Christian Cysters - Women After God's Own Heart

DagsinRed · 07-25-2006, 01:24 AM

Okay ladies, here it is! Our first Christian Cysters / Sisters joint biblestudy!

The purpose of this thread is to share our thoughts, prayer requests, comments and questions about our current reading in

"A Woman After God's Own Heart" by Elizabeth George.

If you want to join, let me know and I'll post a list of names. If you haven't joined us, but want to - come on in! Just grab a copy of the book and get reading! PM me and I'll add you to the list.

I can't wait to share this amazing book with you all!

God bless,

Aimee

CURRENT CHRISTIAN CYSTERS:

Dagsinred - Aimee
Sweetsmom - Deidre
ACP78 - Amanda
His_Angel - Nadine
SSM1123 - Sarah

ACP78 · 07-25-2006, 01:50 AM

Just subscribing to the thread. I'm so excited- this is going to be cool!

DagsinRed · 07-25-2006, 01:52 AM

WEEK ONE

"A Word of Welcome"
And
Part 1 - Chapter One "A Heart Devoted to God"

Psalm 34:3
Come, let us tell of the LORD's greatness; let us exalt his name together.

sweetsmom · 07-25-2006, 04:31 AM

I can't wait to start reading and doing a study with you guys!

sweetsmom · 07-26-2006, 03:41 AM

Ok, i just got done with the reading...before I move on to the study guide I wanted to ask some questions.

Actually this first one is more of a statement. We have all been asked at some point are you a Mary or a Martha...I am most deffinately a Martha. Maybe my OCD? I want everything to be perfect. Even as I was reading the book I was getting anxious about the idea of Jesus visiting me and my home in the flesh! I eventually want to be to the point where my home is in order at all times so I can enjoy it when people visit me or so I can invite someone over without worrying about how the house looks.

Here is one of my questions. How does God speak to you? I have never heard actual words come to me like a conversation. Passages of scripture have come to mind, people have come to me and said the right thing at the right time, songe lead me, etc...but never actual voice from God. Is there scripture that God will speak to us in voice?

DagsinRed · 07-27-2006, 05:52 AM

Hey Deidre,

It's an interesting question. I'll give you my opinion (which is obviously just that!).

In the old testament there are lots of examples of God speaking to men / women directly in lots of different ways:

• Speaking physically - a voice (Genesis 35:1, Exodus 20:22, Isaiah 21:6)
• ...through “dreams” when man was asleep. (I Kings 3:5, II Chronicles 1:7)
• ...through “visions” when man was awake. (Ezekiel 1:1, Daniel 10)
• ...through signs and miracles. (Genesis 9:11-13, Exodus 3:1-4)

It is my opinion God worked / spoke what we see as more "directly" back then because humans didn't have the Holy Spirit living within them, and His written word was yet to completely recorded.

I believe that in today's world (since the arrival, death and resurrection of Christ) God has actually blessed us even more, because He now lives literally within us - We are no longer physically separate from Him! His spirit is guiding us at every moment! (Check out I Corinthians 2:10-16).

We are also blessed with His whole and complete written Word, which gives us everything we need to deal with life! (II Timothy 3:16-17)

It is also my opinion that much of the reason we don't feel certain of His guidance / direction is because we are either in sin and seeking our own desires rather than His, or in disobediance to His word. After all, if He has given us His written word - clear and complete guidelines for our lives - and we have defied or refused to trust in Him, why would He choose to reveal more specific or detailed directions to us?

I have been convicted in the past year or two that much of my confusion, frustration or fear in life has resulted from not knowing and depending on His word - trusting it to guide me to His will. Once I committed to knowing His word and asked Him to open His word to me through His spirit every time I read it (which He is always faithful to do!), I have learned more and more that He speaks to me every day - through His word, through the Holy Spirit's guidance of my heart and conscience, and through other people.

I am rarely uncertain now about His direction - not because He "speaks" to me, but because I have realised (through His word) that it is only my heart He is concerned with. If my heart is truly in the right place before Him, I will desire what He desires, so I am free to choose what I want! (Psalm 37:4-5).

I hope this helps you!

God bless!

Aimee

SSM1123 · 07-27-2006, 03:44 PM

sweetsmom,
Wow! What an awesome question to start off with. Of course, it can be a tricky question too! So, I will try to keep my opinion general, yet specific (does that make sense?). First, I want to say that I agree with what Aimee said and I'm not trying to contradict that. I'm just giving my take on the subject.

