I feel as tho PCOS is ruining my relationship with my boyfriend=(
Hello everyone, I am worried that Im going to ruin my relationship with my boyfriend because I feel so ugly all of the time. I am always covering myself up..And Im sure it bothers him. For example during sex, I always try to cover my tummy and my boobs. My tummy cause Im fat and my boobs because I hate them. I had some laser done on my breast for the hair I had and there are some small pigment marks and I feel very embarassed. He doesnt seem to care he says he likes my boobs. Then theres my hairy a$$.... thats the most embarassing part of it all........he tells me im beautiful everyday, but I dont feel beautiful in fact I feel ugly, fat, hairy , disgusting. I dont want to lose him but I cant open up because Im not happy with my body....
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You are beautiful and don't you deny yourself that. He loves and try and work on being happy with yourself. If you can't just pretend it is not there. I have a huge belly, bird beak boobs, a hairy-flat but, abit extra hairy face, thinning hair, and a flat nose and when my bf tells me he loves me and that I am the sexiest woman on earth I put on a smile and pretend to be the sexiest woman on earth. It took me time and alot of prayer and alot of self-esteem work but I got there and so could you! To all try not and be too hard on yourself and see what why it is that you have this syndrome and remember your heart makes up your sexy self not this stupid syndrome!
I know it sucks. I recently broke up with my boyfriend of 10 months because I 'wasn't attractive enough for him'. I know he's just being an arse because we've broken up twice before and each time he's come back telling me I'm 'so attractive and my personality's awesome' etc. etc. But that 'sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me' is a load of crap. Words hurt too.
A lot of stress has been put on our relationship in the last month - I had to go off the pill b/c my doctor wanted unaffected blood tests (and he was being careful enough that we would only have sex if both the pill and condoms were involved), I think he also freaked out because of all the urine tests and blood tests I was having to do. It sucks because of all times to break up - this would have been a time I could have really done with his support. I hate myself for wanting him back because I know I deserve better than that
__________________ Age: 23
DX: 2004
Medication: Estelle (BCP), Vit. B, Spiro
Symptoms: High cholesterol, Hirsutism, Cysts, Weight probs
Height: 167 cm
Exercise: 40-60 mins a day 4-6 days a week
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If you bf says he loves the way you look then try to take it to heart. Take what he says and try to build up your self-confidence. Sounds like you have a real supportive guy. Talk to him and tell him how you feel and your insecurities. I'm sure he will not only understand you and your PCOS better, but it will help to bring you two closer together, and hopefully help you to feel more comfortable around him.
I know exactly how you feel. I get so embarrassed with my bf when he is looking at my body. He, like your wonderful bf, tells me I am beautiful all of the time. Do I feel it? Not really. I just have to put a smile on my face and thank him. Be thankful for your love and for a wonderful man! You are beautiful, even if you don't always feel it. I have excess hair, a weight issue, ugly stretch marks, thinning hair and all that jazz too. Tell yourself that you are beautiful no matter what. If you don't believe it and think it, then it will be harder for others to see your beauty. I am not confidant of my size . . . that is why I put on a dim light when we make love. I don't feel as exposed. Your BF must really love you, otherwise he wouldn't be so understanding of your self conciousness. My butt is pretty hairy too!! I try not to think about it. My main goal with that is just to make sure I am clean! Do things to make yourself feel sexy and beautiful. Give yourself a pedicure . . . a facial . . . buy a sexy pair of underwear. You might not feel as sexy as you want, but man, if there was a doubt of how beautiful your bf thought you are then you spending a little pampering time to make yourself feel good will seal the deal! Also, talk to him about EVERYTHING you are going through. He will be more understanding if you do.
I too know how you feel. I've ruined a lot of relationships b/c of my self-esteem issues. I would never make love if the light was on, and forget during the day. Even when an ex bf made me stand there completely nude and told me how beautiful I was, I still didn't believe him. It's hard to see yourself the way that loved ones do. You are more critical on the tiniest things that most people would overlook. Your bf loves you for you no matter what your body is like. It took me a long time to understand that w/ my fiancée, and I actually still sit there and complain to him about what my body looks like sometimes. But there's so much love there, that the outside appearance is not the most important thing. And remember, there was an attraction to start the relationship. This can be hard to deal with, hope you get to feeling better!
