I must be completely insane...thinking of TTC again...

~Traci~ · 03-16-2009, 05:14 PM

I didn't really know where to put this but I thought here would be appropriate here since everyone here understands the fear of trying again.

I called my old RE to get my records to see a new RE (we moved to a different state). I think I'm really grasping @ straws for answers...

We adopted our DD from China 19 months ago & we want her to have a sibling! I've always seen myself as a mom to "more than 1". We can't/don't want to adopt from China again for multiple reasons, we're afraid of going to another country, & we don't want to adopt domestically. Our only option is to TTC again.

I'm totally terrified @ this b/c there is no explaination of WHY I had so many (4) m/c's a few years ago. I'm hoping if I see a new dr (which actually is an old dr that I saw about 9 years ago & he dx'd me w/ PCOS!) maybe he'll have another idea to help me STAY pg but there's just no guarantee.

I'm completely terrified to attempt this for a couple reasons. 1. I'll be 35 in June & 2. a horrible fear of more m/c's when we don't even know why it happened in the 1st place. Please tell me I'm crazy to be attempting this again...

Thanks for reading,
Traci

AnotherDreamer · 03-16-2009, 05:48 PM

I think that if this is something you want to do then you should go for it.

I can understand your fear. I recently had my second m/c (I'm moving onto repeat loss testing now.) And I swear, the very idea of getting pregnant again scares the bajeezus out of me. I think I may have post traumatic stress disorder or something at this stage... I dunno, but I am terrified of getting pregnant because in my mind pregnancy=miscarriage and lots of pain.

But, if you want to go forward, and are willing to take that risk... go for it. Hopefully your new doctor can be more proactive. Maybe he would let you try heparin or lovenox as a precaution... some woman don't test positive for clotting disorders but still benefit from using blood thinners. You never know.

Best wishes hun, good luck in whatever it is you decide to do.

enits · 03-16-2009, 06:42 PM

I wish you the best!

I can certainly understand your fears. After 2 miscarriages, I did not think I could ever go the TTC road again, but DH and I went for it hand in hand. It was a scary pregnancy; I didn't enjoy it at all given my awful experience. It certainly was worth it, though, in the end. During my pregnancy with DS, my doctor monitored me carefully and watched me like hawk. He was certainly on board with all my fears. (By the way, I had to fire my other OB because he thought my fears were not valid.)

Good luck and lots of baby dust to you! (((hugs)))

~Traci~ · 03-16-2009, 07:40 PM

I've heard of heparin used before for clotting. I've never tested positive for a clotting disorder but I know that w/ every single pg'cy I've had clots & tons of bleeding. I've been reading up on it more & will bring it up to my dr along w/ baby ASA.

Thanks for the suggestions!
Traci

kwannabee · 03-21-2009, 05:29 PM

Traci I have wondered about you and how your beautiful dd were doing...because you know how i love her pretty little name...

as for ttcing again after being rung through the ringer by old ma nature..if you're crazy...i must have been crazy too. Cuz i did it, been there done that and got the stretch marks...

...Logan is my miracle, chosen for me from Heaven by his two big sisters...

and even with that divine help i busted my butt and barged my way into a few doctors offices even though they thought of me as a bit loony.

I know in my heart that if your heart is telling you that its okay to try again...you just have to listen.

All i can say is that as you know refreshing your memory will be alot easier with SC, but when it comes to finding proper medical care...think of yourself as a smart consumer, a smart shopper even, and get your game plan in place. Best of luck and i am sending you tons of babydust! And give DD a huge hug...and i send one to you also.

~Traci~ · 03-22-2009, 09:16 PM

Thanks Kim! We're doing good..she keeps bugging me about a baby though! She's more baby crazy than I am! I'm actually going back to my old RE (that dx'd me w/ PCOS) so hopefully I won't need to do much coaxing to do what I want (heparin)!

I got most of my supplements today to prepare & I have to send off tomorrow for my records, then I'll make the appt! I'm excited but completely nervous! LOL, DH keeps saying we better get moving b/c we're not getting any younger...I keep telling him that if 50 yr olds can have babies, so can I (granted, I'll be 35 in June so I have some time left!)!

Hugs to you & Logan too!
Traci

tcrock02 · 03-23-2009, 02:13 PM

TTC Again- words i thought i would not say so soon after my 3rd miscarriage. but somehow we pick up the pieces of our shattered dreams and try to move forward. i go for my RPL results on the 30th and i am terrified he will find nothing wrong. 3 losses is enormous to me although i see many of you have had many more. but there has to be a reason that 2 babies with heartbeats at 6weeks on target just suddenly stopped beating.....hugs for all of you and baby dust to us all

R0xyg4l · 03-26-2009, 01:26 AM

Traci ~ Best of luck! Miracles happen and it can happen for you. You're not crazy... you can do this and I hope you have a great outcome!

khenders · 03-26-2009, 07:00 PM

I must be insane with you. I am having ttc fever again. New re docs can bring new hope. that is what i am going through. My old re doc dropped the ball on testing some things and since being with the new doc, i have had removal of adhesions on my uterus and diagnosed with mthfr. dont give up!