I am no one

sweetkimmy · 03-12-2004, 10:07 AM

Has anyone seen the 1st episode of the third season of Buffy the Vampire Slayer? It's the one after she has killed Angel and she runs away and becomes a waitress. Anyway, at one point she is walking along the street and bumps into a man. He looks at her and says "I am no one". Whenever I watch that, I get goose bumps, because I feel like that sometimes. I wonder why I was born because I am so miserable and unhappy. What is my purpose. I get so afraid sometimes that I am going to end up completely alone, or I am going crazy. I've been to a psychiatrist before, but I wasn't comfortable with him. I have a hard time talking about myself on cue. It's not so bad right now because I am a CPA and am working so much, I don't have much time to think about anything else, but during the summer it is horrible. I have made up my mind to find another doctor this summer, but I'm afraid I will clam up with this new one like I did before. There are sometimes I do want to talk and I don't really have any friends, so I just keep it inside. Anytime I do try to say something, I am treated like I'm an idiot, or how dare I say something like that, or I have not right to feel that way, so I just don't bother.

Okay, that's enough. I just had to get that off my chest. Thanks for reading.

midniteexpress · 03-12-2004, 10:29 AM

I'm sorry you are feeling that way. We are here to listen. I don't have advice for you just wanted you to know that someone heard you and cares. I think finding a new dr sounds like a good idea. Sometimes we have to search thru some frogs to find our prince. You can talk here anytime so go for it.

Jenny Gabrenas · 03-12-2004, 10:39 AM

hi kim. just wanted you to hear that i care. and, sure, i feel the same a lot of the time.

take care of you!

jenny

denise26 · 03-14-2004, 10:46 PM

It's weird you mention that episode -- I just watched it this afternoon and thought the same thing -- I wonder why on earth I am here, and I think if I were to disappear no one would notice. Funny how we can identify so much with a TV show.

Lendi · 03-15-2004, 01:47 AM

One thing I want to remind you of is that we all touch someone's life in a way that would change it if we hadn't. All are important in the universe and usually we don't know why. I hope you find a counselor that you feel comfortable with. If not, find another and another until you do. You have that right, don't settle for less. If I can ever help, or just listen just let me know. I have no professional knowledge, by my "ears" work very well

Hugs to you, Lendi