No offense, but it stinks to be back here. Luckily, there are so many beautiful and wonderful ladies to mourn with.
DH and I found out yesterday that our baby dies at about 10 weeks. We thought we were close to 14 weeks along. It was a long and torturous ordeal involving a lot of waiting, a trip to the hospital (with a sonographer that would NOT tell us whether or not she saw a heartbeat - *****) and then dealing with the news that my baby is gone.
I'm left with the terrible choice of D&C or natural miscarriage. There are many reasons why I do not want a D&C - the risks, the anesthesia (never had it before), and having to wait a few months before trying again.
The downside to doing it naturally, as I'm sure many of you know, is the waiting. My doctor said she has no idea when my body will get that its not pregnant anymore. Then I'll get to enjoy all that blood, pain, and the inevitable passing of my baby, which I don't particularly want to see, but I can be strong.
To me, the worst thing about doing it naturally is the waiting. It could be days, or it could be weeks. I don't want it to sneak up on me one day and bring this all back again. I don't want to walk around knowing that I'm carrying my dead baby. I want to get it over with now, so we can try again.
I've heard that some cysters have been induced to get things moving. What did the doctors do? I'm going to call mine today and ask her about it, but I'm curious as to what you ladies have experienced.
How long did it take? Were there any side effects?
Thanks so much. I still can't believe I even have to ask this. I thought for sure that this one was going to make it. I guess God needs a little more time to make my baby extra special.
Tensei, I'm so very very sorry for your loss. This is a horrible thing, especially as you were at a point where you probably felt you had passed a big hurdle. I had hoped to see all you ladies on the November board go strong without me, and this is hard. My tech told me anything I asked, but that may have been because the initial call on no heartbeat had come from my doctor the day before on his little machine, so I went in there saying "this is what he saw, so what do you see?" and she told me.
Regarding the natural m/c, there are some chemical pills or suppositories that the doctors can give you to induce a m/c, but my understanding is that after a certain point, they don't like to do that as there's too much to pass. Find out if the doctor will give you the pills or suppositories. If not, although I am aware of some herbs out there that can allegedly move things along, those really scare me, are unregulated, and if taken in the wrong amounts, or on the advice of a so-called 'herbalist' who doesn't know what they're doing, or the herbs aren't what they claim to be, could really mess you up. Also, what might upset you even more is that when you do the research on this on the internet, you will fast move out of the area of "miscarriage" and the searches will put you into discussions of abortion. I have never liked the idea of abortion, but at the moment it makes me so angry and upset as soon as I hit one of those pages I had to shut it all down. (I had some of the same questions you did, and wondered the same things)
I'm not sure if it helps, but here's my experience with the D&C, to perhaps ease some of your concerns if you do eventually go that route. I found out at about the ten week mark that the baby had stopped developing at 7 weeks. During that three weeks I had had practically no external symptoms -- just a single faint wipe of something that could be blood on the toilet tissue (which is why I went to the doctor). After two ultrasounds to confirm non-development, the doctor scheduled a D&C -- for a week later. In the intermediate time, I finally started to have some slightly stronger spotting (but never any bright red blood), but no cramping or any signs that there was a serious attempt for the process to really get underway on its own, so by the time I went in for the procedure it was a month since development stopped. Doctors start to get nervous at this point, because there's a risk of infection to us from having this tissue inside, and that too can cause problems down the road.
On the anaesthesia, I had only had it once before (terrified of it then), but this time it wasn't bad -- you don't get the full thing with the tube down the throat, just an IV in the arm with what I call "the goofy juice". They started the IV at about 3:30, and the doctor told me, "the ride down the hall is going to be all you remember", and that's kind of what it was. I perceived being pushed around on the gurney for a while, and when it finally stopped, I opened my eyes thinking I was in the OR, and instead the nurse was standing next to me saying 'it's over'. It was about 4:05 -- so only about half an hour. I had one strong cramp when I woke up, and I got a shot of something and some ibuprofen, and to be honest after that I have only had to take a grand total of 6 advil (two when I got home before I went to bed, and four singletons over the next two days), and never for anything I felt was real pain.
