Hi there guys, first of all....great site, Im glad there is sooo much content here and alot of people willing to share their stories, they make my wifes and my own life much easier and happier.
I have a problem tho, I love my wife, more than anything else in the world, she has had PCOS since puberty. Her symptoms aren't too bad, she's maybe 15lbs overweight, and she does grow a little hair on her face, blonde peachfuzzy stuff that she goes and get's electrolysis for. Her hair on her head is getting thinner, but so far...its honestly not too bad. My problem is this: I love her, and I think she is very attractive, and I am very sexually attracted to her, but she has MAJOR amounts of pubic hair, so much that you can't even see her labia. It extends down to about 4 inches down her inner thighs. Now, honestly it doesn't bother me that much, but when I see it, I instantly lose my erection.
She thinks that this is because I don't find her attractive, and she gets extrememly angry with me. I try to explain that men do not have any control over this and that I love her and find her beautiful, but in order to make love she is going to have to at least get like, a bikini line wax or at least reduce the amount of hair in the pubic region. I've been super-good about this, but she feels that if I would want her to change one little thing about her that i don't love her anymore, what do I do? I can live without having sex, but I don't think she can.
Also, its really hard to get her motivated to do physical excersise, you know riding a bike or walking or doing some running. I know this would help out her weight and hair situation as it bothers her ALOT. But she just won't do it, no matter how hard I try. I follow her diet to the letter, even tho Im a skinny guy and don't need to, and support her in every way. Same with Womens Rogaine, she just won't try it.
Anyways, are there any tips you guys and gals can give me? I love this woman, she is my soulmate, but I just don't know what to do anymore.
hi... this is only my opinion... she seems to care about the peach fuzz right?? it would seem to me that she would get the bikini line fixed... have you asked her if she would wax or get laser there?? what literally was her answer???
i think you are being honest in your feelings and that is good... but when i read this i thought a couple things..
one is ..could she be too embarrassed to get her bikini line fixed..or does she not have enough money for laser hair removal??
do you pressure her to work out???
do you pressure her to eat a certain way???
i am not saying you do...but if you did... i think for many people..they may become resistant to doing workouts or waxing... in a defiant defensive way... but maybe thats just me...
i really hope some hubbies can help you out here..i would be interested to hear what they say as well... i wish you well xoxo jenn
__________________ jennifer, 33years old
long island, new york
dxd 2001
searching for new therapies/meds for pcos
met/gluc not working as well..but on 1000mgxr
married on 9/28/06 to keith
i'm not so sure if i am the right person to reply to this but nonethe less.. i know for sure that in warmer countries men and women both trim or shave their pubic hair for hygine purposes because all the perspiration gives them rashes so keeping their pubic hair trimmed helps keep the rashes away.
this can be done in the privacy of your own bathroom using a scissor or razor . Just make sure to use a disposable razor or sterelize the scissor before using (sorry about going into so much detail)
so if you aproach it from a more hygiene point of view rather than a sexual point of view..things might work!
__________________ Me(33) DH(39) DS(3)
2000mg metformin
prenatals
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I would suggest you trim or shave it for her.For one she does'nt have to deal with the embarasing scene at a salon . Maybe start by offering to shave ehr legs and go from there.
My DH shaves my legs a lot and hes much better than I am about it , I guess cause hes more careful than I am.. Its worth a try anyhow.
I would suggest pretty much what everyone else has said...maybe offer to shave her legs for her, then while you're at it you can offer to trim her pubic hair as well. You don't have to shave it all completely off, if one or both of you is uncomfortable with that, but you could just trim it up. This can be a very erotic and sensual experience for both of you. I know that my DW loves it when I shave her legs for her...even with an electric razor, it's just very relaxing for her, so she really enjoys it; plus it's kind of like they're being pampered if you do it for them, so that's a plus as well. You could at least suggest it to her & see if she's receptive to the idea.
