feeling trapped

moonshadow · 09-25-2002, 03:38 PM

i really don't want to do anything today. this feeling has slowly been mounting for a week or so. it comes and goes. i have to go to class soon, but thinking about that makes me want to go back to bed. i'm sure i'll be okay once i get going with my day, but part of me doesn't want to start feeling okay, just because i'm doing other things. part of me wants the luxury to mope about in bed all day feeling blah. that makes me feel stuck. i just want to cry. there's no time to though. if i don't keep moving, then i sink. it would be lovely to be able to sink. let go of responsibility. i've already let my apartment get messy. i want it clean, but i don't have the energy. i feel disgusted every time i look at it. dh is at work all the time, i'm at school and work all the time- we never get to see each other, and we still don't have the money to do a proper grocery shopping, and this month i have to try and borrow from my mum so we can pay all our bills. it's not normally like this, but it's usually very close. i can't wait until i can move to a place with a better cost of living, but we have to wait until i finish school. school is what's supposed to make life have more opportunities, but it is sure is making me feel trapped right now.

TxLady · 09-25-2002, 04:38 PM

I know exactly how you are feeling - I think we all have been there at some point in our lives. Just about a month ago, DH and I had a run of bad luck with our air conditioner, and it threw our budget off pretty badly. We had to buy diapers and formula for our newborn daughter, so it was slim pickens for us.

Things will improve - they always have a way of working out. The best advice I can give is to just take one day at a time. And when you have a free minute, take a hot bubble bath and indulge yourself in a book. It always helps me forget the outside world!

moonshadow · 09-25-2002, 11:10 PM

thanks. i'm feeling much better this evening.