad to hear that there are birth mothers that will be looking at your profile soon.
I have been lurking here because I just feel that DH & I are meant to join you here very soon. One more week of bcp, then another month of injections and I'm ready to move on. I'm tired of TTC. I have been so much more like myself this month on bcp, and it's been a nice change. I want to be rid of TTC forever, so I can be me again. Not that I think adoption will necessarily be an easy road, but I've had enough of constantly wondering what my body is doing and why if I ovulate so many times I don't get pregnant.
Anyway, just introducing myself. You ladies are in my thoughts and prayers!
__________________ Christy (29) & Jeremy (32)
DD (5/27/04) - second cycle 50mg clomid
DS (11/10/09) - first cycle Menopur (150 - 225 IU), metformin 1700mg
Sam-- CUBA!!! WOW!!! I have always wanted to go there. What a wonderful idea to get away. Do you like Latin dancing by any chance? If so, you and DH should dance those sultry Cuban nights away... If not, it would be fun just to watch the Cubanos-- they certainly know how to move! Keep us posted on your adventures.
Erin-- HOW EXCITING that you are getting some action on the baby font!!!! I´ll send super positive vibes up north that you and DH get picked soon!!! KEEP US POSTED!!!! PS How funny you are still checking when you go to the bathroom, and then thinking... oops, what´s up with that?!?! With TTCing, it all just becomes automatic. I just had another m/c and the great thing is that I don't even care when or how my period is going to come back. Nice to be able to just let my body take care of things without my noisy mind interfering!!!!
Tristas-- Welcome! I used to love taking breaks from TTCing because it was like remembering how to enjoy life again! Actually, that's the greatest part about adoption... you can go on a permanent TTC break and not be depressed about it! Anyway, good luck with your next injection cycle--sending +++++ vibes your way...
__________________ Kimmy-Ki
TTCing since 4/04--now 40 & fab!
2 precious angels: 1/07--"Faith" m/c 6.5 weeks;
2/09--m/c 8.5 weeks
3/09--Accepted for adoption
4/5/09--Surprise BFP after D & C! Lovenox for APA
6/16/09--It's a beautiful boy! To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
"Ask for what you want and be prepared to get it."
--Maya Angelou
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Update: Today we received the documents from the court that state that we have met the legal requirements to adopt a child here in Mexico!!! The agency had already told us that we had been accepted but now it's legally a fact... or, in other words, we're REALLY pregnant now!!! The agency has now clarified that they will place a child with us between the ages of 2 - 5. We have always been open to adopting a slightly older child, so we are more than thrilled!!!! I have a feeling that things will move quickly because we are not waiting for a baby, which takes a long time here in Mexico.
__________________ Kimmy-Ki
TTCing since 4/04--now 40 & fab!
2 precious angels: 1/07--"Faith" m/c 6.5 weeks;
2/09--m/c 8.5 weeks
3/09--Accepted for adoption
4/5/09--Surprise BFP after D & C! Lovenox for APA
6/16/09--It's a beautiful boy! To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
"Ask for what you want and be prepared to get it."
--Maya Angelou
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Kimmy-WOW that is so exciting!! I am so happy for you. You will be a Mommy in no time. Since you will be getting an older child are you going to give him/her a new name? Do you have any idea as to a time frame?
Christy-It is nice to see you here!
__________________ Erin(25) To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. DH(25) Homestudy finalized 2-9-09! We have been matched and are waiting on the arrival of our little boy in January!!! To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
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That's really exciting Kimmy! I hope it does move quickly for you!
__________________ ttc 3.5 years Me-PCOS Hubby-Male Factor IVF#1 BFP, misc To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
FET#1 BFN FET#2 BFN IUI#1 (with donor) Clomid, cycle canc. IUI#2 Gonal F-BFN IUI#3 Gonal F-BFN HSG - All Clear! IUI#4 Gonal F - BFN No Longer TTC
Hoping to start our Home Study soon - Going the Private Domestic route. 3 Fur Babies, that I couldn't live without To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
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Erin-- We asked about names. Legally we would have the right to choose his/her new first name. (In Mexico, by law the child automatically will have new last names--first DH's last name and then mine.) It's quite a different case from a two year-old to a five year-old! With older kids, the agency told us that it is best to work with the child and see how he/she adapts to the idea. They said that many kids are open to having a new name (it can start out as a nickname, and if he/she likes it, then it can stick!) We're really going to go with the flow... As I mentioned before, we have our names picked out but we will do whatever is best for kiddo!
Sam--Thanks! I hope it moves quickly too!
__________________ Kimmy-Ki
TTCing since 4/04--now 40 & fab!
2 precious angels: 1/07--"Faith" m/c 6.5 weeks;
2/09--m/c 8.5 weeks
3/09--Accepted for adoption
4/5/09--Surprise BFP after D & C! Lovenox for APA
6/16/09--It's a beautiful boy! To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
"Ask for what you want and be prepared to get it."
--Maya Angelou
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I'm in VERY new to the process but I think it would be wonderful to have your support. We've just been put on the wait list to do step 1 of what feels like 4000 here in Ontario, Canada... I really don't even know for sure what's in store but I'm glad we're taking the first steps.
I'm not yet ready to be happy about not being able to TTC but I am really hopeful at the thought that YES, we will eventually have a baby to call our own.
I haven't shared our decision with any of our friends/family yet... none of them even know that I can't get pg... Have you all shared your decision to adopt? How did you go about telling everyone? Was it a positive experience? I'd love to hear about it.
Looking forward to getting to know all of you
Happy Friday!
__________________
Moi: Kelly - 29
1996: Dx PCOS & IR
TTC #1: Nov 2007 - 6 cycles (3 Natural, 3 w/ Femara) all BUST
May 2008: Dx Premature Ovarian Failure. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
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March 2009: Adoption process begun!
July 2009: HRT for menopause
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I would love to join you all in the waiting game. We just got our home study approved yesterday (the 26th) for 2 siblings between the ages of 0 and 10. We are NOT waiting for an infant so our case worker says we could move quickly. Our worker said that now we just wait for her to call us with news on a group that will fit with our family.
Congrats Kimmy-Ki
__________________ Shelly 30 DH-Rey 31
Diagnosed November 2002
1500mg Metformin
Mother of two beautiful children. The Princess Talia Jean is 4 1/2 years old and our Prince Maxwell is 3 years old.
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Starting the adoption process 6/2008
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Keep us posted on your adventures.
The agency has now clarified that they will place a child with us between the ages of 2 - 5. We have always been open to adopting a slightly older child, so we are more than thrilled!!!! I have a feeling that things will move quickly because we are not waiting for a baby, which takes a long time here in Mexico.
