Durham CAS ??? and still trying??

JenniferEnsoll · 02-08-2008, 01:19 PM

Ok so we have just opened our file for adoption and are still actively TTC#2.
I have taken another dose of the "drugs" this month but do not know how the next couple months will go.
What do I tell the agency? Is it better to be honest? Or will they not consider us if we are still trying?
It has been 14 months of hard core drugs and 3 years unprotected....

I am really scared that they are going to say that we need to have stopped...even though I may not take drugs I won't officially stop.
It has never mattered how my children come into my life however sometimes I worry that I am giving up to easily.

I'm excited and scared all at the same time.

Jenn

dna · 02-08-2008, 01:52 PM

Given it can take YEARS to see any movement on your file with CAS I wouldnt mention it...if/when you become pregnant you can withdraw your application to adopt...

Dishonest ? yes .. and some people may not agree but in my experience with having my file there for a few years and not seeing ANYTHING at all .. no proposals etc we really should have gotten on with ours lives.

Good luck !

JenniferEnsoll · 02-08-2008, 01:57 PM

Amy
After you guys took the classes how long did you wait before you gave up?
Do you mind these personal questions on her or can I PM you?

What age were you guys looking for and were you willing to accept any circumstances?

I am in for the long haul as I stated I would like many children and doesn't matter in which order.
I too just wanted to get the process started so that at least we were in there being considered, know what I mean.

I know my FOO is not happy. My parents said "OH" when I told them, but my brother and sister and all their family is very happy for us. I should say my MIL is very happy too.

Guess well just have to wait and see.....I know what I would say Im just worried that my husband will tell them in private meeting that he is hoping to have a natural child. I guess wha'ts mean't to be will be....

Jenn

dna · 02-09-2008, 02:02 PM

We wait 2 years ? then got kicked out of the program being told we would have to do the homestudy etc all over again...when i told my social worker that she couldnt believe it ..

i dont mind all the questions .. i just dont have much faith in the cas system .. then again my friend was able to adopt an 18 month old after not to long a wait so it all depends on what you are willing to accept (their son is perfect) and the ages...

i hope it all works out for you though and dont hesitate to contact me even if its just to chat ! LOL