hate obsessing like this....

sunnier · 05-07-2005, 03:26 PM

why i am wasting my life thinking and getting upset over how my sister and brother basically dont have anytime for me and are too busy with their own familes and inlaws.

for example my brother called today to say my SIL is in labour with baby #2 and i was like who is watching #1 and he said MIL,BIL and SIL are over and i thought "of course" they are pretty much over there and than i get envious cause my hubby's family is overseas and my mom is dead and my dad i are not close either and than these thoughts upset me. same goes with my sister we have never gotten along and she is too busy with her own life too.

i know i should go out and make more new friends our own like they have done but its not easy i have a few close couple firends but we dont see them too often. and my brother basically said to me in the past " you have ur own family now focus on that " and he is right why should i give so much attention to what they are doing?

how do i stop feeling this way, life is already short to begin with and is going by fast, i want to enjoy it instead of thinking these negative thoughts all the time.

thanks for whoever responds to this post.

amber

astrophe · 05-07-2005, 03:53 PM

Take the bull by the horns, get out there and mingle! Make some new friends. You can do this!

I really think we get more of what we focus on. If you focus on being down, you find more thing to be down about.

However if you feel like it's more than just a random case of the blues and really are talking about depression... think about getitng help on the local level. Depression is anger turned inward and you may need objective eyes to help you see waht is causing the anger and how to get beyond it.

best wishes,
A.

sunnier · 05-07-2005, 05:21 PM

hi a thanks for answering,i already know the root of my anger and that is having the ideal family when that is not ever going to be the case where we see each other often and keep in touch, my family has always been dysfunctial from the start and as a child i tried to so hard or should i say "i wished so hard that we could be closer" and now as an adult i still am wishing the same things, when what i should be doing is focusing on my own family now, DH and DD they are my immediate family now, not my dad, sis or brother.

see i know the answer to my own problems, but I guess I use my OCD as an excuse as to why i obess about this.

anyways hope you understand what i mean, thanks again

p.s. i am on the quiet side and so is DH actually more so than me, so its not easy to make new friends but i know thats a not excuse either.