hello fellow cysters. let me just explain. I LIVE IN A DEPRESSION THAT I CAN'T GET OUT FROM. AND IT'S ALL MY FAULT . IN 2004 ME AND THE LOVE OF MY LIFE SEPARATED. WE STARTED DATING OTHER PEOPLE. HE WENT BACK WITH HIS X AND I DATED SOMEBODY THAT I JUST MET AT THE TIME. AFTER A FEW MONTHS WE REALIZED THAT WE WANTED TO BE WITH EACH OTHER. HE PROMISED TO MAKE ME "HAPPY" AND HE TOLD ME ROSAURA YOU ARE THE ONLY WOMAN THAT I PICTURE BEING THE MOTHER OF MY KIDS." NOW CYSTERS THE TWIST TO THIS STORY. IS THAT 4 DAYS LATER. 4 DAYS LATER AFTER THOSE WORDS CAME OUT OF HIS MOUTH..IRONICALLY HE FOUND OUT HE HAD GOTTEN HIS X GIRLFRIEND PREGNANT. THAT'S WHEN I LEFT HIM AND I TOLD HIM TO START HIS FAMILY. AFTER MONTHS BEING AWAY FROM EACH OTHER WE COULDN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE AND I FOUND AN EMAIL OF HIS EX-GIRLFRIEND IN HIS EMAIL ACCOUNT(I STILL CHECKED THROUGH IT BAD HABIT) AND SHE WROTE HOW SHE KNEW THAT HE DIDN'T LOVE HER. AND THAT AT LEAST SHE WILL HAVE THIS BABY TO CARE OF.
NOW CYSTERS EVENTUALLY ALOT OF THINGS HAPPENED IN THIS TIME THAT MADE ME GO BACK WITH THE ONLY MAN I EVER LOVED. WE GOT ENGAGED AND IN MAY OF 2005 . HIS BABY WAS BORN.
WE LIVE TOGETHER AND I AM THE BETTER WOMEN, WHEN HE BRINGS PICTURES OF THE BABY I FRAME THEM.. BUT YOU GIRLS CAN'T IMAGINE LAST WEEK SOMEBODY CAME TO OUR HOUSE AND SAYED WOW REFERRING TO ME TOLD ME YOUR BABY LOOKS EXACTLY LIKE YOU. YOU CAN TELL SHE IS YOUR DAUGHTER.. IRONICALLY THAT BABY LOOKS MORE LIKE MY DAUGHTER THAN THE REAL MOM ITSELF.
BUT NOW CYSTERS WHEN WE HAVE AN ARGUMENT HE BLURS OUT THE ONLY PERSON I CARE ABOUT IS MY DAUGHTER. OR WAT IS WORST IS THAT , I WAS THE ONLY PERSON HE INVISIONED AS THE MOTHER OF HIS KIDS. NOW I HAVE TO WAIT.EVERYTHING IS IN HIS TERMS. AND NOW WHEN HAVE SEX HE IS PARANOID THAT I WILL GET PREGNANT. HE CANT HANDLE 2 KIDS RIGHT NOW IS WHAT HE SAYS.
THIS SUMMER I CONFESSED THAT I HAVE PCOS TO HIM S AND TOLD HIM ALL MY SYMPTONS AND HE CRYED.
BUT I FEEL THAT SLOWLY HE IS GETTING TIRED OF ME. I DON'T EVEN ENJOY SEX AT ALL.
ITS BAD ENOUGH THAT WOMEN LIKE OURSELVES WILL HAVE THE OBSTACLE OF TRYING TO CONCEIVE.. BUT IT JUST MAKES IT SO HARD FOR ME THAT THE LOVE OF MY LIFE ALREADY HAS HIS BUNDLE OF JOY. AND I FEEL LONELY AND DEPRESSED I CANT TAKE THIS ANY LONGER. I DONT WANT TO BE JUST A STEP-MOTHER GOD PLEASE I WANT TO BE A MOTHER....
LADIES I WILL KEEP YOU POSTED I HAVE TO GO THE DOCTORS ON FRIDAY. I DON'T HAVE INSURANCE SO GETTING MY MEDICINES FOR MY PCOS IS DIFFICULT .
Things will work for the best, whatever road that might be!!!!!
__________________ SCOTTISHSWEETIE
Me- 33 To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
3 fur babies- kitties (Sophie, Abby, and Jewels) To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
My special Kitty, Sidney, went to Heaven Christmas day, 2007. I will miss him forever To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Meds- too many meds to mention here Diagnosed with PCOS- 1998
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It sounds as though you both have a lot on your plate right now. There are a lot of unresolved issues and emotions regarding his old relationship and his daughter on both ends, and it sounds as though you are both caught in the middle. You sounds very frustrated and hurt right now, and he sounds rather confused. While I really feel for you, I think you need to resolve where you are at now before you add another child to the mix. It's perfectly normal for him to have such strong feelings for his daughter, but you are understandably upset that she isn't yours as well. It's also perfectly normal for you to feel left-out because you feel that he has what you want for the both of you. You definitely have some resentment for the relationship that brought about the child, but is it possible you are passing on that resentment to his daughter?
I hope you are able to get the medication you need to help your PCOS, but even more importantly, I think you need someone to talk to. It may be that you both need someone to talk to. However, being that depressed isn't helping anyone, and you need to feel better about yourself before you can really focus on your relationship.
I feel like nobody can relate 