I do think that He uses a vast array of tools to communicate with us. The problem lies in our unwillingness to listen. Sometimes it is as simple as a song or a verse. There are times I can just think of a song and start tearing up. That's God trying to work on my heart. I just have to make sure I let Him in. Or, when we can't get a scripture out of our head, that's Him. And it may not just been one scripture, maybe He's just trying to make us look at that one and then keep going and see where it leads. Sometimes I think people get hung up on one verse and don't realize there are more around it! Maybe it's one verse that gets you to open your Bible, but maybe He wants us to read the whole chapter to find His message.

I do believe that He can talk directly to us. I don't have a scripture for it, but I've heard the testimonies of others and I believe them.

Many times, I think He uses other people's voice to communicate to us rather than a direct conversation. I've had people whom I barely know tell me that I've been on their heart and they don't know why. And, I've felt that way towards others. There are times I've had the most over-whelming feeling that somebody needs prayer, and I have no idea what's going on in his or her life at that moment. But, I think He uses us for several reasons. (I'll say this part in first person because I've read it through in 2nd person and got myself lost!) One, to make sure I am receptive to Him and willing to reach out to you, and two: to let you know He cares enough to put you on my heart. But, I feel there's also a third reason that is more subtle: He is letting me know that He cares enough about me to use me as a tool for His will. I just have to be willing to be used!

Or, we get to thinking too much. We think our problem is not as big as someone else's and we should be grateful for what we have and stop complaining to Him so much. And, that goes back to that scripture in the book that she mentioned, Revelation 3:15-16 about being lukewarm. (My grandmother loved that passage and would talk about it all the time, so I feel I have a good grasp on it.) You see, I've been lukewarm and I've been cold and PTL I now am hot! Because it's in those moments of thinking that God is too busy for us that we become lukewarm. I agree with what the author said, but I think it goes deeper. Being lukewarm is more than just being indifferent; it's being unreceptive to God. It's that devil inside of us that tells us our needs are too small for Him to care about. We still love and want to worship Him, but we feel He doesn't have time to care for us. That's being lukewarm, and that's when He can't talk to us. The cold person just shuts God out completely and "KNOWS" God is too busy for them, so they become too busy for God. But that's not always bad. Sometimes it takes being ice cold to finally become hot. He said he'd rather us be cold or hot. B/c when we're cold, He can still work with us and talk to us. The HOT person realizes that Jesus came down here for us and realizes there is NOTHING too small. What may be small to one is huge to another. The hot person sees that, though God created the universe and all it's vastness, He also created the ant. We worry that God cannot care about us because we cannot wrap our heads around the infiniteness of Him. The only thing that limits God is our minds. Our hearts are always open to Him; it's our minds that shut Him out.

I realize that I really got off the path of your question, but I felt like I just couldn't type fast enough to keep up with my thoughts, so maybe it's not for me to know why I went on and on. B/c some of this I just thought of now and have never thought of before in my life! I hope I didn't step on any toes! And I hope it wasn't too much to read!

DagsinRed · 07-27-2006, 11:04 PM

Amen to that Sarah!

Wow, I've just read through the first chapter, and I'm so excited to do this book again - and with you ladies!

I read this for the first time about a year and half ago and it changed my whole perspective on God and my life. I remember how excited I was at the time, but I didn't have any point of reference for it. I'm encouraged that I can see God's leading more in my life now, but also challenged that I have SUCH a long way to go!

I think the thing I struggle with the most is "Choosing God's way at every opportunity". The fact of the matter is, I am lazy. I often procrastinate or do things half-heartedly because I prefer to do things that I enjoy.

I am convicted that this prayer of commitment needs to become a habit, so I can start the day seeking God's will rather than my own. I often pray for others first thing, but usually forget to examine my own heart right then!

What did you ladies think of that idea? What things in your life are you afraid of giving up control over, or find you don't want to 'surrender'?

I find this pregnancy very difficult to surrender.

I find my husband's spiritual life and growth very difficult to be patient about (knowing God is in control and working, instead of trying to force change in him myself).

I find time very difficult to surrender - when I want to do something or when we're making plans that I'm looking forward to, I want everything to happen RIGHT NOW. It's more than just impatience though - I'm afraid if we don't get moving now, then God will change the plan and I won't get to do it at all.

