Honestly, how bad is labor and delivery pain wise??? - Page 2

tshaffpa33 · 05-19-2008, 02:12 PM

I'll be probably the only one posting that the Epi was painful. Sorry :- X haha. So fair warning if you don't want to read it...

I too have really bad panic attacks. I had no anxiety or panic whatsoever when I was in labor with my son. I guess your mind is just elsewhere. Now that's while I was in *labor*.......

I started at 1 am with losing my plug and instantly had contractions 5 min apart until 9 am the next morning. I was at the hospital by that point, and was not progressing. The contractions to that point weren't that bad. They felt like "ohmygod I'm going to crap myself" pain. They had to put me on pitocin though and upped it every half hour. The contractions go to 2 min apart but I never dialated. they were painful, but it wasn't anything I couldn't deal with. You figure out okay one's coming, you just sort of try to relax while it peaks, and then it's gone. But I was pretty sure I wanted an epi (thinking I could still have the child vaginally). the pain was bad enough that I didn't want even more while pushing the kid out.

The way I figure it, if you can get it.. go for it.

That being said. At 3 pm I was rushed in to get a c-section because I was not progressing and Eli decided to pass his first poop. They were afraid he was getting stressed out so I said do what you have to to get him out before we have a real emergency.

The epi hurt ... something awful. Sort of like when the dentist hits a nerve ;P They told me I wasn't supposed to feel it but I did. they could only get half of it in, the poor anesthesiologist was like "i can't do it I can't get the other part in!" I literally jumped off the table and freaked. Luckly a very large nurse was holding me.

I was still numb though but after having that happen I went into massive panic. my entire body went numb, including my lips, and I felt like something was sitting on my chest. I lived though? ya know? If you experience panic attacks, you know it wont kill you. by 3:45 I was in my room holding my son... and NONE of what happened.. mattered at all!

tinkchen · 05-20-2008, 11:12 AM

Disclaimer: All comments following are my own opinion... and my own experience. I don't believe my birth choices are any better than anyone elses- but they were and are right for me.

I had a drug free delivery with DS and plan on it with this one. I honestly believe that the majority of the pain is due to fear causing you to fight what your body is doing. When I had gall bladder attacks, and when my SI/low back was all messed up the pain for me was far worse than the labor pains. It was almost 30 hours from the time my water broke until I had my son. I pushed for 2.5 hours- his head circumference was in the high 90's percentile wise. I practiced relaxing myself the whole time. Any time I felt a contraction coming I forced myself to focus on relaxing my body. That really made a difference for me. The only time I really had a hard time was during transition- but it still wasn't scream in pain sort of pain. Even with the long labor and pushing I never felt as if it was the worst pain I had ever felt- in fact I was tired, but ready to go at the same time. I had such a wonderful birth experience that I would do it again in a heartbeat- and if everything goes to plan- will do again in November/December. I also had such a good experience that I tell all my pregnant friends that they should read up on med free birth and should consider it as another option.

You can lessen the chance of tearing by pushing when your body tells you- not necessarily when the doctor does. I told my DH when I was pregnant that if the doc or nurse started doing the unnatural "push for 10 seconds...push, push , push, push" thing on me he better shut them up. It is more natural for you to push for a few seconds at a time, maybe for more than once per contraction. If you are forcing to hard to fast your body does not get to open up as much as it can. Fortunately my doc is very "granola" (she's had 3 home water births herself) so I didn't have to worry about that. She has since told me several times that Quentin's birth was one of the coolest that she has ever been to because it was so relaxed.

I won't have an EPI (they don't even offer them around here- spinal block at the most) partly because I watched my friend get one and damn- no one is coming near my back with a needle like that. Also, as someone mentioned- I try to keep all drugs away from my body the whole pregnancy for the sake of the baby so I didn't/don't want to flood them with drugs just before their first experience of life outside the womb. I think EPIs have their place and that a lot of women do really well with them- honestly I am too much of a wuss to have one!

Even if you chose to have a medicated birth you should think about using some of the techniques that Ina May Gaskin recommends in her books, or The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth. Both have some really cool suggestions that you can pick and choose from.

Knowledge is Power. The more you know the less afraid you will be.

HippieMama76 · 05-20-2008, 12:02 PM

I totally agree with Tinkchen! My labor was short and fast, but the pain was definitely manageable, so much so that there is no question that if everything goes to plan, I will be having another unmedicated birth in August.

Honestly, I'm much more afraid of a big needle in my back than I am of birthing!!

I can't stand watching shows like "A Baby Story" on TLC where the mom is screaming and cursing and rolling around in agony. Same with all the TV shows where the wife is threatening her husband, like "You did this to me!" and "You're never touching me again!" I think they set up this expectation that labor is supposed to be this terrible, painful thing. Maybe it's good for ratings or a laugh, but it's not at all how labor is supposed to be.

Holdensmom · 05-20-2008, 12:26 PM

I'm not gonna lie to you, it's not the most comfortable thing in the world, but it's not the most painful either. My epidural wouldn't work, so I had no choice, but to do things naturally. When I went in to be insuced I was already dialted to 4cm. They started the pitocin about noon. I barely felt those contractions. My doc came in about 1pm and broke my water. That didn't hurt at all, but then the contractions were much stronger. The only time I screamed or rolled around the bed was during transition, but luckily that doesn't last long. I pushed him out in 3 pushes and tore enough for 7 stitches. He was born at 5:25pm, 8 lbs 13 oz. So my labor wasn't very long.

