Bipolar Disorder.... I'm so confused!

missmelanie23 · 07-13-2009, 04:31 PM

A little over a year ago, I posted in this section following a break up and thoughts of suicide. Ever since then, those who I have spoken too (friends, counsellors and my doctor) suggested I could be bipolar.

The last year has been nothing but a rollercoaster. I was reduced the amount of effexor i had to take, I was given Epival (which didn't work) and was switched to a low does of Lithium (600mg daily). On top of it all, I've moved 3 times, stopped drinking alcohol - although not completely but now I keep it to social gathers, which I avoid like the plague, so long story short, I rarely drink now.. however I have taken up a really bad smoking habit, and I'm not talking just cigarettes here....

Anyway, so with that in mind, I finally got my diagnosis on July 10th/09. The psychiatrist told me "yup you're bipolar", so I asked "ok what now?" She said... I'm just confirming their suspicion. She didn't go into details as to what it involves exactly. In fact, how the heck can they diagnose with a 2 hour appointment?

It could be that I'm in denial, as a matter of fact, I know I am... but come on, 2 hours to say i'm bipolar? I'm sure you can understand why I'm a little reluctant to believe this. Now question is... which bipolar? BP1, BP2 or rapidcycling?

No matter what I read on bipolar disorder, those seem to be the 3 main categories... To me, they all seem so familiar with very little difference that I have no clue which one I fit in. I'm bipolar, yah but what type? heh

If someone could take the time to clarify, that'd be great. I'd also love to know the experiences you've had with being bipolar and having PCOS. How can you tell the difference between a bipolar moment or an hormonal moment? To me, those moods swings seem pretty identical.. So how will I know what my triggers or where I'm at in the bipolar cycle of depression or manic?

UGH. Sorry for the long post. Just looking for clarification.

ivetastedflight · 07-13-2009, 05:10 PM

How long do you feel it should take to make an adequate diagnosis? I think 2 hours is pretty thourogh.

There is a diagnosis of Bipolar Disorder - NOS (not otherwise specified), which you may have received. It may mean that you clearly have bipolar disorder, but it is unclear which "type"; I've found that it doesn't matter much, the treatment is the same. If you're like most BP patients, you may never really know what your triggers are, or where in a cycle you are (which is extremely difficult anyway, since the lengths of the cycles vary from episode to episode), and there are SO MANY VARIABLES. Also, often times, you won't even know you're in a specific cycle until after it's over, and you look back on it and go, "Whoa. I was really up over the moon last week, huh?" My husband can tell where I am before I can - every time.

As far as having BP and PCOS, I don't try to figure out which is which. I just get treatment for each of the respective disorders and I haven't ever needed to know which was which. I guess I'm probably not a good compass for this question: PCOS has been a pleasant stroll on the beach at sunset compared to Bipolar Disorder.

thebluefox22 · 07-13-2009, 06:39 PM

I think that many of the mood swings and hormonal imbalances that go along with having PCOS can look a lot like Bipolar Disorder. I would be very careful about finding a very knowledgable MD, psychatrist, or psychologist to take the time to diagnose you. Your behavior should really be tracked and observed over the course of several months. The fact that you are "smoking" also complicates the diagnosis with addiction because it will be hard to determine your moods off drugs. I am not saying it is incorrect, I am only saying that is very healthy to be weary. My advice is to seek as many opinons as it takes until you feel comfortable that you have been diagnosed AND TREATED appropriately.

I know that it is a common occurence for women to be diagnosed as Bipolar and PCOS. Is it a correct diagnosis? That's a whole different ball of wax. People are misdiagnosed everyday! I would think the mood swings (both highs and lows) would be more extreme than if it was just a "PCOS moment." If they diagnosed you and put you on meds my advice to you would be to try them, but be careful to track how you are feeling on them (on a daily basis if you can).

I know how frustrating it is for someone to diagnose you and then give you no information about where to go from there. But you really have to do your own research and be your own advocate to get anywhere in life. I really wish you the best of luck and hope this helps even a little bit.

MissC23 · 07-14-2009, 12:28 AM

I have a minor in psychology (I'm no doctor here.. not trying to say I am) but my question for you is, did you tell the doctors about your smoking habit and your PCOS? If you have received many opinions from doctors and friends saying that you could possibly be bipolar, this may easily be the case. However, its almost impossible to get an accurate diagnosis until 1) your hormones are under control and 2) you are off drugs. This may come as a surprise, but many of the effects of drug use are almost the exact same as symptoms of mental disorders. One of the most serious and misdiagnosed mental disorders is schizophrenia. Heavy drug use can seem like it a lot of the time.

