I was diagnosed with PCOS about 3 weeks ago. When the Doctors told me I felt like a ton a bricks fell on me. I'm happy to know that I finally am getting answers to what is going on with my body, but frustrated and overwhelmed. I never had acne until I had my daughter who is now 8 years old, my cycles never regular, last period lasted 5 weeks, and I sometimes go without a period for months. I get very discouraged when I'm around people. I feel like they are focused on the acne and not me.
I hate looking in the mirror because of the constant reminder of my condition. I feel disgusted with the way I look. I don't feel sexy.
My husband says that I am beautiful and that it really isn't that bad, but it is hard for me to see it the way he does. Sometimes I just want to crawl into a corner and cry, because I feel like noone truelly understands what I'm going through. When people ask me what's wrong I don't want to open up, because I feel as if I'm wasting my words.
Hi Malissa. I am newly diagnosed with pcos in sept 08. I have gotten the mild acne so I can't understand totally about that, but I have put on 70lbs. I am disgusted with my body. I feel like all people see is a fat person. I don't feel like a fat person on the inside, I feel like a very very sad version of the old me. I don't feel sexy to me or my husband, how can he want to be with a person like me? Fat, moody, and depressed some of the time. So I can't understand the acne part but I can understand the feeling of being ashamed of oneself. I can understand not talking to anyone about it because how can they really understand when you yourself don't completly get it. I am sorry that you are going through this and I wish that none of us had to feel this way. It just doesn't seem fair. It just doesn't. I don't know what else to tell you other than hang in there and I really hope it gets better for you.
I really hope you get the support you need. I know my husband has times where he doesn't understand it and others where he does his best. The only thing you can do is try to stay positive about it, even though most days I know that is impossible. Try to help make yourself feel better in other ways. Get a pedicure, get your hair done, or try a little retail clearance shopping. I love finding good deals. Today I found the fisher price plug in jungle swing for $15 at a thrift shop, it was brand new basically, and it retails for over $120. I know its not much advice but I know how you feel. If you ever need someone to talk to feel free to email me anytime on here.
You are actually quite pretty, I would never suspect that you have PCOS. Be thankful,and blessed that you don't have acne, facial hair or are overweight, or have diabetes.
Ashley,
Thank you for the advice! I think I will definently go get a pedicure. My hair is in shamples and in need of a hair cut. I will probably go take care of myself. I know I should probably do this more often, but it's so hard to find the time between work and family. I think a few hours won't hurt.
Celie9,
You are so kind. Thank you for the comment. I think my camera just takes decent pictures. I have suffered from (painful) acne for years. I have lots of little scars on my cheeks and jaw line that won't fade but are hidden with makeup. I weigh 148 lbs. I think I carry it mostly in my rear, breasts, and midsection. My weight has teter tottered for many years. When I got with my husband 11 years ago I was 110 lbs. Just recently I lost 22 lbs. This has been an accomplishment for me, but also a long battle. I am blessed that I don't have diabetes but I am insulin resistant and taking 850 mg metformin 2x's a day. I hate the way it makes my stomach feel, but I know that I need to take it to manage the resistance. As for the facial hair, I know I don't have an excess amount but I do have to wax my lip once a week. I know that the symptoms could be a lot worse, but I still feel very uncomfortable in my skin.
You are not alone. There are days I can't stand to look in a mirror because I'm disgusted at the way I look. If I didn't have such a sweet husband I'm not sure where I'd be right now. Prolly somewhere crying. Eh. I hope this crap gets easier.<-- me lol
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I applaud you on your accomplishments, I myself feel more inspired in my battle with PCOS. I used to be 110lbs eight years ago. I am now 167lbs, and have bruises and scars from acne on about a 3rd of my body. I can relate to what you're saying.
I have had people in my family say to me, oh it is just a little acne, and you are still cute. I know that PCOS does not make me feel cute, in the least. I was hasty in my previous statement, I apologize.
