Hmmm.... - Page 2

thejakester · 06-03-2008, 02:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LilBitMagoo

so the women should respect the mens area. I see no problem with the women asking the men questions since its nice to get their point of view.

This is why women confuse us men.

I guess from a mans perspective a mans corner means 'Keep out!' but women are still allowed to ask questions thru the window?

Arguments on forums are as old as forums are. If it were not for women here I would not be able to learn of the things my gf would not dare tell me. Im grateful for the honesty I read in the other areas.

Having a Keep Out category would be good if men think their discussion should be between dudes. You have to realize that men do not always give other men good advice. Its the blind leading the blind with this disease since all men came here to learn from the women.

jimsbaby · 06-03-2008, 03:06 AM

AmyElnora just because it is posted in a mens forum doesnt mean women can not respond and yes sometimes men just want it to be men but what if a woman can answer better than a man can? So take that into consideration to. Im not by any means trying to start an arguement just trying to put that fact out there.

AmyElnora · 06-03-2008, 02:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jimsbaby

yes sometimes men just want it to be men but what if a woman can answer better than a man can?

The men will become angry because the women didn't respect them enough to stay away when asked. This is the number one reason why men are leaving.

The Man of the Board · 06-03-2008, 02:51 PM

Well amy has it right there is a bound within posts. But i know there is a time and place for everything. When we see it a post for a man pov, and all we see is well I am not a man but this is what I would do it tends to drive us from the post and the boards. I have been know when i first got here I was rude and mean, this was not what I meant to be seen as, but when learning all aspects of not just dealing with my own problems I needed to relise, that i needed not only to help men but when I can and should help everyone as well. But I do think there needs to be a sepration on the boards men talk to men, women asking men and so on and even men asking women stuff cause we all know there are things we cant ask our wifes and GF ok rant off

jimsbaby · 06-04-2008, 09:48 AM

Its not that fact hat men think women disrespect them when they answer a question its the fact that many of the ladies want to help and give there advice on some of the subjects that the men write about. So as for the men getting mad they just need to keep that in mind. I myself have never done this but would if I thought it could help.

AmyElnora · 06-04-2008, 10:42 AM

I can't MAKE any of the women here stop posting when they shouldn't. If you want to post, go ahead, just know that you are helping drive the men away.

This was taken from the thread I gave you a link to a few posts back, but you must not have read it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by nikbeehubby

the point of view questions had nothing to do with it. i actually encourage those to the Nth degree. anything to help us guys and our women understand each other better is great. the problem with those threads is that a man's perspective is sought and the first post following the question is "im not a guy BUT.... heres my two cents anyway"

YOUR two cents wasnt asked for. (generally speaking of course) it gets annoying that post after post i have to read thru before i get a chance to answer some man or woman with a question. the entire site, minus this one teeny little section, is allocated to you girls to answer, rant, rave, scream, cry, whatever you so choose. im not the first guy to complain about this,, altho i admit im probably the first to be this vocal about it.

if the thread asks for a guys opinion, why not let the guys give it.??? if someone wants a girls opinion then go to anywhere in the rest of the site.
i, cant speak for others, get fed up to the point of not wanting to come in here at all.

im not saying close the male section to women- i am suggesting hubby corner be moderated. the "im not a guy BUT...." posts get deleted before they ever show up in the threads.

if husbands and boyfriend's participation in this site is encouraged then why in the world would something the very people you wish to attract find annoying be tolerated.? we are men, dont give a damn reading about the first time two people ate ice cream together holding hands in the park. talk about guy stuff, NASCAR, barbeque, boobies, football, whatever it takes just to get conversatoins going. if the men come in here AT ALL then so much the better. we have short attention spans... we may post some chit chat for a bit and then move on around the site reading up on whats around. ya think your men may learn something then?

"dont read it if it annoys you" this i found funny. how about " dont post with crap in a section its been repeatedly asked you not"

i hope it changes for the better.
Kat, youve got an awesome site here. ive said that before and im sure its been such a huge help to countless women and the men that love them. Personally speaking from the wife and myself... thank you. your hard work helped us.

that being said,,, im done. im not saying i wont ever come back and participate here but for the most part color me goodbye. ive too much to do with too little time to waste it beating my head up against a wall. If anyone ever asks why the husbands dont participate here more often... point them to this thread.

And I am in no way trying to pick a fight with you either, or with any woman for that matter. The fact is, the men are speaking up and basically telling us what they don't like, and whats wrong with the site that makes them not want to be here, and everybody is just lets it blow in one ear and out the other. I mean, think of it this way, there are only a handful of men who are active on this board anymore, and instead of trying to keep them happy and interested in this site, we're doing just the opposite.