I think the key is keeping calm and keeping the fear at bay. Keep telling yourself the pain is temporary and perfectly natural. Do not let your self panic. Focus on one contraction at a time, and there's no shame asking for drugs to help you manage your pain.

If child birth was that terrible everyone would only have one child
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tinkchen · 05-20-2008, 05:26 PM

Ditto Holdensmom. If it were that bad the huge percentage of us that are answering you right now that are PG again- probably wouldn't be!

kary05 · 05-20-2008, 08:17 PM

I had to laugh when I read tinkchen's last post. I remember my labor experience VERY clearly. I remember the pain from my episiotomy and the pain from the endometritis I developed post partum. I'm pregnant again cuz it was all worth it! Yes, my labor was not fun (and I'll never forget the pain I felt) but I now have a gorgeous 18 month old son so I'd happily go through it all again. Just goes to show it's all about perspective.

PBLayzod · 05-20-2008, 08:23 PM

I was induced. I had my epidural after the contractions had started. They felt like bad AF cramps for me. The epidural was a breeze. It was nothing like them make it out to be on the TLC shows. I didn't hurt after that. I ended up with a c-section, so I was in pain for a few days because of that. I also had swelling in my nether regions from the 1 1/2 hours of pushing prior to the c-section. I have a high pain tolerance, though.

shllss · 05-20-2008, 08:54 PM

The best advice I can give is to just go into the entire birthing process with an open mind. Everyone goes in the first time with almost a fantasy of exactly how they want the process to go and more time than not, things don't happen that way. If you go in with a plan of not having an epi and decide to get one it doesn't mean you wimped out or failed at having a natural birth. It's one of those things that you can really plan for (pain sensation) until you are having the contractions. For me, it was like "so this is what it feels like.......EPIDURAL" and I went in totally planning on a natural birth. I ended up with a c-section, but I would have taken the epidural either way and I was fine, dd was fine and it was overall the most wonderful experience of my life.

Good luck - you'll do great!

Sandra8256 · 05-20-2008, 09:30 PM

Thank you for all the wonderful stories, ladies. It was great reading as I watch my due date pass by today!

PBLayzod · 05-20-2008, 10:36 PM

Sandra ~ I was at work all day on my due date, so I can relate.
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In the end, all that matters is that that baby arrives and comes home.

Purple_monkfish · 05-21-2008, 01:54 PM

It's different for everyone, for me.. the pain I was in before I even got to "established labour" was mindblowing... I honestly had never anticipated that much pain, I nievely believed it'd be like period cramps only more severe.. ahahaha what a fool I was.

Anyway, I had an epidural and induction when I failed to progress. the epidural was mostly because I was becoming violent toward the poor midwife hahaha. It was bliss, aside from the itching.. noone ever mentions the itching. No headache, just nice numbness. Heck, I could feel enough to tell the midwife several hours later that there was pressure down there and I thought the baby might be comming. I was right of course and he was born 20 minutes later.

I had wanted to try so many different methods of pain relief, I really did... but in the end I knew the only way I was gonna get through it was with drugs.. and lots of them! hahah. I felt a lot more in control after pain relief, I honestly can't understand why you'd want to go without lol. Still, some women don't experience as much pain, we're all different and all have different thresholds after all.

Jenlynn83 · 05-22-2008, 01:08 PM

I have had 2 epi's and a natural. By FAR natural is what I enjoyed most.
With DD#1 I was young and scared opted for the epi, the epi was a BREEZE! Easy!
WIth DD#2 I went natural, well I was induced but didn't do pain meds.
With DD#3 They talked me into an epi because I didn't have a sitter for my older two kids (because Ky came before the induction) so EVERYONE was telling me I would scar my kids for life and blah blah. So I went ahead and got the epi HUGE mistake for me, not only had I already labored 18 hours with out it, but it hurt like a SOB! I was one of the lucky ones HAHAH that got the "shock" on both sides of my body, I literally screamed! LOL Where as I hadn't even flinched with a contrax! I did end up with a epi head ache, and I'll tell you... WHOA! Those hurt bad.

Labor only gets so bad. At some point the pain won't get any worse. I know when I went natural I kept telling myself, "It can only last so long.. Eventually the baby will be here." Sure enough she was
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Don't worry, women have been birthing babies in fields for YEARS! Women were designed to have babies! You'll be in a safe, clean, warm/cool environment with every pain med imaginable if you need it. Enjoy it! It is seriously, life's most PRECIOUS MIRACLES!

Legal Eagle · 05-22-2008, 01:23 PM

Thanks all! I am considering not getting an epi (but am open to the option once the time comes). I don't have any sort of "natural birth" dreams, I am afraid of pain medicine since I am sensitive to it and I hate needles, ha.

PBLayzod · 05-22-2008, 01:53 PM

If you do end up want the epi, you won't even see the needle before or after it's done. Make everyone else leave the room so they don't scare you will their commentary.
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