Diagnosed last week, TTC, DH doesn't want chance of multiples
Hello, everyone! I'm new; just found this site the other day. I went to see the RE last Thursday and she said my bloodwork and my symptoms indicate PCOS; u/s was inconclusive.
She told me to go on the South Beach diet (DH is doing it with me - it's not bad, but I am missing my sweets and dinner rolls during Phase I). She said I need to adopt a better way of eating to keep from becoming diabetic and keeping weight on (size 14 - have been for 10 years).
She did bloodwork to determine if I was ovulating (I'm not - I get AF once/twice a year - I'm not surprised), put me on Progesterone and wants me to start Clomid on Day 1 (insurance is making me jump thru hoops for that ). More bloodwork to follow and a HSG (I don't really want to do this from the horror stories I've heard, but I think I'm going to suck it up).
Here's a problem - DH and I have been TTC for 6 months (we knew we'd get no results based on my cycle history, so we're not surprised). Now that there is a slightly increased risks of twins (we only want 1 child) he's saying he won't try while I'm taking Clomid! He's a big planner and wants to provide the best for our family and we both only want 1 child, so it's not like he's being difficult, just excessively overconcerned. I think 5-10% is a pretty small chance, but we do know people who have done fertility drugs and had twins, so this just kind of makes him leery. He thinks the diet alone with help with the problem (one woman claims it did in the South Beach book, so now it's his shining beacon of hope).
What are your experiences with twins or triplets or more on Clomid? Any other DH's start freaking out and becoming a little irrational?
I don't mean this to sound rude, but have you mentioned to your DH that twins can happen even without any drugs? I made sure to tell my DH that twins run in my side of the family even without drugs. Four women at least in my family have been pregnant with twins in the last 30 years, and none were on any fertility drugs. Some men do freak out about twins (or a single baby being the "wrong sex"), but once they see both little tykes on the u/s they often just melt. HTH
Thanks for the replies! Don't worry, you don't sound rude! Yes, I have pointed that out, but you know how some men can be, they pick and choose what "facts" they actually hear.
He's just a very big planner - I can't stress that enough; he's not big on surprises. He can't get past the numbers - I think we read on some PCOS site that the chances of twins for a "regular, normal pregnancy" were something like 1% and the the chances with Clomid are 10 times that (does that sound true or factual?).
He can be very pig-headed and stubborn. I'm much more of a go-with-the-flow kind of person; he's a Type-A. If we don't plan for it, it doesn't happen (unless it's an emergency - like when our dog broke his leg and we had to find a "spare" $3,000 to treat him - things like that happen and it's over with within a year and you deal with it - kids have to be provided for for 18 years at a minimum - much harder to do, at least with the expectations we have). We've been setting aside a certain sum of money in our savings for the past few months for 1 child because that's what we realistically realize we can afford to provide for a child (plus we both would really only prefer to have 1 child ideally).
On the positive, though, DH has dropped almost 10 lbs. since we started the diet. I haven't gotten on the scale yet tonight, but everything fits looser, so I know it's working!
Originally posted by pixelroscoe
He's just a very big planner - I can't stress that enough; he's not big on surprises. He can't get past the numbers - I think we read on some PCOS site that the chances of twins for a "regular, normal pregnancy" were something like 1% and the the chances with Clomid are 10 times that (does that sound true or factual?).
He can be very pig-headed and stubborn. I'm much more of a go-with-the-flow kind of person; he's a Type-A. If we don't plan for it, it doesn't happen
Keep replying!
My DH is an IT guy, but not big on planning at all. He is go with the flow, and I want to plan, but am short-sighted on a lot of things. Right now DD is 11 months and we are discussing Kindergarden costs and shopping for schools, and yet winter snuck up on us and my Mom had to go out and get a coat for DD for this weekend LOL
More pregnancies are twins than most people realize. I watched a documentary on this, and it's amazing how many women are never told they had two early on, and only ended up giving birth to one. At least three women in my family were PG with twins, but each gave birth to only one son.
Thanks for the reply! Can you clarify (if you feel comfortable)? What do you mean the women were PG w/twins, but only had 1? Did they lose one, have a wrong u/s reading or did they selectively alter the twins they were carrying?
My RE said they can "reduce the number of triplets down to twins" if the woman wishes (under the guise of "for the well-being of the other fetuses") at the hospital I have to go to, but they prefer not to do it with twins. BTW, personally, I wouldn't consider this for twins or triplets - I'm very pro-choice, but not to this degree; I know of quite a few healthy triplets.
An IT guy, huh? Mine's a Sr. Software Engineer - very "logistical" and "numbers-oriented"! Funny how he's "logically" viewing the 10% chance!
My DH is a senior software engineer too. But, he is not numbers oriented. He loves the analitical part of IT, but hates the numbers, lol
There is a documentary on "dissappearing twins" that is very interesting. I think I saw it on the Discovery Channel 6 months ago or so. It's more common than people think, and many women do not know what happens to the one twin, or that they were even pregnant with twins. Some people find out in adulthood that they are carrying around their deceased twin.
The women in my family are almost all very pro-life. None would or could choose between two lives. One twin died between the 1st and 2nd u/s. One twin was a "dissappearing twin" and died inside his brother's body. The third I just found out about a couple weeks ago. All the mother said was that she was carrying twins, but one died. I cannot believe I hadn't heard that one before because the twin that survived was my best friend when we were toddlers, and he is only a few months younger than I am. Only one woman in our family could carry both twins to term. Twins do run in my family, but carrying both twins to term does not. M/C of single babies in my family is very rare though. I can only think of maybe three instances of single m/c in over 30 years of my family's history.
Clomid actually only increases your chances of have twins about 3 to 6% over the general population. You would probably have about a 10% or slightly more of having twins on clomid. Triplets or more remains the same chance as the general population. I only took one dose of clomid and was on glucophage (metformin) and had twins, but I have a family history of fraternal twins, so it could've happend for me either way.
If you are concerned about the taking clomid and having multiples thing, ask about taking glucophage. I took it to get my cycles going and then I added the clomid. One thing about some PCOS women, once your body figures out what is supposed to be doing, sometimes it does it a little too well and you spit out a couple more eggs than needed. I would definately ask your doc about glucophage first and then go on to clomid.
Hope some of this helped!
Chelle
__________________ Me 32 DH Mike 31
DX: 9/2/03
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Diagnosed last week, TTC, DH doesn't want chance of multiples 
). More bloodwork to follow and a HSG (I don't really want to do this from the horror stories I've heard, but I think I'm going to suck it up).
Thanks for the replies 
