How do you know.....

bluedragonfly2000 · 04-26-2004, 11:07 PM

I was wondering how you knew you were bi or lesbian? I am struggling with my sexuality right now and could use some insight. Things have been very hard and emotional lately. I have been wondering for a long time but only now can look at the topic. I have a history of sexual abuse which makes the issue more complicated.
Thanks for reading this,
Mel

justred · 04-27-2004, 08:16 PM

I can relate, I also have been through sexual abuse in the past. I tend to follow my heart. I have always, up until I got married had a stronger emotional attachment towards women, still do in some ways, but my hubby is in touch with his feminine side a little more than the macho guys lol.

I figured out I had a curiosity that wouldn't go away and it was towards my best friend.

I grew up in a gay household and my Mom always said it was okay to like both men and women, that it didn't make me weird or anything. Infact she believed that it was the healthiest for me. To go with what my heart told me.

My best friend and I were together for about two and a half years and then we both found our hubby's, she ended up marrying an old boyfriend of mine. (long story hehe) but still today we are just as close as we were, though we live in different states....which might be a good thing cause I'd be really tempted to be lovey with her.

Sorry rambling...I would say just do what feels right and only you can decide what that is. I had alot to work through with my hubby about being abused and little things I didn't want him to do, like ways of touching me, but I haven't felt close to any other guy in my life as I do with him. Communication is key.

bluedragonfly2000 · 04-27-2004, 08:21 PM

Just wanted to thank you for your reply. I need to give myself time to figure me out

. I am married and so that is confusing because I have been denying that I may be bisexual all my life and not sure how to really figure it out.
Thanks again,
Mel

bazsmommy · 04-28-2004, 04:49 PM

I don't know I just kind of knew. I looked at the female body and had desire to explore it more. Not so much with the male body. Women kiss softly and touch is more serene. I just like what they have to offer. Sex doesn't have to be about procreating it can be about spending time in the here and now and having a gay old time, No pun intended, (SNICKERS). if you want to talk feel free to email me. bazsmommy@yahoo.com

Suthrngirl · 04-30-2004, 01:16 AM

I just want to say that I read these posts often. I have always found useful information here, but none like I have read tonight. I have met other women with PCOS and can relate to their symptons and ailments easily. I am married with a 2 year old child (yeah Clomid). I have recently fell deeply in love with a woman (my first) and has been battling with my own shadow about what to do. I love my DH but I am soooo comfortable with her. I can actually see her in my future. I partially disclosed to my DH (only the attraction). With weekly sessions with a therapist and daily doses of reality, I am coping. Thank you all for being one of me.

bluedragonfly2000 · 04-30-2004, 02:26 PM

Thanks for you replies. It is a big decision and I am just trying to take my time and see what feels right for me.
Thanks again,
Mel