I am trying to stay positive today and think of the twins with a smile. I had started a shadow box back in September when I lost them and never finished it because I couldn't find the RIGHT quote or poem or thought. None of them fit the way I felt. When I look at the box right now you would never know it was for a miscarriage, it just looks like a baby shadow box. I want it to be up in the nursery for our future babies. So I need a quote that will say something about the twins but also about how God has a plan.
I feel like I will KNOW when I see it, but still havent found it yet. I do like the poem about the child that was born because the parents didnt give up. I was going to use it in scrapbook page for my future child. I just want something simple and sweet.
ANY IDEAS?
I had a meltdown yesterday and I am blaming it on the clomid and stress. Doing better today. But yesterday I was trying to think of ways to end my life. About 20 minutes of sheer desperation. DH even confided that he has been thinking about dying too. We were able to talk and make each other feel better.
__________________ Stacia 31-DH 36 Married since April 1997 Angel baby twins Sept. 05 To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
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Tested positive for antiphospholipid antibodies, Heparin/Aspirin therapy for next pregnancy
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Just wanted to send you hugs - I know how hard anniversaries can be. I will look for my poems, and might be able to enter some later tonight.
Kath
__________________ dx pcos and IR 12/02
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Mom to 3 angels (2 1st trimester miscarriages & 1 full term stillborn) and 2 grade schoolers
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Stacia,
I know personally how hard due dates can be. first, here's a virtual hug here is a link to a special poem someone sent to me at my first due date. http://www.geocities.com/babiesinheaven/mother.htm
I babysat the kids I watch every day and I went shopping for some charms to put on a bracelet I can wear everyday for my angel babies. Had a hard time finding something.
My OB called today to figure out my ultrasound for tomorrow. I couldn't talk to him without crying. That ultrasound room has bad memories. He is going to do them and not charge us! So grateful! I am finishing up my shadow box and going to hang it up tonight or tomorrow. Thanks for the hugs. I guess I have one more due date to go through. Hopefully that will be the last due date with no baby in my arms. I saw so many pregnant ladies today, three in Walmart. I just want to be pregnant again so I feel like I am going to be a mom someday.
__________________ Stacia 31-DH 36 Married since April 1997 Angel baby twins Sept. 05 To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
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Tested positive for antiphospholipid antibodies, Heparin/Aspirin therapy for next pregnancy
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I have rings with my kids birthstones in them - I chose the month that they were due in. I also have a necklace with angel birthstone charms. Just a thought.
Hope that all goes well with the ultrasound tomorrow.
Kath
__________________ dx pcos and IR 12/02
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Mom to 3 angels (2 1st trimester miscarriages & 1 full term stillborn) and 2 grade schoolers
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My mom got me a charm bracelet for my birthday. It has a 4 leaf clover charm, the same one that's on the gown Eric is buried in. It also has an angel disc, and a Jesus charm with a blue heart. Eric's birthstone is a blue topaz. When I can try again, DH is going to get me a Follow Your Dreams one.
I hope you find the perfect quote or poem for your box.
__________________ Molly
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BFP 12/23/08 M/C at appr. 5-8 weeks-nothing on the u/s To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
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Stacia. I hope you find a good poem. I'll look through all my stuff.
Check out silentgrief.com - maybe there are some good poems there...
Also, the first 3 months I took Clomid, I didn't have mood swings, but the 2nd 3 month-stretch where I took Clomid, I had WILD mood swings, including some thoughts where I wish I could "Fall asleep and not wake up." (I couldn't admit to myself I wanted to die - but I wanted to escape.) As soon as I stopped taking the Clomid my moods got better. Please don't think like that; I know you have MUCH to live for...please have some hope...
Nicole-thanks for taking the time to post. you are sweet. Sorry you had a due date too.
Lovepotato-Where did you get your charms? I wanted jewelry type charms.
Kath-Thanks for being sweet to me, it means a lot. I also noticed your weight loss! WOW! You are doing GREAT! I am at your beginning weight and trying to find a way to loose weight while I am getting pregnant, being pregnant, losing babies in the last 8 months. I am just trying to eat healthier and veggies every day! Keep up the good work!
Thanks Meghan- I didn't think the clomid would ever effect me. It never had. Glad to know it can happen after several clomid cycles! This is my 5th cycle with clomid. I was taking 150 mg though, so maybe that much effected me. Anyway, feeling more hopeful today. Just going to my ultrasound was so relieving. I am back on the road that will lead to a baby, my baby. Actively TTC! Feels so much better. DR could only find my right ovary, and it had like 6 follicles. All around the same size. So on Monday I have another u/s and will see how many are growing well. DH is saying we are going to have Octuplets! Jokingly of course!
__________________ Stacia 31-DH 36 Married since April 1997 Angel baby twins Sept. 05 To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
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Tested positive for antiphospholipid antibodies, Heparin/Aspirin therapy for next pregnancy
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Stacia - I remember telling DH "The doctor said Clomid would cause mood swings but I didn't have them." SURPRISE! I was at the same dose on Rounds 2 and 3 of TTC as I was on Round 1, but the change was wild. I would just cry and cry at night, the days I took the pills...it was horrible. Hang in there, it will get better! Glad the u/s went OK.
Gina-Thanks for my FIRST gift! Very sweet! You are a gem!
__________________ Stacia 31-DH 36 Married since April 1997 Angel baby twins Sept. 05 To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Angel baby girl Neve Jan. 06 To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
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Tested positive for antiphospholipid antibodies, Heparin/Aspirin therapy for next pregnancy
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((Hugs)). Due dates are hard enough without Clomid screwing with your hormones! I hope you're able to find some way to honor your angels and find some peace.
Stacia I just wanted to let you know that I'm thinking about you and praying for you. Due dates and milestones are so so hard.
(((Big Hugs coming your way)))
Stacia-Sorry I haven't written back yet. I tried to use my mom's PC, but it's ancient, and I haven't been to the library.
I got my charm bracelet from Walmart, along with the charms. I think almost anywhere carries them. You could also try Ebay.
I hope you're doing okay.
__________________ Molly
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BFP 12/23/08 M/C at appr. 5-8 weeks-nothing on the u/s To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
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