How The Day Went (Sadness)

Betwixt · 11-11-2007, 01:03 PM

The fish stopped swimming today.
Gone are the dancing silvers and twisting yellows.
The red finned sharks won't pale any longer.
The tank stands empty;
I feel that ... void.

My hands broke out in hives,
Itching and twitching.
Scratching like a fiend on fire,
I couldn't stop.
Welts from poison or vexation I don't know.
Sometimes a sadness takes me over,
I can't help but feel .... tired.

Later I played with paper,
Affixing glue and cutting shapes to place on cards.
No words decorate creation.
What do I have to say to anyone?
Is anybody listening, anyway?

The love of my life said to me,
"You don't like yourself."
I liked the fishes, my hands, the paper.
Rarely myself.
I see flaws and failures,
So seldom do I see goodness and ... ambition.
Might it be hope I lack,
Have I been waiting too long,
For someone else to bring it to me?

nasheajones · 11-25-2007, 09:22 PM

I really like this one..sorry about your fish

I think if you can take a day like that and make it poetically profound.. you need to write more

very thought provoking... I think we are all waiting for someone to tell us of our greatness

Betwixt · 11-25-2007, 11:13 PM

That was the day we sold all our fish. We had this gorgeous 135 gallon tank, and we had freshwater sharks and loaches. I was soooo sad when we sold them all so we could move.

Thank you!! Because you've said I should, I've been brewing up a few ideas! Otherwise I've all but canned my writing. The other day I was unpacking boxes of books, and found the book of The International Book of Poetry that I was published in. I dunno, it was cool at the time, but I got snobby about the other stuff that was in there after I read it.

The New Yorker it is not.

jmldavidson · 12-02-2007, 05:34 PM

you definitely have a talent