Got To Get My Heart Back

Hey ladies! I wanted to say thanks for telling me your stories and giving me your advice. It didn't look too bad on the scan today. I think I said earlier she showed me like a trail of blood that was really thin and moving around the baby and out of the cervix. I am just so thankful that this is something that can be recovered from, and that babies have and are making it in spite of these things. Every time I see that little heartbeat I just feel so hopeful, and thankful. I've been taking it very ...

Thanks everyone for your well wishes and prayers. It means so much to me. The ER called me back after I'd been at home thinking I'll never have an answer. A better radiologist came in and I was notified that it is a subchorionic hemorrhage. I think I can see it on my 1 ultrasound photo. It doesn't look like it's touching the baby. The bleeding is subsiding, and I'm hoping it ends completely soon. It is so disheartening to have to wear a pad while I'm pregnant. I know that most pregnancies work out ...

I need prayer. I hadn't had any cramping for 3 days. Then on the way to my scan in the car I'm cramping and it's not severe it feels like AF. When I step out of the car at the scan I feel the gush. I tell my husband and daughter to stop playing around I need to hurry up and get in I don't like what I just felt. Once inside I go up the elevator and go straight up to the RE's office bathroom. There it was, bright red blood in my underwear, and dripping into the toilet. Thinking it would stop I stuffed

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So I couldn't take it anymore and I explained as best I could my condition to my daughter, because I am so exhausted and I have no energy, an she just wants to play the day away. She asked me to her room to play with her toys with her. I asked her to give me a few minutes. She watched an episode of spongebob and asked again. I told her I couldn't and she began to cry. I then told her about the baby, but about not having a heartbeat yet. I told her that if for any reason we never got our baby, mommy ...

Alright, I had my first ultrasound with my RE today, and everything looked fine to him. He is so hurried all the time.

I went to the ER with super light pink/orange looking spotting fearing the worse. I had an ultrasound there and the tech spend LOTS of time looking around in there. She identified a fetal pole, sac, and everything, including what she thought was a little flickering heartbeat. She tried to show it to me even though she wasn't supposed to and honestly I couldn't see ...

So on a whim I've decided to take a break from soulcysters.com. The main reason is because I didn't realize how nervous I'd be once we conceived our second child. It seems like there are so many losses on this site and it really bothers me. So I'm taking a break to make sure that I don't read any more of it for a while. I know it seems selfish but my mind is like a friggin' whirlwind of what ifs, like what if I'm too fat this time, what if my PCOS is worse this time, what if my past illness comes ...

SO my final beta was done this morning. I got up and drive at 6:50AM to get to my RE's lab and give the blood. There was literally me and one other woman in there. The lab was only open for a few hours for Dr. Zacur's IVF and alt. treatment patients. I was there a total of 5 minutes, but that hour of driving was totally worth it. I should have a number and an appointment date for my first scan on Monday. I pray that my baby is strong, and hanging out right what he/she is supposed to be.

371!!!! Now I just have to do one more tomorrow, and then on Monday we get to hear the last result and schedule our first heart beat appointment which will probably be a couple wks from now. SO EXCITED!!!

Yes, a number, the results were back for only 1 test, which was the one done at 3 wks 6 days. It was duh-duh-duh-duuuuuuuuuuh 92.6. That's good right? I asked the nurse and she said it varies so widely from woman to woman that at this point they just want to make sure it doubles. She said that she would check the computer again at the very end of the day, to make sure that they don't pop up around 5PM. After that I'll be waiting until Friday. Man I wish I would have had them done Monday, Wednesday, ...

Has anyone ever used pee sticks to keep track of their levels until they got beta results. I've been dipping a stick with FMU to keep track. It was SUPER dark today. I taped them to a white piece of paper in order so that I can see the trend of them getting darker and darker. The one from today was SUPER dark so I think the numbers are going up. I'm using the pregnancy tracker on FF, and it says 4 wks 3 days. I thought I was 4 wks exactly. Eh. I just can't wait to finish all 3 betas and get myself ...