I could use some support here...

sinnie · 08-19-2008, 09:30 PM

Maybe it's PMS but I'm feeling especially sad today. I feel fat, ugly and hopeless.

I had a reaction to the extended release metformin when Target pharmacy gave me the wrong pills. Whatever that makes it "extended release" caused me to have a seizure at work and I spent a night in the hospital from it and busted my face all up. Now I have a nice scar on my upper lip to remind me.

So since then (Target did pay all of my medical fees and lost wages) however I felt betrayed by then and took my prescription to Kroger. They have metformin made by a different company, small round pills. Whatever is in them, my body isn't agreeing with. I'm constantly sick and dizzy when I take them. Some days I forget and only take 1000mg in the morning and am so sick in the evening I don't take the rest.
I used to have this reaction back when I initially started taking metformin, but it was fixed when I began eating correctly. I started losing weight from 1-4lbs a week.

I got down to my lowest weight at the beginning of June, 236. Then I went to KY for the weekend. I had a hamburger, a few beers and yeah, my first soda in months. I came home, stepped on the scale and it said I gained 8lbs. Looking back I know I was a complete idiot. I know it was water weight, but I just said "screw it" and bought some ice cream and fell off the diet band wagon again. I was extremely upset because I had worked hard to bust my plateau of 240 that I had been at since March, all to have it destroyed and then some from ONE stupid night of letting go.

So fast forward to now, I'm back up to 255, however this morning the scale said 260.

I feel cramps in my ovaries and sex is hurting. So I guess AF is about to come. My husband is pissing me off because he wants sex but it's really painful right now and doesn't understand. I feel like an idiot and an asshole for telling him no.

I'm so depressed and miserable right now I don't even know if I want to keep trying. I used to have an issue with myself as a teenager where I would cut myself. Sometimes I feel so sick from the metformin I wonder if cutting myself a little bit would take my mind off the nausea.

Aside from that, and more rationally I was leaving my dentist yesterday and saw an acupuncterist across the street. I wonder if that would help with depression and sickness? I wonder if it would help with cravings? I hear reports that it does, but it all seems silly at the same time.
I guess I'm about ready to try anything.

I got the idea to take some Dramamine the other day during a particular bout of dizzyness and nausea. I think it helped me, but at the same time I wonder if it just had a placebo effect?

Well enough of my ramblings, if you got this far, I hope you will reply or message me. I am feeling pretty awful.

alwayzrn · 08-21-2008, 12:20 AM

Kim--I am so sorry that you are having such a hard time! Have you thought about seeing a dr about your possible depression? Cutting is definitely not the way to handle this and dramamine is a very good medicine, I have to take it because I get motion sickness...I mean with anything that moves! I hope that everything starts to work its way out. I know having PCOS gives you cysts, but do you think that you may have one that has grown? I know I had two cysts on my left ovary back in 2005 that made my ovary bigger than my uterus. I just wanted to give you big cyber {{{HUGZ}}}

Adrianne

sinnie · 08-21-2008, 12:40 AM

Thanks for the support. I made an appointment with my gyno to get checked over. I had a pretty big cyst on the left side, but now all my pain is on the right.

TheGigglingFrog · 08-21-2008, 06:01 AM

The acupuncture can really help with the depression! When I get a serious attack, I always go in and it seems to lift me back up a bit... it doesn't hurt at all, I highly recommend it!

Have you tried taking the Met in the evening? that helped me get through the worst of the initial unpleasantness...

alwayzrn · 08-21-2008, 10:09 AM

The met at night is a good idea, I have had to start doing that myself because I can't handle the GI effects. I'm glad that you made an appt with you gyne, I hope they do an u/s so they can see what your body is doing!

sinnie · 08-21-2008, 01:30 PM

I take 2000mg of met a day, so I take half in the morning and the rest in the evening like I always have. Do any of you take 2000mg at night at once??

As soon as I have some money I'll look into acupuncture but I am broke now and doubt insurance covers it.

alwayzrn · 08-21-2008, 02:24 PM

Double check your insurance because some insurances will pay for acupuncture.

TheGigglingFrog · 08-21-2008, 02:44 PM

A lot of times there are acupuncture clinics that have a sliding fee scale based on income... and it might not be as expensive as you think, but sometimes even a dollar will bust the bank so I understand watching the pennies... sometimes clinics will do it for free too, you just have to call around which is a pain in the butt... also, AL doesn't have any rules & regulations regarding who can practice Traditional Chinese Medicine so make sure whoever you go to can show you what accredited school they went too. Oregon & Washington (I live on the border) have some pretty strict laws, but not every state is the same at this time. You can call the Alabama Association of Oriental Medicine and they should be able to help you out... there phone number is (866) 606-6866.

