I am going through a really tough time right now. I thought I would ask all of you what it was like for you going through a miscarriage. It looks like I have a blighted ovum and will be miscarrying. My hcg levels are around 2000 and I am almost 7 weeks. I haven't started to miscarry yet but I am very firghtened and exhausted from all the tests and bad news I have been given.
My question is:
Is it wrong of me not to want to go see friends and family?
My mom is a very supportive person but it seems that I can't find the energy in me to go spend the day with her. I don't know when I will be up to going out for the day again. I feel like I will only feel better when I can TTC again.
I read that a lot of women going through miscarriages find it is easier spending time with family and friends but I am the complete opposite.
I can't even talk on the phone and the thought of going out to the mall or lunch is just exhausting and upsetting. All I want to do is stay inside with Dh and watch movies and be with him (nobody else).
Is this wrong to feel like this? Anyone else feel like this?
__________________ Me (26) DH (26)
4 Failed IUI's
November 2006 - IVF #1 - BFN
January 2007 IVF #2 - BFN
March 2007 IVF #3 - BFP Blighted Ovum To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
June 2007 IVF #4 - BFP! Due March 25, 2008!
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No, its perfectly fine! You are going through a very traumatic time in your life, and you have the RIGHT to mourn! When people mourn, they don't normally want to be around a whole lot of people, it takes time with your spouse, a good friend or sometimes on your own, to get to the point your ready for others to be around. Your perfectly normal!
I am terribly sorry things are so crazy, I pray that things are just fine and that everything gets better! **HUGS**
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On a TTC break...
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Second, I feel the EXACT SAME WAY right now. DH was sweet and tried to make arrangements for my mom to come visit for a couple days, but I really don't want that right now. I don't want to be surrounded by "oohh"s and "aawww"s and hugs and stuff. Nope, nope, nope. I just want to be at home with DH.
I totally agree with the others, and I'm so sorry for your loss! This is a very very hard time for you, and you should be gentle to yourself. Let the feelings of grief flow for a while, and there will be some better days soon. Just be honest with everyone, and though they won't understand, it's hard to be insistent when someone opens up and says, "I can't bear the thought of seeing people being happy when I feel so sad right now." Something like that. I needed a safe place when my grief was fresh, too. Please take the time you need, and if you think there is something more going on like possible depression, mention it to your doctor. These early days are a lot like depression, though, so just cope as well as you can. (((Hugs)))
__________________ Metformin 1500mg, Yasmin, managing IR/pcos with lower carbs
First pregnancy ended at 23 weeks due to incompetent cervix.
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Mary Catherine will be in our hearts forever, November 28, 2003.
Second loss March 9, 2004 at five weeks
Third pregnancy, Cerclage at 13w
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Fourth pregnancy, Cerclage at 13w
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Everyone handles things differently... I think at this stage, it is too early to say that how you choose to handle it is right or wrong. I mean, barring obviously alarming behavior like contemplating jumping off of bridges or so on...
I am right there with you with not wanting to deal with family. My family all lives far away so luckily, or not, I don't have to face them in person... but like, my brother is having a lot of marital issues now, and I have to hear all about it from my father, and every time my father calls I want to hide under the bed. It's just like right now, I need to be wrapped up in my own little world right now. I don't have an ounce of mental capacity to offer up to anyone else's issues right now. My own problems are quite enough.
I don't think it's right or wrong to want to be left alone. We all handle it as we see fit.
And I'm sorry it didn't work out for you, either.
__________________ DS b. 11/16/03 To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
DDs b. 3/28/08 To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. X2
"We've tried to wash our hands of all of this
We never talk of our lacking relationships
And how we're guilt-stricken, sobbing, with our heads on the floor
We fell through the ice when we tried not to slip..."
- the verve pipe
Everyone handles things differently... I think at this stage, it is too early to say that how you choose to handle it is right or wrong.
Every person has their own unique way of handling grief, and that's just the way it is. If it feels "right" to stick to yourself for a few days or weeks, then that is what you should do.
I'm sorry for what you are going through right now.
I understand how you feel. Just got the verdict today that our pregnancy is not viable. I feel like I can tell my friends, but am not ready to tell parents yet. It woudl break their hearts to know that, but I feel like the support would actually be too much or intense for me right now. Anyway, I feel your pain.
Am I wrong to feel this way? 
