I don't know really where this falls into, thread-wise, but I'll feel better for posting on here in general. Kinda long also, more for my benefit than anything--
Last week we finally got the word my IVF cycle (the one and only covered at 50% by insurance) didn't stick. I had 3 EXCELLENT embroys transferred - 1 more than my RE wanted, but we did 3 anyways - all highest quality 9-10 cell transferred on day 3. None of the other embryos grew out to where they could be frozen and transferred later. After breaking down in tears at the pharmacy when I picked up my Gonal-F at the start of this cycle, I decided this would be it for any further treatments. My first HCG #'s were very, very low, and the 3rd one 4 days after the 2nd level were lower, and AF came today so the IVF was officially a bust.
We have been TTC for 3 years, including a year naturally with regular cycles. My feeling is, if something would have worked, it would've worked by now. My 2nd IUI cycle produced 6 good eggs - that didn't work. My IVF - couldn't have gone better except for no embryos sticking. There is no reason why things haven't been able to work and they're not. We're done.
Between $$$$$ and me and DH's emotions, there's no way I'd survive any other infertility treatments without completely losing it. I'm sad nothing worked, but in a way I'm relieved I'm done with running back and forth a few times a week for ultrasounds, the hormones and all the other medications, and the uncertainty of not knowing, being hopeful and then getting that hope crushed when AF shows up or I get a call from the RE's office - "I'm sorry, I've got some bad news."
What we're going to do now is still up in the air -- we're working on telling family members first, and then I'll work up to telling my coworkers (who are wonderful, but I work with about 60 very well intentioned people who are great, but there are 60 of them and I'll probably tell a few and then field responses from the rest of them). Telling coworkers will have to wait until I can get through a "we're done TTC" statement without crying. I hate crying at work. Any other decisions will be after the first of the year. I need a few months off.
Yes, this is a huge disappointment since getting married and starting a family are just things you expect wil happen, and when one doesn't follow another it can put you in a very unhappy place.
For any of you still with me here, thank you for letting me get this out in the open. And for those of you still TTC, good luck on your journey and I wish you the best.
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To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Mom to Zachary Philip, born 9/7/09
So sorry to hear that. I wish you the best, and hope that one day, just by accident, while you and your hubby are enjoying and loving each other, you happen to get lucky!!!!!!
Deciding to end TTC is a hard one, and I wish you well.
__________________ Hi my name is Bunni, and I POAS waaay to much.
Me 37 DH 42 To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
TTC #1(After 2 1/2 year break)
Met 1000mg Various Supplements
Healthy Eating and trying so hard to exercise.
Will consider fertility meds after first of the year.
Cyster *~SugarPlums~* sent me my first bit of Sunshine! 10/06/07
Since September 18, 2007 I have lost.... To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
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i'm sry ur IVF didn't take. i am a believer in things happening when u stop trying or looking for them. just reading your post brought tears to my eyes. However it happens now, i hope you get the family you want a deserve and find some kind of joy in this hard time ahead.
__________________ You were meant to shine on...
Type 1 and type 2 Diabetes
PCOS
Bipolar disorder
Anxiety disorder
I can only begin to imagine what a hard decision this is. I hope that you find peace in your decision, and that a miracle finds its way to your family in some way that you least expect!
__________________ Nicole (32)+ DH (33) Married June 4, 2000 my blog! To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
dx PCOS Fall 2000 TTC since Sept 2006 1st BFP Dec 2006 lost @8 weeks To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Sparks - we also gave up. Although I wasn't even able to cope with the idea of IVF I have been through the drilling and also had a m/c.
However we have adopted very successfully. I never thought I would feel so protective and maternal of a child as I do about my son (who is now nearly as tall as me at 11 yo).
I only post this because there are other ways to build your family besides TTC and it is the best decision I ever made.
We never even TTC, just looked at our odds, figured they sucked, and went straight to adoption. It was the best decision we ever made. It can be much easier and less expensive than most people think.
I'm so sorry for all your problems TTC. Is adoption an option for you?
__________________ Kati (29)
DH Vince (27)
Married 1-29-05 To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Never TTC -- Straight to Adoption
DD Yuna
Born in the USA 10-01-06 -- Finalized 4-12-07
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Still hoping and praying to adopt #2 someday... To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
*hugs* I'm so sorry you had to come to that decision. I hope I don't have to, but maybe with the stress off of you, it'll happen naturally!
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Laura (27) To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. James (32)
Zoe Cassandra is here! Born 9/21/09 at 6:12pm MST. She weighed in at 7lbs, 5.5oz's, 19.5 inches! To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
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done with TTC 
