How do you all do it?

Smitygirl · 11-08-2003, 04:28 PM

This question is to all the great guys in here. How do you do it? How do you manage to hang in and support us? I know my guy is having the hardest time coming to terms with my emotions, my mood swings and everything else. I can't even begin to say how much it helps, and how much it means to me that he holds on and supports me even when he's confused and hurt too. I want to show him that there's light at the end of the tunnel, since this is the worst emotional episode he's seen. What keeps you all going? Yes, I know...love is the answer, but seriously. What tangeble thing makes it worthwhile? Would it help if we gave flowers, made cookies... I just can't imagine anyone going through this voluntarily. What helps you all hold on?

TxHubby · 11-10-2003, 11:21 AM

Well, I can tell you that for me, it is love that makes it possible. I know that because of PCOS there are symptoms & side effects, etc. but when you truly love someone, then you love them for the who they are, entirely. That means taking the good with the bad. We all have good & bad things about ourselves & our personalities, but when you love someone, then you focus on the good things, and not so much on the bad ones.

Basically, it's like this...all the good times & good moments that I share with my DW far outweigh any bad times that we may have. For every mood swing or negative thing that may be caused by PCOS, there's two or three other really good things that more than offset that. Honestly, it's not always easy living with someone who has PCOS...just as I know it must not always be easy being the one who has to live with having PCOS, but the bad things are pushed aside by all the wonderful things about her, that made me fall in love with her in the first place, and make me fall in love with her all over again, every day.

I hope that doesn't sound too corny, but that's just the way I feel about it. I'm sure there are other guys out there with other reasons or opinions on this subject, but for what it's worth, that's mine. I really don't look at it like "why am I staying" or "why am I putting up with her", but instead I ask "why would I ever want to live without her ? " It's all in how you look at it, I guess. I hope this helps you a little bit. I'm sure you'll get some more feedback from some other guys, so that should help as well. Good Luck !!

SoulDoctor · 11-10-2003, 04:34 PM

^^^Wow...excellent words, I must say. I'll try to express what I was going to but that really does speak quite loudly. Personally, I know that it is not an easy route. Nothing worthwhile in life is easy to obtain or to cherish...there requires some work and sacrifice. PCOS is just one aspect of my fiance and while it can affect how she feels and indirectly how I feel...I love her nevertheless. We can dwell on some of the bad moments and walk around our days depressed or we can learn to work through the negative and cherish the positive...like researching articles on how to help treat one side effect of PCOS, spending the night just watching comedy shows and play wrestling during the commericals, playing board games and talking about our future life together, etc. When I look at her, I cannot help but let a big smile come across my face and my heart and say, "Thank you, God for this awesome blessing. She is so beautiful in all that she is." Those are my thoughts...