Has anyone adopted an older child (10+)

**Bethann** · 01-18-2005 04:25 PM

For a variety of reasons, DH and I do not feel called to parent a baby, whether a biological or adopted child. But we are starting to consider adopting an older child probably out of the foster care system, and I was wondering what people's experiences have been, how the process is different from an infant adoption.

If we decide this, we're still a long way out, we're 25 and probably won't be in a position to adopt till our mid-30's, but I would love to hear whatever anyone has to share.

**rachelmichellek** · 01-20-2005 03:19 PM

Hi, just wanted to say that I am in the process of older-child adoption too, and feel many of the same things you do (not into the baby stage so much). I just recommend hitting the library to read up on stories of families that have adopted older children, as well as checking out the resources in our "sticky" message at the top of the forum, especially adoptuskids.org, which can help you link to your State's adoption "statewide headquarters".

I am curious why you are waiting 5 years to start the process, though? Why not sooner? when you're seeking a child from the foster system it's often very low cost or free, so you wouldn't ahve to save up so much money as with other types of adoptions...

**Bethann** · 01-20-2005 05:04 PM

Thanks for the suggestions. I'm still in school, by the time I finish, I'll probably (if things go well), be a couple year appointment before getting a permanent teaching position and settling down in one location. So it's not so much about being a certain age, or the money, but about being in a stable place in life, and ready to focus on a child.

**Cassandra Gayle** · 01-20-2005 08:05 PM

We are adopting a 7 year old girl. I think it has been better for my husband and myself.. But that is just my view on it. It has been a wonderful experience...Cassie

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