I think this is the first post I've started on the depression board. It looks like the depression is slipping back up on me. Hope you don't mind if I vent a little bit here, but I feel like I'm going crazy. I have a great family that has always been really close. I mean, my cousins and I grew up like sisters. My entire family is great, but I feel like I need to get away from them. I have a career that I find very rewarding and fullfilling (I'm a nurse), but I have to drag myself into work even after a few days off. I feel like I'd enjoy it more somewhere else. I'm even ready to kick DBF to the curb. Things haven't been the greatest between us lately, and I think i'm finally starting to realize that it's really not going to work out, but I'm afraid there won't be anyone else who will want me. I've really been thinking about just walking away from everything and going somewhere else and starting over. Does anyone else feel like this, or am I really crazy? Will it get better without packing up and moving to Florida? Thanks for letting me vent. I have no one here to really talk to, and I know my cysters understand.
__________________ Sandy-29. Single and actually liking it at the moment.
Mommy to a 70 pound lap dog, my big boxer baby Tyson and a 15 year old blind shih tzu.
Diagnosed with PCOS in 2003.
Medications include Lamictal 100 mg, Lexapro 20 mg, and Trazadone 150 mg for Bipolar Disorder. Starting Femcon Sept '08. Gotta get this big ugly PCOS monster back under control!
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Hello!
Well, although it may seem like the thing to do....I think you might be a little unhappy once you are there. I know exactly what you mean, I feel that way myself sometimes! But imagine being there, your close loved ones (although you do need a break from them) so far away. Maybe it would be what you want, lol, I don't know....but I know that sometimes what sounds good on a whim is not what we really need or truthfully want either.
Just wanted you to know I know how you feel and hope you are feeling better soon! Are you on anything for depression?
I have always been an advocator of it, but just today picked up my first RX of wellbutrin SR! I always thought "well I don't need that, but so and so does" Finally I realized that if you are sad,moody,glum more than you are happy......it's TIME! lol
Sorry to ramble. Hope you are feeling better soon!
__________________ Hypothyroid
PCOS
IR/glucose intolerance
Fianlly was able to conceive 2 children!
The only thing I want to say is, you have a lot to offer. You are an educated hard working woman. My mom is a nurse and so I know. And there are a lot of pressures in that field. Do not waste your time with a man that you think it is not going to work out with. You deserve to have everything you want and don't settle for someone when you have so much to offer. I'm assuming that is a picture of you holding the child, so I can also say that your cute too. And you don't have to settle. Gail
Thanks for the replies. Things are really crazy at work, and I've barely talked to my boyfriend in the past month. I really hoped we'd be engaged by now, not breaking up. My sister and I are trying to plan a weekend getaway to try to regather outselves, but it doesn't look like it can happen until May. Maybe I can make it until then. I've started thinking about going back to school too. I'm an LPN right now, but I want to go back for an RN. I'm just not sure that I want to do it here. I still may make a move after I get some more money saved up. I really need a new car right now, so that's going to come first I think.
Blessed...I'm not on anything at the present, but I have taken Prozac, Remeron, and Nortriptyline.
Gail...That is me holding my cousin's baby, Dylan. I so wish he was mine! (I guess that's something else that's got me down. I am really ready to have a baby, and I thought my BF would be the one I would have children with.) Anyway, I'm going to try to attach a new picture. I hope this works.
__________________ Sandy-29. Single and actually liking it at the moment.
Mommy to a 70 pound lap dog, my big boxer baby Tyson and a 15 year old blind shih tzu.
Diagnosed with PCOS in 2003.
Medications include Lamictal 100 mg, Lexapro 20 mg, and Trazadone 150 mg for Bipolar Disorder. Starting Femcon Sept '08. Gotta get this big ugly PCOS monster back under control!
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Thanks for the replies. Things are really crazy at work and I've barely talked to my boyfriend in the past month. I was really hoping we would be engaged by now, not breaking up. My sister and I are trying to plan a weekend getaway together, but it appears it can't happen until May. Maybe I can make it to then. I'm also thinking about going back to school. I'm an LPN right now, but I want to go back for an RN. I'm saving up for a car right now, but after I save up some more money, I'm still thinking about moving. I'm just not sure where. It could be a different house, or it could be a different state. I'm already trying to research where my nursing license will transfer too.
Blessed...I'm not on anything at present. I have taken Prozac, Remeron, and nortriptyline in the past.
Gail...That is me holding my cousin's baby, Dylan. I so wish he was mine. I think that's another thing that's got me down. I am so ready to have a baby, but I thought my BF would be the one I'd be having children with. It looks like that's not going to happen now. All of my plans for the future just seemed to fall apart. Anyway, I am going to try to post a newer pic of me. Hope this works.
__________________ Sandy-29. Single and actually liking it at the moment.
Mommy to a 70 pound lap dog, my big boxer baby Tyson and a 15 year old blind shih tzu.
Diagnosed with PCOS in 2003.
Medications include Lamictal 100 mg, Lexapro 20 mg, and Trazadone 150 mg for Bipolar Disorder. Starting Femcon Sept '08. Gotta get this big ugly PCOS monster back under control!
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
That didn't come out like I wanted it too, at least not on my computer. Let me try it again.
__________________ Sandy-29. Single and actually liking it at the moment.
Mommy to a 70 pound lap dog, my big boxer baby Tyson and a 15 year old blind shih tzu.
Diagnosed with PCOS in 2003.
Medications include Lamictal 100 mg, Lexapro 20 mg, and Trazadone 150 mg for Bipolar Disorder. Starting Femcon Sept '08. Gotta get this big ugly PCOS monster back under control!
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
It sounds as though there is a lot going on in your life. A life that you perceived to be different isn't happening. Some of your goals arent' being met because of the lack of committment you are feeling. Have you talked to your bf about your feelings and goals and wanting a baby? Is he willing and just doesn't realize it's that important to you? Communication is so important. If you have and he is unwilling you have some big decisions to make. We will be here, not to tell you what to do, but to listen to you. Feel free, always to come here and ask questions or vent. Hugs, lendi
__________________ It's ok to cry if you're sad. Tears are God's little safety valve.
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Thank you. Dylan always makes me smile! That pic was taken at Christmas. Unfortunately, it seems that DBF and I are pretty much history now. I've tried calling him, and he seems to be avoiding me. All I can say about that is, it's his problem. Of course it hurts, but I haven't done anything wrong to make him do this to me. He's done this before, though. He just disappeared once for three months. It took a while, but we got everything worked out. I just can't do that this time. He is the one guy I could always count on to be there, and now he's gone. I guess I'm just meant to be alone. I've had a few days off work, and all my dad can say is 'when are you going back to work?'. I don't even feel like he wants me around any more. Everyone at home is in such a bad mood. I can't even stand to leave my room right now. I feel like I'm trapped in a big hole and there's no way out. It just keeps getting deeper and darker. Would anyone else describe it like that? It just feels like the whole world is closing in on me and i'm not sure that I can take it. I'm going on a gambling getaway next weekend. At least I'll have a little time away from work and home. Sorry this got so long. I don't want to bring the rest of you down with me. I just don't have anyone else to talk to anymore. Thanks for listening, cysters.
__________________ Sandy-29. Single and actually liking it at the moment.
Mommy to a 70 pound lap dog, my big boxer baby Tyson and a 15 year old blind shih tzu.
Diagnosed with PCOS in 2003.
Medications include Lamictal 100 mg, Lexapro 20 mg, and Trazadone 150 mg for Bipolar Disorder. Starting Femcon Sept '08. Gotta get this big ugly PCOS monster back under control!
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.