Bleeding has been similar -- minor, rarely red, and never soaking through anything -- I think on only one day did I decide I 'needed' to actually change the pad. I'm not quite at the two week point yet, and I'm still having minor stuff - usually something dark brown when I wipe, and a little passage of something in the morning when I wake up as I've been lying down all night, but nothing of concern. The hardest part has been waiting for it to stop, because I'm like "enough already -- it's over, I know that, stop reminding me". But it hasn't been painful or excessive or even close to a real period. Basically, physically nothing hurts, which in an odd way has been difficult because I keep thinking I should have something to show for being pregnant.
The worst aftereffect has been hormone related. I'd call it "mood swings", but there's really only one mood -- angry and short tempered. I function, but the slightest bit of idiocy sets me off on a rant and I've been screaming at people. Normally, I think things and keep my mouth shut, but now whenever someone wants something stupid and trivial done, I call them on it. It's a combination of the hormonal readjustment and genuine anger and grief. This may happen to you no matter which route you take. Depending on what's in the pills the doctor might give you, this could become worse -- I know that any pills that mess with hormones chemically (like BCPs) really get me in a bad way. As awful as I feel now, this is still nothing like the BCP-induced depression/paranoia I went through a couple of years ago.
Again, I'm so terribly sorry. I had hoped to never see any of you here.
I called my doctor and she said that the baby is too big to induce. She said that it may not even work, and if it does, it'll be a whoooole lot of blood.
I've decided to go ahead and do a D&C. I'm not all that wild about having an IV needle stuck in my arm, but I really can't sit around and wait a few weeks for this to happen on its own. I'm scheduled for Tuesday, so I get to sit here and think about it 'til then.
Tensei: I am so very sorry you have to go through this again.
My D&C they did do the IV and the tube down the throat. I had to insert a suppository the night before the procedure which helps to soften the cervix and also helps with post-surgical bleeding and helps to contract the uterus down after the procedure. I wouldn't have know that the put the tube down except that I asked when the anesthesiologist asked me to open my mouth so she could see my throat. (I remember them asking me this when I had my ovarectomy.) They gave me the IV first so you are totally asleep when the yput the tube in your throat. There were no side effects from the throat thing with the D&C. (I remember with my ovarectomy, my neck/throat was kind of sore afterward, but I think that is because I was under so much longer. I couldn't stand waiting for the D&C and was relieved when it was done--it is horrible doctors make you wait. I had some of the closure I needed. I remember waking up in the recovery room just crying and crying. My silent mc was at 11w with the baby dying around 7 or 8. I had no symptoms of MC and no bleeding prior. The bleeding was not too bad. I believe I had my first AF approximately five weeks after the D&C. The RE told me to abstain/allow one cycle, try on our own, and then we went back to clomid on the second cycle. I just had my IUI this morning.
Good luck to you. I'll have you in my prayers.
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My doctor said that I won't need a tube. She said they're going to put me on regular oxygen and also supply some in the medication. She said since it's only about a 10 minute procedure, the tube won't be necessary.
I chose to go naturally, however I was only 5 weeks along when the baby died. I didn't know it until 6 weeks 2 days... the OB nurse said all I would have was "strong period cramps", so I elected not to have the D&C. It was the following weekend, last weekend to be exact, a week after the initial bleeding started, that I passed everything. There was a LOT of blood and a lot of tissue that came out, and the pain was the absolute worst pain I've ever experienced in my life... and I've had 2 major abdominal surgeries....
Needless to say, if I ever miscarry again, I am going straight to D&C. Good luck sweetie, and I am SO sorry that this happened to you! If you need anything, please PM me anytime! Hang in there!
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On a TTC break...
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I'm so sorry! I hope it goes smoothly Tuesday and that the physical part of this is over soon. (((Hugs)))
As for the IV insertion, you can ask if there's a chance someone can numb the site first. A nurse anesthetist can do this before putting the IV in, and you will barely know anything is happening. I hope that helps a little.
__________________ Metformin 1500mg, Yasmin, managing IR/pcos with lower carbs
First pregnancy ended at 23 weeks due to incompetent cervix.
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Mary Catherine will be in our hearts forever, November 28, 2003.
Second loss March 9, 2004 at five weeks
Third pregnancy, Cerclage at 13w
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Duncan 2/11/05, 9lb 3oz
Fourth pregnancy, Cerclage at 13w
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Ruby 2/27/06, 9lbs
Inducing natural miscarriage? 