If you are lucky enough to have a school of acupuncture near you, you can often times get excellent treatment at a reduced rate... and don't worry about it being students, they are highly supervised by masters... and remember that in a hospital you are often times treated by students and they are doing much more intrusive things to your body!

sinnie · 08-21-2008, 03:05 PM

Thanks for researching that a bit for me. I am going to check into it. Our insurance is pretty good but it doesn't cover that. It does cover to see a shrink so I might look into that also.
We have a lot of oriental people here because of Redstone Arsenal so I'd be surprised if there isn't a school around here somewhere.

How much could I expect to pay? Is there a range that is reasonable? I don't want to get ripped off.

TheGigglingFrog · 08-21-2008, 03:43 PM

well, hmmm, what to expect to pay... that is hard to say as every community is different. Here in the NW we are a little bit more open to alternative therapies than I think the rest of the country is, and because of that we have hundreds of options... We have a school and it is sliding fee, with student ID I paid $20 for acupuncture + varying amounts from a couple bucks to $40 for herbs, but those aren't necessary. I think the regular price if you have all the money you need is about $35. These are all private sessions at the school. I have a friend who goes to group acupuncture (everyone sits in comfy chairs in a room, fully clothed) and I think she said is was between $25-$50, as much as you can do, kind of an honor system. The group acupuncture is amazing... you get so much more bang for your buck because there are many people healing and the energy is moving and dynamic and really interesting... but group isn't for everyone. In our area, the cost for private session at an average clinic is anywhere from $45 on up. A lot of practitioners chose this path because they sincerely wanted to help people, knowing full well that it isn't a path to wealth. Because of that, many practitioners are generous beyond belief and would probably be willing to work with you. I have bartered for sessions before (I do bead work and needle work and created a custom piece for the gal).

Trust your gut on going to the acupuncturist... you saw them outside the dentist for a reason and it registered enough in your mind & heart to comment about it here. Here is a link for acupressure for depression... ( http://holisticonline.com/Remedies/D...cupressure.htm ) it is correct in the points that describes and it might help you out... certainly won't hurt. I was going to school here in Portland, OR for a while to become an acupuncturist, but 1/2 way through I realized that in no way do I want to be responsible for people's well being when I struggle with my own, it was quite a reality check. If you have any questions about Chinese Medicine, let me know and I will do my best to answer... and if I don't know, I might be able to find it in a text book

sinnie · 08-21-2008, 04:13 PM

Thanks so much TGF.
I am trying something new, well starting yesterday. I did some research on apple cider vinegar to help cleanse the body and ward off cravings (among other things.) I'm doing 2 TBSP 3 times a day before meals with some water. GOD it tastes horrible and makes me sick to the stomach for a few minutes afterward but it is working so far. I actually feel a bit better too, more energy and so far no dizzyness.
Again it's pretty soon so it might be a placebo effect, but it's giving me some hope.

I should have money to try out acupuncture by the end of October. I am also going to look for another job (I quit my job a few weeks ago to take a break and be at home)
So now money is pretty tight, and for us I'm watching every dollar because it is counting. I am having a yard sale tomorrow and Saturday so hopefully it will help.

Armystolehim04 · 08-21-2008, 04:19 PM

Hi
*hugs*
Im sorry your feeling that way.I can totally agree with the sex thing,bf sometimes doesn't understand and i don't want to let him down.But it hurts so bad.As much as they try they will never understand what its like!I'd love to try acupuncture but im broke and scared

.I take my metformin at night i am at 1500 though i take a 500 during the day and the 1000 at night,if i take the 1000 in the day i vomit (icky).I keep a bottle of pepto bismal in the fridge just incase i feel sick and ill take a capful if im feeling sick.I hope that helped and that you are feeling better.If you ever want to talk im here!

TheGigglingFrog · 08-21-2008, 04:28 PM

I LOVE the apple cider vinegar! It is hard to get down tho! I take it like a shot, about 1 TBSP in a shot glass with a huge glass of water after, right before I eat... it makes me kind of dizzy/woozy, sort of like if I took a shot of alcohol, but I feel so much better after!

sinnie · 08-21-2008, 06:50 PM

I'm hoping it helps me with weight loss. It doesn't make me dizzy, just stick in my stomach from the nasty taste, but it goes away soon.

battlingPCOS · 08-21-2008, 08:09 PM

Sinnie,
I'm so sorry that you are feeling depressed. Sounds like the Target incident triggered a bout of depression and urges to cut. I treat a lot of people with these two problems and think it's a great idea to see a therapist and possibly a psychiatrist, as well. You may want to start with therapy alone, especially given how sensitive you are to meds. Look for a therapist who specializes in cognitive behavior therapy (CBT) or dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), as there is strong research that these types of treatments help with the kinds of symptoms you are having. HTH. Take care.