I have actually been in your situation before. I was diagnosed as bipolar when I was 14 years old. I was put on a ton of medication (always changing, because they couldn't find anything that "worked") and nothing ever helped. By the time I was 20 my other symtoms just didn't add up. Hair, irregular periods, and skin problems accompanied the mood swings. Oh, and I was smoking pot all the time. Once the smoke cleared and I got an accurate diagnosis and my hormones under control they tested me again, and I had a bit of depression but not bipolar.

What I am basically saying is that if you are serious about getting your mental health issues under control, stop with the drugs and get your hormones under control first. Hormone levels can be tested by a doctor. Only then can you get a real diagnosis. Best of luck to you! I know I went through hell before I got it all sorted out.

missmelanie23 · 07-14-2009, 01:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MissC23

I have a minor in psychology (I'm no doctor here.. not trying to say I am) but my question for you is, did you tell the doctors about your smoking habit and your PCOS? If you have received many opinions from doctors and friends saying that you could possibly be bipolar, this may easily be the case. However, its almost impossible to get an accurate diagnosis until 1) your hormones are under control and 2) you are off drugs. This may come as a surprise, but many of the effects of drug use are almost the exact same as symptoms of mental disorders. One of the most serious and misdiagnosed mental disorders is schizophrenia. Heavy drug use can seem like it a lot of the time.

I have been very honest with the counsellors and doctors I have seen thus far. Each know about my PCOS and my smoking habits. I have stuck to one drug and I refuse to try anything else for fear of getting addicted. Just because I do smoke, doesn't mean I'm addicted to it. I can go without for long periods at a time. The only reason I do smoke is because it relaxes me and it also makes to racing thoughts go away long enough for me ease up...
I know there are no excuses for it... but at least I am honest as to what I do and why when it comes to that.

I'm just overwhelmed with it all. A friend of mine, who's also a psych nurse, and I have been discussing this possibility for over a year now, yet I am still in shock - I was fine accepting it while it was a possibility but now that its real, it just doesn't feel right.

Quote:

How long do you feel it should take to make an adequate diagnosis?

To answer this question, I just figured that it would take more than 1 two-hour appointment to come to a conclusion. Lord knows any hypochondriac could say anything to get a diagnosis if they believe they have a certain disorder or disease right? Shouldn't there be at least a few appointments before concluding? I mean how can they reach a diagnosis with simply what I said. What about my behavior? Words are one thing but the way a person acts from appointment to appointment, I assume, would also help in a proper diagnosis. Not just 2 hours worth of questions and answers.

Not sure if this makes any sense. My head is all over the place right now.

jssgirl · 07-29-2009, 02:50 AM

My Therapist diagnosed me within 2 1 hour appts about 7 years ago. I was confused at first which type of bipolar I was, but after doing some research I decided and settled with type II, which my therapist agreed with. More on the low steadily depressed side, with a few manic moments. I can normally tell a difference between PCOS mood swings and Bipolar because when I have my bipolar outbreaks, I feel like I'm in a sound proof box, watching myself do and say things that I can't control, screaming at myself to stop. With the PCOS I just sort of get cranky and a little irritable. I'm just extra sensitive. I do feel that the bipolar has definitely made me more sensitive overall. When someone would normally be sad, I get way down in the dumps, even with medication. When someone is normally just a little excited, I'm barely able to control myself and I get overly excited, anxious and stressed.

Maybe some of that makes sense to you.

Bethann · 07-30-2009, 07:12 PM

How long it takes depends in part on whether you have worked with other psychiatrists (reactions to anti-depressants in particular provide insight into diagnosis), whether the doctor took a very detailed history (which is possible in 2 hours, although it can take a lot longer.)

My doctor suggested fairly early that there were some signs to suggest bipolar, but we didn't settle on the diagnosis for another 9 months, when it became glaringly apparent that I needed to be on a mood stabilizer.

A brief overview:
Bipolar I: characterized primarily by manic episodes, often, but not always, with depression
Bipolar II: characterized primarily by depression, with hypo-manic (lower level mania) episodes. This is what I have.
Cyclothymic Disorder: a mild form, characterized by low-level depressive and hypo-manic states.
Rapid Cycling: bipolar where moods shift month to month
Ultra-rapid cycling: moods can shift daily, or even hourly

My moods are very clearly linked to bipolar, not hormones so I can't help you there.

As for your smoking, if you're going to keep doing it, you need to be honest with your doctor about it. We all do stuff we shouldn't do, whether its pot, drinking, not keeping a good sleep cycle, not exercising, etc... Ideally we use lifestyle as a tool in managing moods, but no one is perfect.

