mahjab

I went to get my legs waxed by an east Asian lady and she kept commenting on how much hair I had and how she had none. I felt really bad! I'm nervous to go to a salon now...has anyone had an experience like this? I'm already so self concious about the hair on my legs and I almost started crying there. the owner was really obnoxious too

GlitterStar

I'm in Sacramento and formerly lived in St. Louis and both places were full of Asian owned salons and I've had comments made to me before by them as well. I don't think they do it to purposely be rude, I think it's just a culture thing and they don't understand that in the U.S. some of the remarks they make are hurtful and callous. I went in to get a manicure once and one of the other employee walks past me and says "ahhhh, you look like you need face wax, you want?". I had the same reaction as you, I was a little hurt and then self conscious but when I had time to calm down and think about it and pay attention to how they treated and interacted with other customers I think they are like any other business and that means trying to make a sale. Unfortunately the way they do it doesn't fit into our culture all the time.

I still go to Asian salons because they are more affordable and I've found they do a good job and the lady that does my eyebrows knows about my hair loss and has seen it ...it was a total accident, she went to pull my bangs back not realizing it was a wig and it slipped back before I could stop it. She didn't say a word or make a comment or look shocked at all. She did my brows and still does them for me every month. I've been to American salons when I first started losing my hair before I went to wearing wigs and had some just down right callous and ignorant *****es making jokes and tell me that they couldn't do anything with it. The difference was they knew that was rude and hurtful but did it anyway.

So I wouldn't worry about it too much but if you're uncomfortable there, go somewhere else. There's far too many salons to choose from to continue going somewhere that makes you leave in tears.

mahjab

Thank you. Well I was thinking the same thing...that maybe it was just a cultural thing because she was kind of nice in other ways...I guess. Also east asians seem to have no body hair whatsoever...so it must have been really weird for her to see. But I have gone to another east asian lady and she was really nice.

joyblack

They probably have a mainly-Asian clientele so don't necessarily realize the tremendous difference between what's normal for American Caucasians and what's normal for most Asians.

Asians from outwith the Indian sub-continent have very little facial and body hair -- even the males. Most of the women have little or no leg hair and it's very unusual for the women to have moustache or beard growth. (On the other hand, women from the Indian sub-continent normally have significant leg hair and most have moustache and sideburn growth.)

It must be quite a shock for those who have been in close personal contact only with Asians from outwith the Indian sub-continent to be confronted with the reality of most Americans of Caucasian origin and discover that the women who don't have leg hair are the exception rather than the rule and some moustache growth is regarded as normal.

There is a considerable variation in those things between different ethnic backgrounds. The typical Caucasian-American woman is hairier in terms of leg/moustache/beard growth than a pure-bred native-American Indian male and has almost as much as the typical Asian male from outwith the Indian sub-continent.

I think it may have been a reaction of surprise and a lack of cultural awareness and sensitivity on her part that led to her comments. Another
woman with more cross-cultural experience and sensitivity would have avoided such comments. Hair is only part of the story. It would be a very insensitive Caucasian American who would comment on the fact that a great many Asian women have no obvious breasts and few have anything larger than A cups, though that's also a fact of life. What we're used to is not always what's expected by people from a different background.

xtori

I had an experience very close to Glitterstars. The owner said I needed a face wax during a manicure. I was so shocked, I almost starting crying right then and there and I also ignored her. She must've repeated 15 times the need for my face to be waxed. She was very loud and in a crowded salon, it drew many looks. I was mortified!! I never returned to that salon but have been to others. Usually my hair is under control but if it's been a week or so, it's noticeable but no one has said anything since.

__________________


To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

nurse_cyster

I went to have my brows and moustache taken care of once and the lady said, "Boy your face is hairy, I wax for you", before I could say or do anything she slathered wax all across my cheeks and jawline and almost to my ears and "sideburn" area, (all I have is peachfuzz on my face), she took all my fuzz off and probably a week later where she waxed, my face was full of little whiteheads from the waxjob, d*mn I was mad. Of course, she was practically hair-less on her face/arms, it's a cultural thing.

__________________
me-Rita (25) DH Jose (29)
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

dx PCOS at 16/dx IR 8/2008
TTC since 2006
11/08 IVF cycle #1 -BFN
06/09 IVF cycle #2-BFN
11 embryos waiting on ice!



To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Rita
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.