I don't feel great and worry about dying...

Juliekaboolie · 06-12-2003, 01:49 PM

I wonder if others are feeling this way too? I never really feel too hot. I have a somewhat elevated bp (140/90) and was put on a diuretic for it. This freaked me out somewhat as I began worrying about heart attacks and stroke. I take Yasmin for my bcp and Paxil for panic attacks (with the ocassional Ativan thrown in). I don't take anything for insulin resistance but the dr *did* tell me that if I don't get my act together, I will be diabetic within 10 years.

I am in a constant state of worry about my health and I don't know where to begin to fix things. It seems my health has been declining since I got pg with my last baby (my son) and I don't know how to get things back under control! I keep trying things (diet and exercise) but it's sporadic and I eventually go back to not exercising (just feel too tired) and eating *ok*... not bad, really, but not excellent, either. I will be going back to work next month after being home for over 5 years with my 2 children and I'm excited about it and hopeful it will take me out of this health slump I seem to be in. Does anybody have any suggestions or support for me? I'm so sick of being scared all the time that I'm going to die by the age of 35. I just hate this syndrome!!! TIA!

*DannysMom* · 06-12-2003, 02:48 PM

I just wanted to say that I am sorry you are feeling so badly.
You mentioned you have a husband and two children. I could only imagine that in five years time that your focus has probably been your family. Why not make a commitment to yourself that when you start working you will make it TOP PRIORITY to schedule an appt with an appropriate dr... and begin an exercise routine that is manageable... and change your eating habits... and try your best to stick with it. And regarding your worry- this will be the impetus that gets you in the game. Don't consume yourself with worry as that is unhealthy- small amounts of worry is what gets you moving and doing the right thing.
Stay strong- you can do it! And good luck as you return to the work force!

Karen

angeltears · 06-12-2003, 03:01 PM

It seems to me that you are suffering from depression. I have the same exact thing. I have been taking Paxil for anxiety and panic attacks for years. The constant worry about your health and the feeling of doom and gloom are symptoms of depression and anxiety. I go through the same thing. The only thing I can tell you is to talk to you doctor about upping your Paxil dosage and find yourself a good endocrinologist who is familiar with treating PCOS. You may also want to limit your carb (starchy food) intake. I know that if I eat a lot of carbs, it makes me feel sick and awful.

Now this is my opinion only. I think that the depression, anxiety, and panic is caused from the hormonal (chemical) balance that women with PCOS suffer. I'm sure not all PCOS women have anxiety, but I think a lot of us do.

God Bless,

Juliekaboolie · 06-12-2003, 03:57 PM

it only ocurred to me this week that I am depressed. I'm always, always tired and wanting to sit around... the house is a mess which isn't like me, I find myself reading books or surfing the net for an escape. *sigh* My nickname in my family was "Ms. Sunshine" and I'm just not feeling like that at all anymore. I'm looking forward to going back to work a lot (teaching elementary) and I'll be starting a Master's degree program in July... both good stresses that help me take control of my life back. So I must not be so far gone that I'm not actually trying to help myself. I have a lot of guilt and anxiety over leaving my children... especially my son who will only be turning 3 at the end of July but I suppose a lot of newly working moms go through that initially... I'm just doing it a couple of years late. FWIW, I am in the process of increasing my Paxil with the goal of getting up to 40mg to treat the panic disorder. I don't like being that high especially since once I reach 30 mg my body reacts by me clenching my teeth all the time... it's really annoying. I like the idea of 'treating' myself to a diet and exercise program. I *have* done a lot giving and very little taking since having my kids. For some reason, it was my idea of love to always be martyring myself. They are great kids and very loving but I don't want them to think they have to be a martyr the way I am/was in order to show people that they love them. Sorry about the length of this... I guess I'm thinking aloud. Thank you so much for your support... it is really helpful to me.