Tina Castle · 07-31-2009, 06:33 PM

When my friend was dx'ed with Bipolar Disorder after being committed 3 times to a mental hospital and after one suicide attempt. This was a 2 year process and at first they just told her she had a mood disorder. She was put on Lithium. Once she got her Bipolar Disoder they put her on Seroquil, Depakote, and Lithium.

I don't think they gave her any clarifications. Most of her docs seemed more focused on finding the right cocktail that would soothe her and stablilize her mood swings.

She too got into drugs (weed, meth, cocaine). Believe me that's not a road you want to travel on. Even weed will mess with you negatively because it's a mood alterer and a gateway drug. Soon you'll need more than weed to stay, "normal."

Try not to smoke that stuff and just keep up with the daily meds. It might be 3 months before you notice a difference, but everyday you take them is a step towards a better way to live.

scarletwalks · 08-05-2009, 01:11 AM

I may be somewhat repetitive in my reply but here goes-for years (about 10)-I am 28 now-my dr. said I had type 2 bipolar because I had recurring bouts of severe depression but no mania. Then when I was 26 I went into a full-blown mania and psychosis. The results were devastating. I lost my job, all my possessions, and landed in jail because I trespassed on someone else's property because I thought God told me to go there and that it was my house.....so-

I now have been correctly diagnosed with type 1 bipolar disorder-it is all throughout my mother's side of the family-that is a main component-IT IS GENETIC!!! A lifesaver is LAMICTAL-the mood stabilizer I take. If you have bipolar you need a mood stabilizer. I tried Lithium and it made me incontinent-it is processed through the kidneys rather than the liver like other meds. I have also tried Tegretol- it caused akathesia-which is constant muscle movement, not being able to sit or stand still.

With this illness you must go to therapy. I go twice a week and I am using dialectical behavior therapy, which works well. I also have borderline personality symptoms and dbt is the treatment. I am trying to rebuild my life now, it is a slow process.

I am on Cymbalta for the depression with Abilify at a low dose (2mg) to increase the effectiveness of the Cymbalta-the doc says that is what it is doing at the low dose-it takes forever to find the right combo of meds, the number one rule is be patient and if you don't like and/or trust your psychiatrist -FIND A NEW ONE! Hope this helps.

Gaishin · 08-18-2009, 02:53 AM

I was misdiagnosed, at first, with depression and ADHD. This was until my new psychiatrist found out about my violent outbursts. She diagnosed me with BP II.

All of my mood swings have been because of BP. The only time I was ever hormonal was when I was pregnant, or when I was on BC.

You never said if the Lithium was helping. Is it? If not, then you may need to fix that. I'm on Valproic Acid, and that works wonderfully (though, while TTC, I have to switch to Seroquel). Med switches are good. You need to make sure that you're on the right thing. Balancing your meds is the hardest part.....

melisadenny · 08-19-2009, 06:55 AM

People never never understand the true severity of bipolar disorder. They also do not understand that for an "episode" to be considered Bipolar it has to last all day every day for a week....... That's the minimum, in reality the episodes last for weeks or months or even years. In addition.... the average bipolar only has one or maybe two episodes a year... (long term depression being predominant). There are cases where a person can have more than one or two episodes a year but it is really rare. Also you have to have the mania (or hypomania) for it to be bipolar. Without mania it is just recurring depression.

This is what Bipolar is like for me.

Depression- to tired to get out of bed, shower, brush your teeth..... lie in bed and stare at the ceiling for days at a time, crying a lot, feelings of guilt, and self loathing, may be suicidal but are too tired to even consider planning it, sleep 16 hours a day or more, eating too much or not enough.

amberjusm · 08-27-2009, 06:17 PM

I may be a little late on this, but here's what I hate:
People don't understand the severity of having Bipolar Disorder, but ALSO
people take it TOO FAR. and they make people who have it, feel NUTS.
You shouldn't worry about what type Bipolar you are. It may be that your doctor knows that you are but that as someone mentioned, she hasn't specified what type yet. I work in a psych practice and the dr. I work for is my dr. I was diagnosed this year with bipolar disorder and it's hard to admit that you have it when people around you make you feel like a crazy person for having it.
So, I know how you feel.

I also agree with the Lamictal statement. Lamictal is a GREAT mood stabilizer. It has worked wonders for me. I take it with a VERY low dose of Lithium *my lithium levels are below normal ranges* So, that's something to bring up.

Just focus on you and getting better, don't worry about which is which, everything will fall into place when you know you're better. As for the smoking, if you think you're doing it because you're anxious...try seeing a therapist? It works!

Best of luck!