Do you ladies experience these kind of fears or things you want to hold tightly, rather than let go?

sweetsmom · 07-28-2006, 02:19 AM

That is an interesting question Aimee! Getting pregnant was always a huge one for me. The other things have to do with "controlling other people". Like DH or the kids. I tend to be a perfectionist so when DS misbehaves it is sometimes hard to turn to God for guidance instead of losing my temper and yelling. This only happens every once in a while but it does occasionally happen (like when he is being stubborn and won't quit arguing with me-I wonder where he gets that?!)

i have more to say but I need to come back later bc DH thinks I am cleaning the house, and you guys had a lot for me to read! Now I can meditate on these ideas and see what God reveals.

ACP78 · 07-30-2006, 03:44 AM

Okay, I read the section last night. The minute I started reading it, I was tearing up. I'm sure my DH thinks I'm crazy sometimes, haha! But it only confirms to me how much I have been missing by not doing Bible studies and reading God's word more. I am so excited over this study! As a side note- DH said he could really tell a difference in me since I joined SC!

Okay, to answer Aimee:
I have found TTC extremely difficult to surrender to God. In fact, this medicine break I am on is my way of really trying to surrender it to God. Lately, I have been really tempted to take control back, so please pray for me- that I will do the Lord's will. There is a new fertility office that just opened that is very close to home & getting fabulous reviews, and I am SO tempted to go. I wish that God WOULD speak to me in an audible voice so I would just know what to do. I have found my TTC journey has been the most challenging decision to surrender thus far.

The older I get, the more I have trouble surrendering my time to the Lord, too. DH & I are in the music department at church, and we have service Wed night, Sat night, Sun afternoon & Sun night. Lately, I have started to resent how much time out of our weekend it takes up. It's just really hard to hear people at work on Monday talking about everything they did over the weekend, and we really only have Sat afternoon to get anything done. Serving God in the music department is a priviledge & I love doing it, but sometimes I feel myself getting selfish over our weekend time.

DagsinRed · 07-31-2006, 12:48 AM

<o:p> </o:p>

WEEK TWO

Part I – The Pursuit of God<o:p></o:p>

Chapter II – A Heart Abiding in God’s Word<o:p></o:p>

<o:p> </o:p>(A.K.A - Nurturing a “Root System”)<o:p></o:p>

<o:p> </o:p>
Ephesians 3:17-18<o:p></o:p>
And I pray that Christ will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love really is.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>

Questions to Consider:<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
How does your “visible” self compare with your “private” self? What would people in your life be surprised to learn about your time / conduct when alone?<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
When you look back on a normal day, what activities, people or habits are given top priority?<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
Where is your first instinct to go for support or resources in a crisis? <o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
What (or who) do you trust to get you through hard times?<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
Where (or who) is the first place you go for advice, guidance or input?<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
·What do your answers to the above questions tell you about your current “root system”?<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
·What could you do differently today to seek more from God rather than self or others?<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
Verses to Consider:<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
Colossians 2:6-7<o:p></o:p>
And now, just as you accepted Christ Jesus as your Lord, you must continue to live in obedience to him. Let your roots grow down into him and draw up nourishment from him, so you will grow in faith, strong and vigorous in the truth you were taught. Let your lives overflow with thanksgiving for all he has done.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
Colossians 3:16-17<o:p></o:p>
Let the words of Christ, in all their richness, live in your hearts and make you wise. Use his words to teach and counsel each other. Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts. And whatever you do or say, let it be as a representative of the Lord Jesus, all the while giving thanks through him to God the Father.<o:p></o:p>

SSM1123 · 07-31-2006, 01:51 PM

Amanda: What are the odds that what you said about surrendering your time is just what was talked about over dinner between services yesterday? (DH and I went out to eat w/ PP, AS, SL & their families). Tim mentioned that he really has to make himself go on Wed night, but he knows he needs it. But, he often misses Saturday b/c he needs that day to himself. He said something that really put it in context for me b/c I can't really go on Wed or Sat night b/c DS won't last! He said it would be great if church was open 24/7, so that you could go whenever you need to...but even if it was open 24/7, he wouldn't be there that whole time. He said having service so much in one week can be hard on people like the pastor, the piano player and the drummer b/c they are really needed each service. But he also feel that God understands that you have to take time for you in order to serve Him better (I'm paraphrasing, b/c I can't remember exactly how he put it). So, to make a point, I know your dh is often on drums, but if there's a night he's not scheduled to play, I wouldn't feel guilty about missing a service now and then. People will understand that you and dh have a life outside of church and it sometimes needs your attention. Even our ministry has said that you have to put a focus on family in order to serve God better. I don't think it's selfish to want to spend time at home w/ dh, esp when you both work hard all week!