Imagine you were a man poking around this website wondering if it would be worth it to join. You notice that there is a men's section so you click it to see how many men are here, and if you would like to talk with them, only to find that 90% of the posts are WOMEN. Do you think thats going to make that guy who's looking around want to join, or run in the other direction?

cemomster · 06-05-2008, 09:21 AM

I have been lurking around here for a bit. I have come to the conclusion that no one really knows what they want. First you have a woman saying what the men want. Then you have some men saying they would not mind having a woman's point of view.
I guess if I want to get what a man is thinking on this topic, I won't come here. My dh has to mull over his feelings for DAYS or MONTHS before he can talk about them, and seeing what the guys say has helped out. But if we are not welcomed, then ALL women (including AmyElnora) should stay out, and it should be locked, with a passcode to only the men.

Quote:

if the thread asks for a guys opinion, why not let the guys give it.??? if someone wants a girls opinion then go to anywhere in the rest of the site.
i, cant speak for others, get fed up to the point of not wanting to come in here at all.

Do you guys really give it. I have read questions about symptoms and really a guy knows our symptoms or what we are going through?

So guys heres one lady you won't have to worry about anymore. My advice, ALL WOMEN stay out.

tina_d · 06-05-2008, 09:35 AM

I have to agree. Unless the man is specifically asking for a woman's point of view, leave him alone!

I've noticed that throughout the whole forum, that there are several ladies on here who have a one-tracked mind, like thinking that all members are ttc or that PCOS only affects them and that men who are SO to PCOSers have no right to express their frustration or negative feelings.

I applaud the guys who are regularly on here for putting up with the BS that they are getting here and trying to survive a relationship with a PCOSer.

Personally, I find it very helpful to come in here and just read what the men are saying. Sometimes it opens my eyes to what I'm doing to my dh.

Ladies, we don't live in a perfect world. There's no 'happy' pill that's going to be a miracle cure all. And these guys could very easily walk out the door to this forum and their home.

And if that doesn't change your mind about flaming the men on the board, go back to http://www.soulcysters.net/
and scroll down til you find:

Quote:

Husbands & Boyfriends
Men have feelings, too!!! Talk with other men about helping your SoulCyster...

AmyElnora · 06-05-2008, 01:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cemomster

First you have a woman saying what the men want.

I have only repeated things that the men have said themselves.

Quote:

Originally Posted by cemomster

Then you have some men saying they would not mind having a woman's point of view.

You are absolutely right. Some men welcome the womens point of view, while others frown upon it. I think thats why having three separate areas to this section would be perfect.

-men talking to other men (no women allowed)
-men talking to women (men asking women questions)
-women talking to men (women asking men questions)

Sweetface · 06-05-2008, 06:15 PM

No matter how many sub topics, no matter if its locked or not, people need to be polite and respectful. If the men or women can't do that, then create a subtopic RANT.

I have not been here long enough to see what the men complain about but I have seen some seriously disrespectful statements from men towards the women. My mature take on it is that even though this is a mans corner there is still no room for name calling and insults. If that is allowed here my Kat and moderators it's just enabling some serious abuse just to keep the men around. The reality is, if you are abusive, name calling, insulting, man or woman you don't deserve a password to this site. I have been on other forums where that is never tolerated so I'm surprised that enabling is happening here.

It IS very true men have Short attention spans and I do too. I admit if a woman leaves 10 paragraphs of ttc or af info I won't read it. I do want to know what men have to think, but if it's delivered abusively, I could care less what they have to say. Abuse invalidates what they say so its a waste.

And just because a man threatens to leave if he can't be abusive does not mean our moderators should go running after him because he's the last man on the soulcysters planet. I'm not an enabler and insults name calling and abuse should not be tolerated just because we want men here.

jimsbaby · 06-05-2008, 06:48 PM

There are many good points on here. My husband is always looking up new info on pcos and hes not one to share his feelings either. It takes him time to get them out. But I still dont think that we should have seperate forums like amyelnora mentioned. But both men and women need to be mature about things and see it from both perspectives. And I do agree with sweetface that if they (men or women) cant be mature about it then they dont need to be on here. Amyelnora think of it as this if men are geting mad because women are posting in that forum then its like saying that the men cant post in most of the other forum because they dont have pcos. This site is for everyone male, female, young, old, etc.. Thats the way I feel about it. I think we may just have to agree to disagree. And still by any means I am not trying to fight so please dont take it that way.

thejakester · 06-06-2008, 11:57 AM

Look, I have no problem being polite even if a woman writes something that does not belong here. If men are leaving over that they are taking this way to seriously. I dont plan on leaving the board over that. Can men ask women things in the other sections?

jimsbaby · 06-07-2008, 08:50 AM

Yes by all means they can ask questions in other sections.

tina_d · 06-07-2008, 09:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by thejakester

Can men ask women things in the other sections?

Yup, men can and I've seen a few questions posted in the sub-topics asking about conditions and medications. I think it's great when I see a post from a concerned SO who is trying to understand. If you have any questions about PCOS, I think you would actually get a better answer posting in the sub-topic then you would get asking on the men's board.