atra1781

Hello!

I am new to this board. While my husband and I are TTC we are also trying to get as much information as possible about all of our options. We are very interested in learning more about foster to adopt. I guess we have a huge fear of becoming very close to and loving children with the hope of adoptng them and then possibly losing them again to their birth parents and this is why we are a little hesitant about this option. However, I feel this is a less costly way of going about adopting and having children. I am just curious about any experiences you all may have had wth foster to adopt and what types of things you need to go through in order to be considered for such a program. We live in PA and have already gotten some information about Diakon. I also work in social services and have heard they have a good reputation. Any information you can give us would be greatly appreciated.

__________________
Adrienne (27)
dx PCOS April 2002


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married to DH (31) on May 13, 2007
TTC #1- as of 4/08
Metformin 1500mg
Soy isoflavones 150mg CD3-7
Prenatal vitamins

Hoping and praying for a tiny miracle!
Looking into adoption!

ProudPCOMom

You can always request to foster/adopt children that are 'low risk' - at least that's what they call it in Texas. It's the children that are 'likely' to become adoptable because of prior histories with the parents (or the parents abandoned them at the hospital, etc). You can also do 'straight adopt' through CPS, where the parental rights have already been severed.

In both of our foster/adopt cases we accepted them as 'emergency placements', which is the highest risk category. They had not been in care previously and were very likely going to be Re-Unified with birth-family. In both of our cases, the birth-Mom's voluntarily relinquished their parental rights so we'll be adopting them 'soon'.

Although we have always been concerned about the 'what-ifs' of them being RU'd, we haven't had any children come into our home only to leave. Of course, that would've been a tough day for the entire family (as you WILL get attached).


You will need to be licensed for foster/adopt in your state and let the workers know your intentions for adopting.

Susan

__________________
Susan

PCOS dx 1996
Hypothyroid dx 2001
HELLP dx 2000, told me 2003
MTHFR dx 2004

3 early angels (12/97, 09/98, 02/99)
BS-B-05/00 (9 wks early - pictured at 2 days)-HELLP (3rd gr)
BD-S-04/03 (16 wks early)-HELLP-with us for one hour
BS-M-01/05 (22 wks early)-PPROM, possible IC-born still
AD-K-05/05 - placed 05/07, adopted 09/08
AS-B-06/06 - placed 04/07, adopted 06/08
Armour Thyroid 120 mg
Procardia XL 60mg
Glucophage 1500mg
Baby aspirin

jordon23

I can honestly I wish I had take one sentence of advice from a close friend about foster/adopt. They told me to "turn and run from that system as quickly as you can." In our state it's a horrible mess. We have been lied to twice, and told we would be adopting the child we were caring for. Both times we have had the children ripped from our arms. It has destroyed us emotionally to the point of just quitting. We have just gave up on having children because we can't survive even one more heart break.

Sweetenedsapphire

Go for "Legally Free" children, would be best for you. It means the parental rights have already been terminated and there is no chance of them going back to the birth parents at that point.

DH and I are going through the state for adoption (not foster to adopt, just adoption) and it is completely free. The only thing we pay for is the finalization to the lawyer we choose and that is reimbursed at tax time.

We started the process Feb. 6 and it has gone surprising quick. It took a while to get all the classes, cpr training, and the application done - not to mention we were finishing some house remodeling projects, but it hasn't been too bad wait wise. We have our homestudy on the 18th!

Hope that helps!

momma2four

I know this was from few days ago but I wanted to chime in. We adopted two girls through the foster care system. We became foster parents in April 2004 after ttc with medicine. We didn't want to use any more medicine so we thought adoption. We knew we couldn't afford an international adoption or a private adoption. It can be tough. We had 7 foster children including the two we adopted. Both of our girls we got right from the hospital so we are the only parents they now. I now that is not a norm for the foster care system but it can happen!! We did have a few scares several times but that goes with the territory. You never know until the tpr happens. We had a sibling group of four that we were going to adopt and that fell through. It is very heart-wrenching when that happens but you get through it. That was 3 years ago and I still feel bad about it when I see pictures of them. I will say that not everyone can be a foster parent. You have to be the right people for it. We have taken a break for awhile seeing we also had two bio children after we adopted. We will do it again though. We loved it!

angeljam

Hello! About your wanting to know about adoption through foster care. My husband and I adopted our little girl through foster care this year. Make sure you tell your case worker that you only want to take in children that are post adoptable, or legally free for adoption, meaning the parents rights are already terminated. We had to pay nothing to adopt our daughter, which was a major blessing. Also, alot of the children come with a subsidy "money" after adoption, if they are special need or considered hard to place. If you are thinking of fostering only... it is very stressful, i'll be honest. It is hard to let go, if you get attatched by them staying with you too long. They file termination on the parents if they dont meet the goals they set to get them back, in 12 - 18 months where we live. Do research online.. you'll find all the legal onfo where you live. It took almost two years to adopt our daughter, because she was not legally free. There is alot of red tape involved. Thats the most stressful thing about it. You have too continue taking classes to maintain your hours to remain a foster parent. They also run a background check, finger print you, Do home inspections, and visits if you have foster children, but it costs nothing. It isn't too bad depending on if you like your case worker. Check out Adopt us Kids online and America's Heart Gallery. They feature children who are waiting for adoption in foster care. If you have any more questions.. Let me know.. I'll do my best to help!

Adopting 2 Great Kids

Hi I guess we just got lucky 'cuz this is our second time fostering (had a 6 y/o boy and it didn't work out)and we are gettering to adopt our little ones. We have had them 19 months and we are getting to sign "the intent to adopt" papers on july 25, 2008. We are so excited. We have a 5 y/o girl and a 22 m/o boy. We love them so much. Love reading everyone else's sotries...

Adopting 2 Great Kids

Wanted to add, we only signed up to foster but we wanted to adopt. Who your social worker is can make a big difference in your experience too.