Devastated by Chemical Pregnancy Loss - Advice Anyone?
Hello cysters, I just got confirmation from that our pregnancy is not viable and the baby did not develop after 6 weeks. As you can imagine I am devastated.
I did not even begin to fathom - did not even begin to even glimpse the enormity - of the changes I have and am continuing to undergo. It's like I am at depths of my being - at rock bottom -
I am trying to keep positive. I know that God does have other plans for me. I know that if I turn to God with utter and blind faith, and resolve in my heart and mind to walk only with Him and toward Him, he will pick me up by the bootstraps and lead me home. I am lost right now....
I have not actually miscarried yet. My Beta levels was 45 today...Does your beta level have to be 0 - ZERO before AF arrives? Will be cycles resume to normal. I am on 1000mg of met a day....any help please...
Babydust to all....hugs Nicole
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Married Aug. 8th, 2003
TTC Since January 2005
2 Chemical Pregnancies To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
1st IVF - 08/2007
ER - 08/10/2007
ET - 08/15/2007 - 2 blasts trfd and 1 vaculating= 3 embryo's = BFP To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
When I lost my baby, it took a little over a month for my period to start again. When it came back it was a bit heavier and crampier then normal, but the next one was back to normal. It took about 2 weeks for my BETA to return to zero.
Your in my prayers, ***HUGS***
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On a TTC break...
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I'm so sorry for your loss! Everyone's body responds differently to this, but my experience with my five week loss was that I started spotting when my beta was still in the 200 range. It just depends on the individual, and I hope that the physical part is as easy as possible for you!
I completely agree that the experience of losing a baby changes a person just as we were changed when we conceived. We became mothers, then we became mothers who are grieving. No one could ever prepare for such a thing. We simply must find a way to cope. Religious faith helps for some, and others find another path for a while or forever. I personally found some very low and dark places during the months following my losses, and I hope never to see those again. The love of my husband and the whisper of hope for a family kept me going. I hope something can be a guiding light during this time in your life, but just take your time. Many hugs!
__________________ Metformin 1500mg, Yasmin, managing IR/pcos with lower carbs
First pregnancy ended at 23 weeks due to incompetent cervix.
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Second loss March 9, 2004 at five weeks
Third pregnancy, Cerclage at 13w
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Fourth pregnancy, Cerclage at 13w
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__________________ Monique(27) DH(31) Dx: PCOS-1999, Diabetes II-2005 Aiden James born 6/17/08 1 Angel Baby due to pPROM and Inc. Cervix (7/20/06) 1 Furbaby Brownie the Chihuahua
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I am so sorry for your loss. If the baby stopped growing have they suggested a D&C or let your body try to pass it naturally
FYI~~
If you baby stopped growing at 6 wks then it was not a chemical pregnancy. A chemical pregnancy is when the baby doesn't implant at all and you m/c by 4-5 wks (there is no baby found on u/s's). I have had 3 of them and one regular m/c *blighted ovum*
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Just my experience on hcg levels...my last m/c was the worst by far I think because the hcg levels just wouldn't go down...I bled on and off for 3 weeks. Like you our baby had stopped growing at 7 weeks and I was given a pill to help things along...for the life of me I can't remember what it was now. My hcg levels at our u/s that confirmed our loss was 10,200...they slowly dropped. I had 6 betas done in 3 weeks. I wanted to m/c naturally but since this experience I won't opt for it again. It was like losing my baby again each time I went in for a beta.
Things happen so fast one day you are pregnant, getting ready to have a little one that you longed so much for and then something like this happens and in one instant your dreams, your hope of the future is ripped away from you...that is a big change in itself. We each grieve differently but it sounds like you faith that your lord will pick you back up and carry you through your darkest hour. I pray you may find some peace soon. (((hugs)))
I have been truly Blessed and amazed to see many posters on this subject/ this site. I have to admit I was really apprehensive to even put my story out there...
Thanks to all of you that shared your stories with me ... I truly believe they have helped me. At the very least, they have helped me realize that I am by no means the only person that has experienced a loss like this.
I still have not starting any heavy bleeding or cramping. I have a Dr.'s appt Monday to check my beta's again, I was told if I had still not m/c by then they would give me methotrexate to help further reduce the beta's and hopefully initiate my AF. It just sucks, I want this over with, as bad as that sounds and I am sorry to sound that way but I just want to be able to move on. Emotions are crazy.
Thanks again so much to everyone out there for listening and sharing. I would love to continue to hear more stories and/or advice. I hope to continue to hear more soon!
Take Care
Nicole
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Married Aug. 8th, 2003
TTC Since January 2005
2 Chemical Pregnancies To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
1st IVF - 08/2007
ER - 08/10/2007
ET - 08/15/2007 - 2 blasts trfd and 1 vaculating= 3 embryo's = BFP To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Nicole, my heart breaks for you (and for all of us) I miscarried my first at 13 weeks and that was 4 months ago.
My doctor actually said one of the most helpful things - I keep coming back to it. She said that as soon as you find out you're pregnant, you imagine how your entire pregnancy will be, what that baby will be like when it's born and all of the milestones in it's life. When you have a loss, that entire lifetime is ripped away, not just those weeks that you were pregnant. This will be hard, but know that many of us have lived through this and you will too!
