i can't help it, i see people that are along in their pregnancies, and i wish i was still pregnant. i know that he is here, and i can't change that. but i wanted to be pregnant and enjoy it, as he will probably be my only baby. i just wish he was with me instead of an hour away in a hospital with different people taking care of him all the time. i can't wait to bring him home. i am missing him terribly. i am not enjoying pumping all the time, and i am experiencing a big increase in my pcos symptoms....

JoyannaWants2BaMommy

i had my shower sunday and aside from not really getting anything i needed and no one showing up but the older church ladies, it wasn't that bad. i got to go see me little doody monster, and kangaroo'd with him for about an hour. i talked to him, and told him all about the stuff he got at his shower, and talked about when he gets to come home, how much fun we'll get to have, me, him and daddy. and how much i love him. and he's so purty, he'd look up at me with them big eyes, like what are you doin...

JoyannaWants2BaMommy

i know that i am having all the symptoms of PPD. i am on my full dose of antidepressant, but this is the most depressed i've been probably since i was a young teen. i feel so inadequate, like i am worthless, i will not be a good mom, my family is better off without me, all those things. i have been having regular daily thoughts of dying, or hurting myself. i feel like i have nothing to live for. i have no friends, i do not even want to talk on the phone to my family. i won't even call the NICU to...

JoyannaWants2BaMommy

well, i have problems that my antidepressant alone can't fix. i totally lost it tonight, i've had such bad anxiety all day.

i can't get a grip on everything going on at once. i can't go see my baby as often as i really want b/c of gas and money issues. i was supposed to be working and making money, but with the baby coming a whole 3 months early i haven't been able to work, and we really need the money. we usually are budgeted really tight every week to make sure we pay everything...

JoyannaWants2BaMommy

so i have signed up for a debt management program where they work with the credit card companys and lower your intrest so you can get your debt paid off quicker. they draft out 1 payment a month and pay everyone. i am not behind or anything i am totally current and have good credit no late payments, etc. just wanting to save some $ and get out of debt. the counselor i talked to said that the first month is always wacky b/c all your accounts are due on different days, but that after the first month...

JoyannaWants2BaMommy