I think my boss is a cyster

furrygal · 09-12-2009, 02:07 PM

I want to say something but don't want to hurt her feelings or make work awkward. It is noticeable that she shaves her chin/sideburns and she has very hairy arms. I've also noticed chest hair. She's close to my age and I want to reach out to her as a friend and someone that has some of the same experiences. Should I?

JenJen80 · 09-12-2009, 02:29 PM

That's a tough call. I don't think I'd risk making both of you feel awkward by outright asking her. Does she know you have PCOS? Maybe you could ask her to talk for a minute and then say something like "Is it going to be a problem if I have to take a few hours off here and there next month for several doctors appointments? I have a medical condition called PCOS and my symptoms have been flaring up." If she has it too, that could be her cue to tell you. And if she happens to follow up and say something about you not taking time off for the "appointments" just tell her you were able to get them scheduled outside of work hours. Good luck!

Anonykat · 09-12-2009, 05:18 PM

I wouldn't. If she's smart enough to be someone's boss, she's smart enough to investigate her own health and doesn't need anyone to tell her she has PCOS - I would feel like crap if someone felt the need to point out to me they noticed my outward symptoms.

Telling her that YOU have it, like the above post suggests, is fine, and then leaving the ball in her court. I would never, ever let on your suspicions about her, though.

tysmama · 09-12-2009, 06:10 PM

I agree! I'd feel real weired if somone just pointed out all my flaws!

Carolina5070 · 09-12-2009, 09:16 PM

No, I wouldn't. She may have it, but not even know it. Given that you work with her, she also may want to keep her health issues a private topic.

JenJen80 · 09-12-2009, 09:51 PM

I think it also depends on your office dynamics. Either way, I still wouldn't ask outright, but I mean depending on how small and tight-knit, or large and anonymous, your place of business is may make a difference. Like my office is small, only 8 women work there and we know way TMI about one another! They all know that I have PCOS and my struggle with infertility. My boss acts like one of us, so I think she'd be like, "Hey, I have that too!"...but if she didn't, I still wouldn't say "Hey...I noticed you have excess arm and chin hair and are a little overweight...do you have PCOS like me?"

Kathy2579 · 09-12-2009, 10:25 PM

You could always start a casual conversation like OMG I hate waxing and shaving my PCOS makes it so much worse.. see what happens

ivetastedflight · 09-12-2009, 10:38 PM

My advice: if you want to bring this up, get creative. Some of the suggestions here are possible ice breakers - but as PP's have mentioned, even if she has PCOS, and realizes that you do, too, it doesn't necessarily mean that she wants to share that part of her life with you.

Tread lightly.

wishesfornewtomorrow · 09-18-2009, 01:45 AM

I would not mention it to her. It could hurt her feelings. I understand you want to reach out. Who knows, maybe she is a member here. But I know how sensitive I am and utterly bitter about it. I cant imagine it would be any different for her. And she might be embarrassed to admit she has it also. Its an awkward subject in the workplace. If it were a friend of yours I would say ok go ahead. But she is your boss, and you never know if she will be offended so I wouldnt advice it just in case. I am certain she knows what she has, when I started growing facial hair I immediatly sought out my doc and he told me I had it. So she probably doesnt just shave without asking her doc what is this on my face.