Does everyone get depressed around there would be due date?

claire75 · 04-17-2003, 07:53 AM

The DD we lost in october would have been due on the 25th which is also my birthday....
I`m really feeling low about it....I was really hoping to be pregnant again before then....not that it would cover the loss of our other babies but to soften the blow.

Nobody except DH likes me to mention our angel babies I can tell it makes them uncomfortable. I just feel like everyone else has forgotten they ever existed. Is it just me being over sensitive?

Sometimes I just feel the need to talk about them just needed to get this off my chest

airforcewifeynva · 04-17-2003, 09:30 AM

You are definitely not alone! I would have had one baby due next month and I have 2 in July. Not too sure about one due date but Dallas was delivered on July 15. Three angel babies within 3 months of each other. My birthday is coming up in a couple weeks. Actually my birthday is the first weekend in May, then Mother's Day is the next weekend. Every holiday is hard for me. Not just the due dates. I like to talk about my babies and like you DH is the only one who will listen to me talk about them. We just have to hang in there and do the best we can. Just wanted to say that you are not alone. Hang in there.

Tammygrrl · 04-17-2003, 11:01 AM

i don't get depressed around the due date, but when i see a child who is the age mine were supposed to be...it hurts. i remember this one little girl who was born in the same week my first lost baby was due. i'd run into her mother at school functions or the grocery store and i'd look at that baby and take note of how big she's gotten and when she started walking, i'd say to myself...my little baby would be walking now. it was quite sad. when i think of them now, i try to think happy thoughts and i'm comforted by the fact that they're in heaven waiting for me and their daddy and their big sisters and brother.

MaLee · 04-18-2003, 05:13 PM

I think most who have fought to get pg then miscarry get sad around the due date. I know I did and still get sad at times. TWo days ago I was reading the paper and saw the birth accouncements from teh hospital where I would have delievered. The time period of which I would have delievered was in there - I wanted to cry - I was kinda depressed the rest of the night. It's completely normal.
I think sometimes that others try to avoid it because in general most people try to avoid anything sad and depressing. Most people like to think "happy thoughts". Human nature kinda thing.
You can always come to this forum when you need to - that's what we are here for - to lend a shoulder and ear.

cystermoon · 04-19-2003, 10:13 PM

Absolutely. My DD EDD is also April 25th--how sad to see another one of my cysters who was pg when I was also lost a baby in October. (((HUGS)))

I am dreading the day like anything although I am trying really hard to look at it as a celebration of her life in Heaven than her death on Earth. I still get weepy on St. Patrick's Day because my second baby was due on March 17th and that has been 6 years now. My first child was due on our friends' DS b-day so that makes it rough to celelbrate his birthday too. I get hung up on dates, as well as seeing pg people or babies. It's all very normal and completely understandable.

You can pm any time if you feel like talking. I have 3 angel babies and I know how it is to want to talk about them when others don't seem to want to listen.

Jeri · 04-19-2003, 11:07 PM

I was just about to post this question myself. I think it is normal to be sad to some degree.

I realized a few months ago that my would be due date was right around Mother's Day. I don't know why it never occurred to me while I was pregnant! I'm not sure how I will handle this May 11th. It is definitely a double whammy. I find myself not thinking about my miscarriage most of the time, but as the ex-due date approaches, I think about it more.

I am very concerned that I will have a hard time with that entire weekend (we will be at my MIL where my dear nephew lives) and that no one will understand. I don't even think any of my family realizes what that day is. I'm not even sure I should bring it up. I'd rather not have every one walk on egg shells around me.

May we all find peace in our own time.

MichelleJ · 04-20-2003, 01:06 AM

My first baby was due on January 7, 2002, and for me that day came and went without me giving it a second thought, it was the day after that I cried, because I forget the baby's birthday. My second baby was due October 18, 2003, and on my Halmark calendar it is "The Sweetest Day", which I know when that day comes will be harder than I will ever know, because it is a Saturday and I am usually home most of the day alone. I don't think the miscarriage dates are all that important to me, because with the 2nd pregnancy, when I started to miscarry, I was asked over and over when was the first one. I know that I want to be pregnant by October 18, so maybe the day won't be so hard. Being said is natural. Even Jesus weaped.

beth30 · 04-22-2003, 04:18 PM

I can't wait for April to be over with because this is when I was due. My birthday is also in April and I would've been due right around then. I've gotten this way around every due date I would've had (3 miscarriages). It also hurts to see people with babies that were born when mine would've been. I don't feel I can really talk about it to any of my family because they'd rather sweep it all under the rug. DH doesn't see any reason to talk about it because that's all in the past. I feel like I'm bothering him or I'm being silly and stupid when I tell him how sad I still am. Same thing with my family. I know they don't mean to be this way, but it still hurts. The thing that helps me is that I talk about it anyway, especially to DH. That's what he's there for, right. One thing that I plan on doing to remember my babies by is to purchase a crystal cross and then have the dates that I lost them engraved on the back of the cross.

I am so thankful that I have places like this and cysters like you to share my thoughts with when I'm feeling down.

Claire, Hang in there. Know that you're never alone and can always find an ear to listen to you here at SC. Never feel bad about being sad you lost your baby.

Beth

isitmytimeyet · 04-24-2003, 02:57 PM

I think about it too. My 1st one would be 8 now. I for some reason don't think about how old the 2nd one would have been but for the 3rd one I have my godson to remind me because they were a couple of weeks apart-so that one would be going on 5 now. The 4th one would have been my June summertime baby due this year, and the 5th would be my Christmas baby this year. I always have a HARD time getting through Mother's Day and the Christmas season when it's all about children. Some years I have even refused to participate in the festivities. I feel like no one understands how deep our pain is or how long it can lasts.