I was diagnosed with PCOS 3 years ago at the age of 20. I am taking vitex to regulate my hormones and my menstrual cycle with great success. My biggest problem is my hair growth on my face, upper lip, chin and cheeks. I began shaving when I was around 15, long before i knew i had pcos. I just thought i was a freak. I didn't know i actually had a disease that was causing it. Anyway, i am involved with a wonderful man who treats me like a princess. He knows that I have PCOS and i've explained to him all about the various symptoms, including infertility. He has been very supportive. The only thing I haven't told him about is the hair. I am so afraid he is going to catch me in the bathroom with a razor to my face. I can't think of anything more humiliating. He knows that i don't like my face to be touched but he doesn't understand why. I just can't bring myself to tell him. I wouldn't even consider telling him except that I want to get a good men's electric razor to better control the hair. The razor that I use for my legs just doesn't do a very good job. I work at a restaurant, where I have to wear my hair back and expose my whole face so waxing is out of the question since I would have to wait on the hair to grow out a certain length before waxing. I need to remove hair on a daily basis and shaving is the only option right now. I am constantly aware of my problem while at work. I know that i develop stubble after about 5-6 hours after shaving and i'm so afraid that my co-workers are going to notice. I have to get a good razor for removing it but i don't know how to justify such a purchase to my fiance. I am terrified to tell him. I know that he will support me but he sees me as this beautiful creature, I am just afraid that this will ruin his image of me. I'm scared!! Can anyone give me some advice? How did you tell your husband or boyfriend about this? Thanks for listening. I'm so glad I found this board. I've had no one to talk to about this for three years.
Congrats on finding a good man! He sounds like a doll- and there is, indeed, a good chance that he may have noticed this himself. I've never told my boyfriend but I assume he saw it for himself, it'd be hard not to when I first get up in the morning and have no makeup on!
Maybe try surfing the net when he's around and go to this website. Heck, point out the 'hair in the wrong places' forum and sigh and tell him that's one of the things you hate most about PCOS.
If he's your fiance, he obviously wants to spend the rest of his life with you unconditionally - isn't that the idea of marriage?
Go ahead and tell him, I'm sure you'll be pleasantly surprised how he takes it.
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Diagnosed Aug 2005. Symptoms: No periods, obese, excessive hair
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I'm sure your fiancee would love you anyway but I think you shouldn't tell him. I've been married to my dh for 13 years but I've never felt the urge to tell him about this problem. ( I have been plucking my chin hair for 20 years on a daily basis)
I will not tell my hubby .. We been together for 6 years and he does not need to know if he asks me fine i would tell him and like you i don't let him touch my face ..lol
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I agree - don;t tell him unless he asks. He probably already knows, but little unspoken secrets lke these are OK in a realtionship. He probably won't even ask you about the razor. My husband pretends to ignore the Nair in our bathroom, and I always use it when he is out of the house. Any he knows he can't touch my face.
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Goal: Better general health, drop 60 lbs, gain control of the hair and acne, give my DH his wife back.
Metformin - 1000 mg (changed 10/06 from 2000 mg - NOT by choice) Spiro - 25 mg (reduced from 50 mg 10/06 - NOT by choice) Lipitor 40 mg (dosage increased 10/06) Tricor 145 mg (added 10/06) Zovia 1/35 (since 08/06)
I wouldn't tell him. 1. I'm quite sure by now he has noticed and loves you regardless. Besides most men prefer to keep their illusions of perfection. Even if you don't have PCOS they really don't want to know about the lip, bikini waxing, plucking, hair dye, makeup, coverup, rollers, wraps, facial masks, shape enhancements woman endure to look good. All they want to see is the final product :-)
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I Hiked Mt Fuji in Japan in AUGUST 2006
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I agree with Kat. I never actually 'spilled the beans' regarding my hairiness to dh, but he knew, I mean common who are we kidding. I was shaving and plucking daily , I had scars from all the ingrown hairs I tried to get out. I would never wear my hair up, even if it was 200 degrees outside and my hair was matted to my hair, I would never let him touch my face which he always tried. When I brought up the laser thing and the cost he didn't blink an eye and supported the cost. He said whatever will make me happy is fine with him. I really love that I can wear my hair up, and I do it daily since I had my babies. What I love more is the way he touches my face. I know it's a samll gesture but makes me feel like a wanted woman kwim? Good luck!
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I too was afraid to tell my husand for a while. But I decided that he married me and loves all of me. If your significant other loves you, he will love you no matter what. I recently told mine that I had hair on my chest, because I was afraid he would catch me plucking it, and not long after I told him, he walked into the bathroom and caught me. He didn't think anything of it. He sees me pluck my face all the time. I think he loves me more for being honest and he tries to understand what I go through.
In marriage, its best to be honest with your partner and leave the lines of communication open. I was embarrassed to tell him, but its made our relationship better because of my honesty. After I told him that I was dx with pcos, I went to a website and put it in front of him to read. That also helped him to understand what I am dealing with. I think he loves me more for sharing my problems with him instead of hiding it from him.
You need to decide for yourself if you need to tell him or not. I wish you luck and I hope this has helped you.
__________________ DX 1994-told to lose weight by GYN,Suffered 12 years before seeking treatments: REDX 2006 by a family doc sent to endo July 31, 2006 and glad I went; Byetta, 2000mg Metformin, 28 units of levemir, fish oil, 1000mg calcium. Type 2 diabetic and high cholesterol dx March 05, psoriasis dx 1992. Married 20 yrs 2 kids: girl 19 yrs old and boy 17 yrs old.
Good luck in whatever you decide to do I have never told my dbf about my hair removal, but I know he knows. . . oh well, something I just choose to ignore. Men have some things they do that they don't want us women to know about either. Your fiance sounds like a wonderfully accepting and non-judgmental man, so if you can muster the courage to tell him, YOU GO GIRL! and if not, no harm no foul. I had to go to the doc regarding another yeast infection the other day and I told my man that I had an appointment. . . he of course, wanted to know why. I told him not to worry and that was that. He really need not know about things like that and I feel no obligation to tell him. Just like I really don't want to know if he has sweaty balls LOL!
Anyway, take care!
Not ttc. DH has had a vasectomy. We have 2 gorgeous boys, 2 and 4. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
This thread is making me feel a bit better! I've been with my boyfriend for about a year and a half now, he knows I have a hormone imbalance and that it's harder to lose weight/I have to be a bit more careful with what I eat and my exercising. He know I'm going to an endo to try and sort the problem and that I take the BCP to try and balance out my hormones.
I don't go on about leg waxing all the time to him etc. so why draw attention to any other form of hair removal? This has stressed me out a bit in the past, but I had a bit of a think about it - and if it's not causing any probs, just as Kat put it - 'don't see the need to point out all of our [perceived] flaws to men. They don't point out theirs to us'. My boyfriend doesn't seem to notice it, and if he has he hasn't said anything. I'm learning to deal with it, so if it's not causing problems, no reason to point out my insecurity and make a bigger deal of it.
__________________ Age: 23
DX: 2004
Medication: Estelle (BCP), Vit. B, Spiro
Symptoms: High cholesterol, Hirsutism, Cysts, Weight probs
Height: 167 cm
Exercise: 40-60 mins a day 4-6 days a week
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I need support telling my fiance.... 