To answer Aimee: I have thought long and hard about this question. I have a hard time surrendering a lot! W/o going into too many details (and I'm not looking for a pity party!), I had a very bad, abusive childhood. My dad was a very controlling man, right down to how we had our hair cut. So, when I got older and could finally have some control over myself, I ran with it. But, that makes it hard for me to relinquish control now. You see, I was talking to a cousin of mine @ church last night and for some unknown reason, I told her about my biggest fear, which is of repeating the bad parenting I recieved, b/c it's all I know. My biggest fear is how I will treat ds when he acts up b/c my parents reaction was always to hit and we weren't allowed to have any kind of opinion @ all. (Children are to be seen, not heard was the mantra!) So my fear is of repeating history. But, she told me I cannot let that fear rule me, that I have to give it over to God and know that He knows my heart and will help me but I just have to give it over to Him. So I think that is and will be the hardest thing for me to surrender, my fear. My heart is already His, that's the easy part. It's my mind that I've got to let go of.

DagsinRed · 07-31-2006, 10:10 PM

Wow Sarah, great to hear from you!

I hear you on the parenting fear thing. I think that's one of the good things that came out of my miscarriage a couple of years ago. When I got pg last time I was struck with that exact fear (different kinds of bad parenting, but the same fear of propogating bad cycles).

I've spent a lot of time praying about this, and giving attnetion to the issue. In the last few months God's made it clear to me:

I can use my parents as my role model for parenting (not flawless!) or I can use Him. He is a parent - a perfect parent. More so, He is MY parent. By learning and understanding His character and paying attention to how Christ dealt with people, I can learn how better to respond and react to conflict or issues in my life.

This has just been affirmed to me this morning. Dh had a stressful morning - woke up to 7 missed calls from work (at 7:00am!!!). He didn't respond in the best way to this (using some "course language" shall we say), and when I dropped him off, I asked him to please stop doing that around me - so he walked away.

My natural reaction to that situation is to be self-righteous and wounded - to make him feel bad about how he's wronged me, and to stay angry until he gets home and I can tell him off. I know this is wrong (but is the example my mother set!), so this morning, instead of immediately jumping on my phone to text him and make him feel bad, I prayed instead. I asked God to show me how to respond to this situation and heal it rather than make it worse.

The short story is, He did. A few minutes later I realised I hadn't been easy on him either, so instead of harassing him for making me feel bad, I apologised for adding to his pressure and just asked him not to walk away from me when he's angry as it makes me sad. His response was soft and apologetic instead of prideful and angry.

I am just sitting here this morning becoming more and more certain this is how we can overcome these obstacles from our childhoods - by turning to HIM for the perfect example, instead of our parents.

John 13:15 - (Christ speaking) "I have given you an example to follow. Do as I have done to you."

Wow, that was a speel I didn't mean to make! God bless sisters!

Aimee

SSM1123 · 08-03-2006, 06:20 PM

<o:p></o:p><o:p></o:p>
Well, I've put a lot of thought into answering this one. There' several aspects to cover! So I thought I'd just go down the list! I'm sure this'll be long, so sorry in advance!!!

Ephesians 3:17-18<o:p></o:p>
And I pray that Christ will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love really is.<o:p></o:p>
I just love the way Paul wrote! (I read the KJV version and it's just so eloquent.) Verse 19 really goes even beyond what these two verses say about the rewards of serving Him "v.19 And to know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with all the fulness of God."<o:p></o:p>
Can you imagine being filled w/ all the fulness of God? What a glorious feeling that must be!!!

Questions to Consider:<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
How does your “visible” self compare with your “private” self? What would people in your life be surprised to learn about your time / conduct when alone?
I think people would be surprised to see the "private" me. I am a very insecure person, but I try not to let it show, but when I'm alone, I don't have to pretend. There are things I do and don't do in my private life that people might think are silly, like avoiding mirrors. I just get so disgusted to look at myself. But, it's not something people would know.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
When you look back on a normal day, what activities, people or habits are given top priority?<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>My son is always given top priority, hands down. I am a very "routine" person though, and I don't really prioritize any of it. For instance, I try to practice my instruments 2-3 nights a week and almost every night before I go to bed I read at least 1 chapter of the Bible.