Hannah
For I know the plans I have for you, delcares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. You will seek Me and find Me when you seek Me with all your heart.
Jeremiah 29:11-13
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+ pregnancy test 6/19/06
M/C 8/21/06 at 13 4/7 weeks
+ HPT 9/13/07
Beatrix Adele born May 7, 2008
5 lbs, 17 1/2 inches
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Just lots of hugs to ya, hon. You sound like you need them
When the cramping hits, get some of those Thermacare heat wraps. they help a lot. That and some chocolate.
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I'm so sorry sweetie! So many of us have been there. I have to have a d&c done when I had one of my losses. I wanted it all over with and my doctor suggested a d&c for me. I was also able to have testing done to see if there was a problem with the baby...which there was nothing that showed up in the chromosomes, however that doesn't mean that the DNA was OK>
Just so you know, you didn't have a chemical pregnancy...that's a bit different. It sounds like you had a blighted ovum. A chemical pregnancy is when the tests are positive and NOTHING forms. Just as rotten, but a little different. You had a sac which had potential.
I'm so very sorry for your loss. It really sucks and so few people understand it.
__________________ Celtic Spirit
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Take time to grieve. Even though you were pregnant for a short time, it's still a loss of a dream, and that hurts.
I had an early miscarriage. We saw the heartbeat at 6 weeks and when we went in at 8 weeks, there was no heartbeat and the baby had stopped growing. We waited another week to make sure and my RE said that I could m/c naturally. I waited another week, but nothing was happening so I called him and scheduled a D & C. I just couldn't handle this going on for weeks! So, I had a D & C that Friday. I'm glad that I did it that way.
Sending you hugs and blessings of hope for the future.
__________________ Kim (40) DH (47) Proud mom to: my 24 weekers, Lindsey & Sydney (4), weighing 1 lb. 1.5 ounces (498 grams) & 1 lb. 2 ounces (509 grams), 11" long. Cerclage, bedrest & Pre-eclampsia 114 days in the NICU and my heavenly angels: ~Seth Allan~ (1/20/02) @ 19 wks - Incompetent cervix Early m/c (7/20/01) @ 8 wks 1988 - Off BC 1991 - HSG, SA, 6 failed clomid cycles with my first DH 1999 - Remarried 2000 - HSG, SA, Lap, Hysteroscopy, Polyps, PCOS DX 2000-2002 - 1 failed CC & 6 IUI/Gonal-F/Prog/PIO cycles
I'm very sorry for your loss. You may have seen my post that I m/c at around 5 weeks over the holidays, and I can sympathize with your pain. It's just not easy, no matter how far along you are. It's good that you have something (your faith) that you can turn to in times like this. As long as we have some sort of support, it makes it better.
Nicole,I'm very sorry for your loss. I found out yesterday that I had a miscarriage. Beta level dropped down to 10 yesterday . RE told me to come in tomorrow for another HCG test and take it from there. I was 5 weeks, so I think this was a chemical pregnancy, but not sure. Whatever it was, it hurts. The one thing that I'm happy for is that we at least did get pregnant. And, I know that it can happen. Now its just a matter of time until we get there again. I used Femara to induce o and we did an IUI. So, we're going to go for that again next cycle.
General question: Is there a thread, board that is specifically for people that lost early pregnancies? I have been on the TTC boards for a while, but thought that I'd move to a m/c board for a bit b/c i don't want to bring everyone down on the TTC boards--don't get me wrong, they are wonderful and supportive there, but I feel ike I'm "debbie downer" for ppl that have had BFPs and are progressing. Any good threads you know of?
I decided to take the day off to just be sad. I lost my grandmother a week ago so the death, funeral, burial were all happening aroudn the time that I found out I was preg and now that the funeral is over, the pregnancy is over so I feel particularly empty.
__________________ Denise (32)
DH (33)
PCOS Dx'd 5/2005
Met 1500mg/day
Syntrhoid (Hashi's) 25 mcgs / day
Femarra cycle #1 2.5mg day 3-7 O'd 2 follies!
BFP 1/1/07 1st beta 41
M/c 1/8/07
Femara cycle #2 O'd One Follie BFN
Femarra cycle #3--O'd one follie BFN
Femarra cycle #4 BFN
Femara cycle #5 --second chem preg at 13dpo
IVF cycle #1. 2 ET on 7/13. BFP on 7/22--its TWINS!!--really Triplets (one identical twin set, one fraternal twin)
8/21:lost the identical twins @8wks. Still PG w/ one baby EDD: 4/4/08
Hello My name is Sothy, and I I'm so sorry for ur lost(((hugs))) and prayers to all , I have been there in the yr 2003 I lost my twins boys. It was the hardest thing that happen to me , and lady'z let me tell u I have been threw alot in my teen yrs. I felt that I had lost part of my heart and life..... I move to Fl couple yr later and started again , but this time I had docs that didn't care a bit about ur emotions. So I ended that for atless 2yr... I moved back to Delaware and I got back to my obgyn and he convince me to try again. So lady'z here I am this is my first round and is crazy (cry to much)lololo....... well lady'z is a pleasure and blessing that i found this page , in Delaware there's not to much awareness...................
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I am so sorry for your loss. I am coping with one now myself.
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