Sareybear,
I'm glad to hear that you have a supportive husband. It is nice having that special someone in your life who comforts you when you are feeling down in the dumps both emotionally and physically. My husband has been there for me through all of this. I couldn't be more thankful! Keep your chin up girlie. If you ever need to talk just shoot a message my way. The good thing about this site is that we can help lift each other up when it feels like the world is crashing down.
celie9,
Thank you for the comment. There are no hard feelings! I know how things work. PCOS is a very touching subject. It is hard to deal with but we all know to extent what each is going through. I've been trying to keep more positive by not letting this PCOS take the best of me. We all need to just take this PCOS and kick it in the BUTTT!!!!
I'm right there with you ladies. I've gained over 50 lbs in the past 3 years, acne and body/facial hair are out of control... I look at pictures of how i used to look and just cry. I don't know how my husband can stand to look at me... I can barely stand to look at myself these days.
I've just started seeing a therapist and taking antidepressants... i still am not happy with myself but at least now i don't feel like crying or running away every single day.
Anyway. I just wanted to say thank you for sharing, and for helping me see that i'm not the only one!
I feel the same way, was diganosed after having symptoms which were blown off as "getting old, and just being a woman", until I found more qualified physicians. I have always eaten carefully, as I am diabetic, now I am also insulin dependant due to the arrogance of a doctor. I used to be told I was attractive, but now I have horrible facial hair. It is thick, coarse, and comes back, every three days even with taking metformin, aldactane, simvistatin, and vaniqa.
My weight soared postpartum with my son, and the more I questioned it, the more the incompetent doc dismissed my concerns. As if I were some trival being not worth his time. Now I am stuck in this hypermuscular body, with muscular arms, legs, shoulders, and back, so unfeminine. Worst of all, a horrible protruding belly, and am battling thyroid issues.
Sometimes I get so depressed I want to commit self harm or worse. Then some patronizing asshole comes along and thinks I should just snap out of it. Or that it's not a serious as say, cancer. And I hate myselff for being so ****ing ugly and depressed. I hate people who glibly stuff their face and gain no weight. I watch what I eat and excerscie daily. I used to be happy, happy go lucky, always the life of the party.
People are so damn shallow, men never stopped to ask me what I thought of advancements in mathematics instruction, but they sure as hell thought I was worth
stopping for to discuss my physical attributes. As if I were somehow better, or more worthy, and how they would profess at what a wonderful person I was, when they knew absolutely nothing about me.
I am glad that there is a site where, I can vent my concerns about PCOS and not be made to feel that my concerns are trivial or just seen as being petty. I for a while thought that maybe, there was something wrong with me for being upset about going through these physical changes. I am happy to know that my feelings aren't trivial and there are other women going through the exact same thing.
I say this because, most of the women, I have spoken to about my symptoms, will go on to say "oh, well I just had a baby and now have cellulite", I try to explain to them, that I have a actual condition,that is a health problem, and not something that is just going to disapear with medication, or plastic surgery. They will start comparing the time that they had acne with my acne,or say, If you just eat right your PCOS will disapear. They don't seem to understand that PCOS is more than a physical thing it is also an endocrine disorder.
In my opinion there a lot of ignorance about PCOS and it's devastating affects on the women who have it. Most women no matter what, want to at some point in their life want to feel attractive, desired, PCOS for most part takes that away from women. I wish more celebrities would come out about having PCOS and work towards inspiring other women, but of course, they can afford the best doctors, surgeons, fertility experts. It just sucks that they don't come forward.
I am so there with you all! Girls, please remember you ARE beautiful! Don't let anyone tell you otherwise! I have suffered as you all have. Though I have Crohn's and PCOS, and I may now have PMDD, I know that there are resources and God is always there for each of us Just stay POSITVE! I am working on learning new ways to cope with the monthly extreme mood swings. Looks like Seratonin re-upake inhibitors may be the way to go.
feelings of disgust 
<-- me lol
