Is any1 listening
Hello out there ... 
I really just need sum1 to listen to me and help me through this very rough patch i have hit...
The basics im 31, from ny , TTC 10 YEARS NOW , dx in 1999 with PCOS, Nov.12th 2005 i had a miscarraige from which was natural and i didnt know i was pregnant so i never even had the chace to enjoy the moment when the lil line turned pink !!
for a few years i have been ok ..i accepted not being able to conceive i was happy on the outside for the most part ...
But now more recently im seeing my friends have baby after baby and its starting to hurt again .. i find myslef crying and dreaming again . I mean lets be real i guess its always been in the back of my mind right?
I know like most of you ... I just want to have children sooo bad
and sumtimes i find myslef feeling anger towards other mothers.. is that normal? I have been through alot i have a family member who i would say preys on my weakness which is children and she drops them off to me and takes off for weeks months at a time and then when i finally go to court she makes statments like "it's not her fault i cant have kids" and she was even pregant once and had me all gased up thinking she was gonna sign the child over to me , i mean i went all out , court baby supplies the whole nine ..come to find out she told a few other women the same thing ..So now here i am even angier !!
I just dont know which direction i should go in any more ... My mind is saying just move on , give up let it be .. But my heart is soo not having any of that ... I already tried clomid about 7 years ago and im considering asking my doctor what else we can try or if i can try clomid again ... My boyfriend has 2 older girls both in college ..he's totally on board with what ever i want to do ... Oh i just dont want to get sucked back into the whole i hate myslef thing ... Its a scary place
Who ever reads this thanks so much for just listening and if you want to talk back im here ...
I really just need sum1 to listen to me and help me through this very rough patch i have hit...
The basics im 31, from ny , TTC 10 YEARS NOW , dx in 1999 with PCOS, Nov.12th 2005 i had a miscarraige from which was natural and i didnt know i was pregnant so i never even had the chace to enjoy the moment when the lil line turned pink !!
for a few years i have been ok ..i accepted not being able to conceive i was happy on the outside for the most part ...
But now more recently im seeing my friends have baby after baby and its starting to hurt again .. i find myslef crying and dreaming again . I mean lets be real i guess its always been in the back of my mind right?
I know like most of you ... I just want to have children sooo bad
and sumtimes i find myslef feeling anger towards other mothers.. is that normal? I have been through alot i have a family member who i would say preys on my weakness which is children and she drops them off to me and takes off for weeks months at a time and then when i finally go to court she makes statments like "it's not her fault i cant have kids" and she was even pregant once and had me all gased up thinking she was gonna sign the child over to me , i mean i went all out , court baby supplies the whole nine ..come to find out she told a few other women the same thing ..So now here i am even angier !!
I just dont know which direction i should go in any more ... My mind is saying just move on , give up let it be .. But my heart is soo not having any of that ... I already tried clomid about 7 years ago and im considering asking my doctor what else we can try or if i can try clomid again ... My boyfriend has 2 older girls both in college ..he's totally on board with what ever i want to do ... Oh i just dont want to get sucked back into the whole i hate myslef thing ... Its a scary place
Who ever reads this thanks so much for just listening and if you want to talk back im here ...
Total Comments 2
Comments
 |  I know what you mean when you say you get jealous of other mothers. Everytime I see someone who is a bad mom, I think to myself, "why them and not me." This site is great because there are so many women out there experiencing the same emotions. You should check out some of the threads because there are so many women with similar stories who you can talk to. Feel free to leave me a message anytime- and don't worry, there's plenty of people who will listen when you wanna talk. |
Posted 11-03-2009 at 01:25 AM by MrsBishop  |
| |  i Know same here ... Its heart breaking |
| Posted 11-16-2009 at 10:48 PM by Delicate Soul |
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