Feeling the pull (long post-sorry!)

Harleywv · 03-29-2005, 05:45 PM

Hi! This is going to be kind of long, but I hope you'll bear with me. I was saved about 10 years ago right after DH and I got married. Then about 2 years ago, we started having a lot of problems and ended up separating in April 2003 and divorcing in July 2003. DH's mom is very religious and prayed constantly that we would be able to work things out. I had pretty much written off any hope of reconciliation and stopped going to church. I felt very hurt by the fact that the church that I had gone to for 8 years did not call, write, visit, nothing, during this extremely hard time in my life. My DD was not quite 2 at the time, and DH left her care solely to me.

Anyway, we did finally get to a point, past the anger, and were able to work things out. He moved back in around October 2003. We have been living together ever since, still not remarried. So....to get to the point. I have been feeling like I really need to get back in church. My DD is now 3 1/2 and goes to Sunday school every Sunday morning and children's church every Wednesday evening with DH's mom. I feel that I should be the one to take her and to set an example by being in church. We went to church and to an Easter play on Easter and I really felt like I should go to the alter and rededicate my life. HOwever, pride and shyness kept me from doing it. I don't think that DH is ready to do anything as far as that goes, and I don't know that I'd be strong enough to regularly attend church without him. Also, my DD goes to the church that we always went to and loves it there. BUT, I feel that they were completely unsupportive of me, and have a hard time going back there.

Any advice? What should I do? God has given me so many blessings in my life and I truly recognize that all that I have comes from Him. My DD, my reconciliation with DH, finances, etc. I am truly blessed. I want to live right, but there are so many pulls in other directions. Thanks for reading this long, long post!

HISIRISHGEM · 03-29-2005, 06:11 PM

It's time to find another church! While pastors and people shouldn't be the ultimate reason you go to church....they are there to have fellowship with. The idea of a church family is to give you what you don't have in the world...which is loving friendship in faith with Christ. With emphasis on teaching you how to be a "woman of faith", your child to live the life God wants for her and your husband to have other men who understands what he goes through as well. My opinion is that if you don't teach your dd the principals of a Christian life, later in her life she may find other teachings that aren't Truth. Your dd needs to know that life won't always be easy! She needs her Heavenly Father to walk with during these times....just like you do. You lost your way, but you can get back on the road. Your right in not going back to that church, but you need to find one you feel comfortable in that will have a good foundation based on the Bible, and that will have good mentors to help you with your walk, a good program for your dd, and even a mens program for WHEN your dh gets back into the church. YOU may have to be the one to rededicate your life and walk alone with God. Pray for your DH and let God do the work in Him. It seems as if He's already been envolved in your life. I'm sure it was something more devine to help you reconcile your relationship with your husband. You both should be proud .......God definately as the upperhand already in your relationship. You just need to allow Him back into your life.

Look for some churches around you....check out their principals online to make sure their biblically correct and sound doctrine. Go! Pray that God will give you strength to go regularly to strengthen your faith, your marriage, your dd's relationship with Him...and to find & trust new Christian friends. Give them a chance! Not everyone is like that.....open yourself up to the Lord and He will open the doors for you!

Pamela · 04-02-2005, 11:39 PM

I agree about finding a new church.
And about praying praying, praying!! Keeping in mind that God may have a different plan for you than what YOUR plan is!!!!!
Pam

sasha299 · 04-04-2005, 12:12 AM

I have to say, have you made yourself apart of the church?? I ask because I have been to many churches where I go and sit in the back of the church and shake hands as it becomes time to leave and run out the door, never telling anyone my name or anything more. When I found the church I felt right in I introduced myself, I dedicated myself to being a part of the church, I felt enveloped into the community.

HISIRISHGEM · 04-04-2005, 01:21 AM

Same with me...I resisted the church we're at because it was so BIG! For 6 months DH went by himself...then i finally went to Adult Bible Fellowship where we met alot of loving people. To this day we're in that group of 50 and our church is about 2000 members with more that are non members. Growing everyday. Look for a church thats growing. No root, no fruit my old pastor used to say!