Where is your first instinct to go for support or resources in a crisis? <o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>I don't go anywhere. I am very much a person who keeps it all in. Often times I don't even talk to my dh.

What (or who) do you trust to get you through hard times?<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>Ha! Still going through hard times! I try to put my faith and trust in God, but it's a real battle.

Where (or who) is the first place you go for advice, guidance or input?<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>Again, I don't really go to anybody. There are things I ask my mil about, but there just things like advice on cooking or something about my ds.

·What do your answers to the above questions tell you about your current “root system”?<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>Isn't it obvious? I don't have one!

·What could you do differently today to seek more from God rather than self or others?<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>Have better faith. And that's hard to do. We're coming up on our 6yr anniversary and it just feels like things are never going to get any better than what they are right now. For every 2 steps forward, we go 10 back.
<o:p> </o:p>
Verses to Consider:<o:p></o:p>
Colossians 2:6-7<o:p></o:p>
And now, just as you accepted Christ Jesus as your Lord, you must continue to live in obedience to him. Let your roots grow down into him and draw up nourishment from him, so you will grow in faith, strong and vigorous in the truth you were taught. Let your lives overflow with thanksgiving for all he has done.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
Colossians 3:16-17<o:p></o:p>
Let the words of Christ, in all their richness, live in your hearts and make you wise. Use his words to teach and counsel each other. Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts. And whatever you do or say, let it be as a representative of the Lord Jesus, all the while giving thanks through him to God the Father.<o:p></o:p>
I think that when you read the whole chapter surrounding these verses, it is really giving us basic instructions for how to live day to day. I think both chapters are reinforcing the 10 Commandments. Chapter 2 is teaching us how to serve Him spritually, while the 3rd chapter is the more day-to-day worldly aspect of serving him. Verses 18-22 of chapter 3 really are setting up the family structure that we are to follow, going through each member the family and telling them how to serve the other members of the family. They are two really great chapters on getting the basics of everyday life down.

DagsinRed · 08-04-2006, 05:25 AM

My turn! I know you ladies might not all be comfortable sharing your answers to these questions, but I hope you'll give them some thought whether or not you share your thoughts with us!

I've been thinking these things through and chewing them over since the other day.

How does your “visible” self compare with your “private” self? What would people in your life be surprised to learn about your time / conduct when alone?<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>PRobably about how lazy I am. I do give a bit of effort to helping or serving others, and I think people think I'm pretty productive and hard working. The reality is that I have to really push myself to be disciplined to get stuff done, and often procrastinate / cut corners so I can have more "down time".

When you look back on a normal day, what activities, people or habits are given top priority?<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>Eating... It's a sad and sorry fact that I give a lot of time, energy and thought to food. When i look at my bank statements, it's where all my "frivolous" money goes and during the day I always give more thought to what I'm going to have for lunch than what I'm goign to say to husband in the evenings!

Where is your first instinct to go for support or resources in a crisis? <o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>It used to be my friends. Then it was dh. I am slowly learning to go to God first. I have gotten far enough that in an honest moment I've realised He's much more successful and satisfying in the ways He helps me to deal with stuff... but I still fall into the trap of going to people to try and get support or sympathy. Often times I find their resources insufficient now as I realise they are as flawed and needy as I am!

What (or who) do you trust to get you through hard times?<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>AGain, I am learning to find my sufficiency and comfort in God. I've been encouraged by this pregnancy in that even though it is emotionally hard and I am fearful, my trust is really in God. I feel like I've passed the acid test!

Where (or who) is the first place you go for advice, guidance or input?<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>I try to make sure (now) that it's the bible. The more I come to know the word and the more I meditate on it and discuss it with God, the more I see His plans are perfect, and His ways are the best. I also trust the counsel of people in my life who I know really love Him and know His word.

·What do your answers to the above questions tell you about your current “root system”?<o:p></o:p>
 <o:p> </o:p>That it is flawed, but moving in the right direction. I'm both encouraged and convicted about how far I have to go... I guess this is a good thing!

·What could you do differently today to seek more from God rather than self or others?<o:p></o:p>
 <o:p> </o:p>Be more structured with my time and routine - making sure He becomes my priority first and foremost. I think I also need to be willing to give up some indulgent habits (eating nice food, etc) and seeking His fulfillment instead.
<o:p> </o:p>