Alone (on anxiety)

graceking · 02-07-2008, 06:59 PM

Alone

Torn, tattered,
Empty, alone,
dead?
No, not quite
dead -
yet.

For hope is
lost.
The battle's over,
The enemy's won.
What now?

I lie here,
a stranger in
my
own
world:
listless, empty,
and completely,
utterly

alone.

How can you win when
you fight yourself, when
the enemy shares
your very
soul?
Oppressor and oppressed,
Victimizer and victim-
we are all one and the same, and
therein lies the rub.

I cannot breathe.

I cannot feel,
cannot hope, dream,
pray, wish,
love, hate, think,
be!

This is too much.

Optimists would say,
"Maybe someday -"

I am no optimist.
I am no fool.
Optimists are rare,
their "somedays"
even more so.

And yet -

And yet...

dillydaydreams · 02-10-2008, 04:30 PM

Social anxiety Disorder!
Please get help for that first, as if you don't get help for that it will be very difficult for you to deal with everything else. I suffer severe panic attacks. I now take 2 tranquillizers a day and I am much better. They are a low dose of centrax to be precise and without them I'd be locked indoors, not even answering the phone. It is horrible, I let it get out of hand as was ashamed to tell my doctor. I have alot of other issues too but at least one of them can be sorted. I can now function normally. I also have M.E. which is very debiltating also. Have full blown PCOS all the symptoms, plus endometriosis, and IBS, so I believe if there is a way of fixing something I do what is necessary.
1. The hair electrolysis, waxing etc
2. The weight gain currently seeing a dietician re insulin resistance.
3. Hormones hoping diet will help
4 Anxiety take 2 x centrax a day
5 endometriosis pain killers where necessary.
6. M.E. I have accepted my illness and do whatever I can when I can.
7 IBS diet is helping with that.
Sorry if this is longwinded but trying to explain how I'm dealing with it.
I'm om 500mg metformin also.
Good luck with everything x

graceking · 02-10-2008, 11:41 PM

I am being treated for the social anxiety disorder stuff, don't worry. Poetry is just a way for me to release some of my pent-up emotion. And thanks for the input, its always interesting to know how other people deal with this kind of thing. Good luck yourself!