I know it's hard for women with PCOS (especially the ones who have the outward symptoms...excessive hair growth, weight issues, cystic acne, etc.) to feel like they are sexy or attractive sometimes...it affects their self esteem and causes them to think that no one could find them attractive or sexy...I know that all women with PCOS don't feel this way, but some do, so this might be part of the reason she gets so upset with you, as well. Just reassure her that you do love her, you are attracted to her & you want to help her to feel better about herself.
Hope some of this helps...let us know how it turns out & don't hesitate to ask if there's anything else that we can do for you.
__________________ TxLady's DH & Hannah's Daddy
"That which does not kill us, only makes us stronger."
-Nietzsche
"It's not what lies behind us or before us that matters, but what lies within us."
-Mark Twain
I don’t understand why there is so much aversion to hair these days as it really is a natural thing even in women and especially pubic hair. My ex girl friend suffered form PCOS’s since her puberty but my problem was totally opposite to yours! She just kept trimming and shaving when I really liked it all natural… For me it was a turn off to see her after the bikini waxes! Just shows you we are all different I suppose…
Maybe you can offer to shave her pubic hair for her? Turn it into a sexy foreplay type thing. Maybe you can start out in the shower or bath and completely pamper her head to toe with scented lotions and stuff like that.....and work your way into the bedroom. That may make her more willing to try it . One thing tho.....I would just start out with a trim, see if she likes that before shaving the WHOLE thing....it can be shocking to see for the first time, esp. if you aren't expecting it. Plus regrowth can ITCH!!
I think I understand her motivation problem. I face it myself, as I am sure many women with PCOS do. It is so hard to deal with these things on a day to day basis, only to have diets fail when you follow them to a T and to have to do hair removal EVERY day, or horrible acne problems that just don't seem to go away no matter what medicine you try. It really sucks your self-esteem dry. It is so hard to be a woman in this world today and have one thing wrong to keep you from being perfect (in society's eyes), let alone to have an abundance of imperfections. Makes it hard to face the world some days.
You sound like a loving and supporting husband. The fact that you are here and posting shows that. All you can do is your best to keep supporting her. Maybe she's open to seeing a counselor to help her deal with her feelings?
__________________
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DS Owen 7/28/04
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Well, I understand her self esteem issues. I have the same problems that she has. Its nice to hear how supportive you seem to be towards her. I agree that you could try shaving or trimming the area for her. It could be a very erotic experience for both of you. My ex preffered me totally shaved, but I didn't like looking like a 12 yr old girl, so I compromised by keeping it closely trimmed. I used one of these... http://www.folica.com/FinishingTouch__d384.html and with the eyebrow attachment, it shaved the hair down close but still left enough without being scratchy and itchy. Then without the eyebrow attachment, I could shape it and "clean up" other areas to totally remove the hair. Needless to say I didn't use this on my face afterward.... haha
As far as her exercising... Maybe you two could go for walks together or get a gym membership together? Its very difficult for me to get motivated. Just try to join in and help her out... sounds like you're doing that with her diet and everything... maybe you could help her out in that way.
Hope I helped... Best wishes.
__________________ Amber (30) & DH Joshua (28) My Dx:Hypothyroid age 16 Syndrome X including Hypothyroidism, PCOS, High Cholesterol, & Insulin Resistance age 21 Vitamin D Deficiency age 30 My Rx:Synthroid, Lipitor, Yasmin, Vitamin D Supplement, Align
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Do you shave your legs and pubic hair for her? If so, then I suggest you recommend whatever method of hair removal you use to your wife.
If you don't remove this hair for her then don't ask her to.
Women are supposed to have body hair. It is natural. If she doesn't have a problem with it, but you do, then it's your problem, not hers.
Have you considered counseling to determine why something as innocuos as pubic hair reviles you to the point of losing your erection? I mean really, it's not like she is covered in maggots...it's just hair.
I imagine your wife probably isn't turned off by your pubic hair.....
Help! 
. One thing tho.....I would just start out with a trim, see if she likes that before shaving the WHOLE thing....it can be shocking to see for the first time, esp. if you aren't expecting it. Plus regrowth can ITCH!!