Locagirl - hun, you’re better off without him. If he can't see you for who you are, then he's not worth your time. Don't hate yourself for wanting him back, it's a normal feeling that you want the one you love. In time, that feeling will pass because you know that he's not good enough for you. I know this doesn't help the pain and hurt he put you through, but you will be so happy that this happened when you find someone better. Hang in there and you've got SC for support!
__________________ Starlite
Me-28, DH-29 DD 1, born Sept 17th, 2007 DD 2, born June 9th, 2009
Can't wait to start WW again and loose the other 15lbs I gained with the last pregnancy and the 30lbs I still needed to lose with the first one.
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You just have to keep telling yourself that he is with you because he wants to be with you; and no matter what you see in yourself, he obviously sees something desireable in you.
In the past, I have had a hard time reconciling the way I feel about my body, and the way the men in my life feel about my body. Now, I am finally starting to really "get it" that I'm just fine the way I am. My lover calls my breasts beautiful, my fat rolls my "curves" and tells me that I am hot.
The thing is, that we have got to get over our insecurities and accept that the men in our lives find us attractive, desireable, sexy, and worthy. And we have got to at least try and see ourselves through their eyes.
Tracy
__________________ "Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo"....... H.G. Wells
Oh sweetie I think everyone here has had times where the body is the enemy.
The thing is that you have a BF who loves you for who you are and you need to start to look at yourself in the mirror and say at least 10 good things about your body daily.
BTW- I hit the point where I didn't like where my body was going (100lbs gain in a year will do that to anyone) and I ended up in a great relationship. He's been great at telling me how much he loves me and he even helps me pluck my chin hairs.
If you need to have someone to talk to who's been there I am always open to PM's.
Oh sweetie I think everyone here has had times where the body is the enemy.
The thing is that you have a BF who loves you for who you are and you need to start to look at yourself in the mirror and say at least 10 good things about your body daily.
Isn't that the truth?! There are some days that I can barely look at myself in the mirror because I'm so repulsed by my own reflection. We've all been there, Hon. Canadianmutation gives some great advice, too, when she says to remember the good things about yourself every day. Sounds like you have a wonderful boyfriend, too. Now it's time for you to see yourself the way that he does. ((hugs))
__________________ Toodee (Ann) Age: 39 Wisconsin, USA Re-married, No children 2 dogs, 1 cat, 4 fish, 1 frog Diagnosed with PCOS in 1989 See my profile for "the rest of the story"
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Hey, I think you need to toughen up with yourself!! You are beautiful!!! Doesn't matter what the stupid mirror says!! You know you are beautiful!! This stupid syndrome doesn't make us ugly; it makes us stronger, more beautiful women!! Think a man could deal with this??? Ha!! Ha!! Ha!! If your boyfriend tells you that you are beautiful, then to him you are. I've learnt to believe them when they say nice things. Cheer up and don't worry about anything. If you think you are ugly, then you will make yourself ugly! Don't think that way!! We are all beautiful. Doesn't matter if we have a moustache, are losing hair, have big tummies and bad mood swings. We are all BEAUTIFUL!!!!
__________________ I AM A STRONG WOMAN! NOTHING AND NO ONE CAN CHANGE THAT! To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Meds: Metformin: 1000mg/day A good bed Lots of sleep!
aww girl ~ your bf sound really wonderfull ... and you do too!!! this disease tends to affect not only our bodies but also our minds and makes us believe we're ugly or not worth much. BUT YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL, please believe that!!! i also had a hard time believing my fiancée when he told my i'm sexy and that he likes my curves, (i call it fat ~ he calls it beauty and i like his way of thinking ) but trust me once you start to ignore the little voice in your head telling you your ugly and fat you'll see the woman you've always been (and the one your bf sees) ~ a pretty, smart, sexy and beautiful woman!
__________________ Sophie
Age: 30
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DX: April 2002 Meds: Was on:Clomid, Provera, Menopur, Glucophage TTC'ing since: June '08 To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
~I try to take one day at a time, but sometimes several days attack me at once~
I feel the same way around my boyfriend, he tells me that i am beautiful but everytime we have any kind of intercourse i feel uncomftorable because of my body. But he has seen every part of me, and yet i still get nervous. I am sure you will get through it! i wish the best for you and your boyfriend!!!
Good luck!
--Courtney
__________________
-::~*Courtney
started weight: 265
current weight 255
::*Goal*:: 190
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I feel as tho PCOS is ruining my relationship with my boyfriend=( 
